older children at birth

Rebecca - posted on 03/02/2010

This is exactly what I worry about with my daughter. I am pregnant with the second on and I dont know what is going to happen with her while Im in labour with the second one. My biggest fear is going into labour in the middle of the night. Im lucky that my family lives close so that they can come and take care of her if need be. Im thinking of asking my sister to come stay with us at the end with her son so if it does happen in the middle of the night she is close by and I dont have to wake them up. I think it would be a good idea to have your son stay at home with grampa because labour can be long and at least you know your own home and family memebers you will know your son is well cared for and in an environment that he is comfortable.

Elysia - posted on 03/02/2010

thanks erin its nice to know some1 who has had that experience, i def wouldnt want him in there during the pushing stage but i do think i will b alot calmer and relaxed and be able to focus know he is there, he will of course go home with daddy after i have the baby (not looking forward to that) i think my biggest prob is i dont trust any1 to look after him cause they just cant do it as well

Medic - posted on 03/01/2010

I just had my daughter and my son stayed between my parents and a friend of mine for the 6 days I was in the hospital and my husband stayed with me. He was fine and had so much fun....but the hospital did have the rule that no children under 12 can visit unless they are siblings so it was nice he could come to the hospital.

Karen - posted on 03/01/2010

My kids are 11 1/2 months apart. When my second was born, my mom-in-law watched the 'older' one and that worked out great. I had my hubby with me for the time, and nana got plenty of time with the new baby after we brought him home. I am so thankful for her! Hope this helps

Erin - posted on 03/01/2010

I did have my older son at my delivery but I went into labor about a month and a half early. I was supposed to have my parents watch him but they ended up being the ones that drove me to the hospital because the dad was out with friends and I had a hard time reaching him, plus he was already in the town that the hospital was. So my son was there with my mom in the room for about two hours before they decided to do a c-section, and by that time the dad had finally made it so my mom took my son out to the hallway and walked around until they heard the outcome of the surgery and then she took him home to get some sleep. But I must say I liked him there it made me feel calmer because I didn't have to worry about him too lol... But the absolute hardest thing for me was being away from my oldest. I had to stay in the hospital for 3 days, and I had never spent the night away from him, and I cried myself to sleep everynight. I don't know if it was the hormones or what but I hated it! Of course it didn't help that my new baby was in the NICU so I couldn't be with him either :( But I would say that if he's allowed and you feel comfortable with him there during the beginning of labor where its not so bad and you know for sure you're having your baby I'd let him hang around because it's scary for him being away from momma too. And then you can send him to a babysitter for the end during the pushing and stuff. Plus if you went that route he wouldn't have to spend so much time with the babysitter either... I hope this helps you!

Sarah - posted on 02/28/2010

I did not have my son in the delivery room with me. I did not feel that was the place for him. I also did not want him to get scared. Labor is not always the most nicest or prettiest thing to watch. I also believe that the hospital does not allow little kids in the delivery room when you are delivering. Depending on the season (usually winter season) they don't allow children to visit while you are in the hospital due to the high likelihood of kids transporting diseases/germs. I had my sister come and stay for a few days around my due date (was lucky that that is when I went into labor). To this day my son remembers the fun time he had with my sister during that time. It was a true blessing!! They did their own special things and instead of him feeling that it was all about the baby he felt like he was special too. I think that would be great for your son and his grandpa to have that same experience. Make it a grandson/grandpa time!

Amanda - posted on 02/28/2010

another helful trick if your worried bout the older one being jelous is to buy a fav movie or toy for him and when he comes to see the new baby give it to him and say that the new baby got it for him

Stephanie - posted on 02/28/2010

I didn't have my daughters with us. They were 4 yrs old when our youngest was born, so they stayed with their friend.

I remember when my baby brother was born though. I was little, just barely two. Grama watched me at home. It was late, after bedtime and Mom and Dad drove up with my brother. :) He was so little.

Anyway, I don't remember anything about being worried or scared about being with Grama(my mom's mil) or about where Mommy was. :) I was getting a baby brother soon. I couldn't sleep, so I was peeking out my window waiting for them to drive up. :)



Most hospitals have rules about how old children must be to visit or even be in a labor room. Usually around 12 yrs old. So I'd make plans for him to somewhere else. Really it'd be better for him not to have his regular routine interrupted much if possible. and you're gonna want to focus on your new baby and know that he's safe and being taken care of well.