Options besides Cry it out

Vanessa - posted on 07/15/2009

I would say to hold her until she falls back to sleep, it is something they outgrow very quickly. I don't know why people are so against holding their babies or even letting them sleep in bed with them, it is nothing that last forever. They are only little once.

Heather - posted on 07/15/2009

Sometime babies just want the warmth of us. So you could use a hot watere bottle to place with her in the crib to give her the idea of your heat there. ( don't use reallyhot water, and make sure to wrap the bottle in a towel or something soft)

Melissa - posted on 07/14/2009

if it is teething.. there are teething tablets for babies that work great. There all natural and work much better than other meds. You could also try giving her a bottle that has rice cereal in it before she goes to sleep..my son slepted like a log when I tried that trick.lol..Hope this helps

Lena - posted on 07/13/2009

infant orajel along with tylenol works wonders on teething. poor little babies dont know why their mouths hurt

Bobbi - posted on 07/13/2009

I know what you are going thru and I can not let my baby cry it out. She is getting better but did the same thing I would just nurse her in the bed w me. I am all about co ed sleeping. She starts off in her bed every night and i do lay her down back in there now but if she is really fussy her butt is in my bed! Good Luck

Krista - posted on 07/13/2009

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate all the ideas and help. I have a hard time with the cry it out method and think that the lavender baths and music could help. I'll give those a shot.

Jessica - posted on 07/13/2009

My daughter did the same thing around that time....when she woke up I would give it about 15 minutes of her wimpering/crying cause sometimes she would fall back asleep. When she kept crying I would go in and get her, do the oragel or teething tablets (these are awesome...all natural, u can get them at target)! Then I would just rock her or lay on the couch with her for a bit and lay her back in her crib! Just know that it is from teething and it's a phase! I remember telling my husband that I felt like I had a newborn again! Key: do NOT take her into ur bed...otherwise you end up with a whole other set of issues and you'll be sleep with your daughter for along time in your bed mind you!

Natasha - posted on 07/13/2009

I do believe in crying it out. Although not strictly, I know when he really needs me and when he is just wanting attention. Its not just at bedtime, but during the day as well.

You can try:
1. lavender baths
2. some plain relief before bed, and when she wakes up (depending on the time frame) if you think its teething.
3. Classical Music
4. Co-Sleeping, found it really helped with my son when he was teething.

Whitney - posted on 07/12/2009

What worked for us is the lavender baby wash. Every night, we gave our son a bath in lavender soap and then used the lavender lotion. Put him in something comfy to sleep in with a warm bottle. Once we got him to sleep, which wasn't very hard (and once you try it you will understand bc you will want to go to bed too) he was out for the night except occasionally waking up for a feeding. Goodluck!

Vicki - posted on 07/12/2009

You’ve heard about it from friends, parents, and in-laws. You’ve seen it in Internet chat rooms and discussion boards:



“You’re so tired! You should put some cereal in your daughter’s bottle – then she’ll sleep through the night.”



“He’ll nap better.”



“Your son looks too skinny. You’re not feeding him enough. Add some cereal to the bottle – that’ll do the trick.”



“He still acts hungry? Try putting some cereal in the bottle. He’ll be much less fussy.”



“Spoon feeding is a hassle. Put it off as long as you can. Cereal in the bottle is quick, convenient, makes them sleep longer and cry less – what more could you want?”



Your pediatrician says this is not wise (except as a treatment for reflux). Dietitians and nutritionists concur. Introducing solids before 4 months might cause food allergies. Your well-wishers discount these recommendations because cereal in the bottle worked wonders for their children!



Throughout most of human history children were exclusively breast fed for the early months. During the previous generation or two, when bottle-feeding became very popular, rice cereal was often put into the bottle at a very early age. What were the results?



Most children seemed to thrive. A small number of children, though, did not tolerate the addition, because their sucking and swallowing actions were not yet fully coordinated. They inhaled small amounts of the rice cereal into their lungs, which led to pulmonary problems.



I’m much more concerned about a subtler issue. Babies are born with a wonderful mechanism for knowing how much food they need. During the early months, they take their cues from the volume of what they drink. Adding cereal derails this mechanism. It forces them to take in deceptively large amounts of calories. It teaches them to overeat.



By starting with a spoon, resting between bites, and stopping when your child lets you know he’s full, you will be laying an excellent foundation for good eating habits throughout his life.



A major study looking for the causes of obesity found that short-circuiting young children’s self-regulation of how much they eat is a major cause of later obesity.1 Cereal in the bottle does just that.



Babies that are fed this way may appear to be unaffected – but those few weeks of added convenience may result in a lifetime of struggles with weight. This common practice may have contributed to our being the most obese generation in history.



And it doesn’t even work. Scientists at the Cleveland Clinic studied the effect of cereal on sleep and found that adding the cereal did nothing at all to speed up the age of sleeping through the night. That first uninterrupted 6-hour stretch of sleep came no earlier in those who took cereal early.2



People swear otherwise. I suspect the reason is that kids do fall asleep a bit more quickly, and some babies may even go a bit longer between feedings. There is no scientific evidence, though, to support the claim that cereal in the bottle will help an infant increase total sleep or decrease crying.3



Drawing on the wisdom of experience and the latest scientific knowledge, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends against adding cereal to the bottle. It may be tempting after your 16th straight sleep-deprived night to cut a bigger hole in the feeding nipple to add rice cereal. But it won’t offer lasting help, and it may be giving your baby a lasting gift that both of you will regret.



Alan Greene MD FAAP



Reviewed by: Khanh-Van Le-Bucklin MD & Stephanie D’Augustine M.D.

Originally published: February 23, 2001

Last reviewed and updated: June 2008

Footnote References:



1Birch LL, Fisher JO, The causes and health consequences of obesity in children and adolescents: development of eating behaviors among children and adolescents. Pediatrics 1998 Mar; 101(3)

2Macknin ML, Medendorp SV, Maier MC, Infant sleep and bedtime cereal. Am J Dis Child 1989 Sep; 143(9):1066-8

3Hall RT, Infant feeding. Pediatr Rev - 2000 Jun; 21(6): 191-9.

Ashley - posted on 07/12/2009

Quoting Amber:

wow you've been really helpful my husband wanted me to use this method and hearing my daughter cry broke my heart... so i just keep going back in her room holding her hand until she calms down taht seems to wokr she crys still but i don't let her cry for long or get worked up.. (i'm trying to break her of my mistake of holding her until she falls sleep)

There is no such thing as holding your child being a "mistake". My three pieces of advice to any new parent is R-E-L-A-X it will flow if you let it, breastfeed, and embrace the "family bed".

Leilanie - posted on 07/12/2009

I also found that for the last bottle before going to be with a scoop of rice or mixed cereal works. I would do this for my older daughter when she wasn't sleeping through the night and it worked. Also rub the tylenol on her gums before she goes to sleep becuase the teething part is very painful

Jenna - posted on 07/12/2009

There are many options, which one will work is up to your baby. Here are a few suggestions:

1. Play classical music
2. Play nature sounds
3. Read a book to her for 15 - 30 minutes. Not a kids book, but something imaginative. Its mostly the sound of your voice that is soothing, but even babies will develop a strong imagination at a young age.
4. If she is still taking a bottle, put some Rice Cereal in her nighttime bottle. You can find this in any baby isle. You will need a special nipple for it, either cut a small X in the nipple or use a fast flow nipple depending on her level of suction. Make sure the bottle is warm.

Hope this helps!

Jenna - posted on 07/12/2009

There are many options, which one will work is up to your baby. Here are a few suggestions:

1. Play classical music
2. Play nature sounds
3. Read a book to her for 15 - 30 minutes. Not a kids book, but something imaginative. Its mostly the sound of your voice that is soothing, but even babies will develop a strong imagination at a young age.
4. If she is still taking a bottle, put some Rice Cereal in her nighttime bottle. You can find this in any baby isle. You will need a special nipple for it, either cut a small X in the nipple or use a fast flow nipple depending on her level of suction. Make sure the bottle is warm.

Hope this helps!

Brenda - posted on 07/12/2009

Teething and growth spurt. Are you nursing or bottle feeding? Either way during growth spurts cause increased sucking. The reason is that breastmilk contains a hormone that reduces the pain of growthing, and whether or not they are on breastmilk, they wake to nurse more often. Also, the pain of growth/teething increases the need for comforting. Bring her into the bed with you and she will feel more comfortable and sleep longer, or if you are uncomfortable with that, move her bed beside your bed if you can. When I could not co sleep with my older son, I would feed him to sleep then transfer him to the crib, which I had beside the bed. No matter what you do, waking is common at this age. Growth and other issues will make them wake more requently. Comfort is a very real need at this age. Remember, infants receive up to twenty five percent of their nutrients at night. Waking also protects infants at any age from SIDS risk because they don't enter long periods of deep sleep.



I don't believe in cry it out, or even ferber method for that matter, because it is a type of cry it out. But to those that wish to do CIO, Ferber's method is the most gentle and least damaging to the infant. (This is just my opinion that is based on my background in psychology, but CIO and methods that allow the baby to scream cause undue stress. This causes strain on the circulatory system and induces emotional distress. The premise does work, as most will tell you, but the reason is the infant gives up on being responded to.)



I suggest Dr. Sears' The Baby Book or The No Cry Sleep Solution if you wish to read some things others who have had work out. If you don't want to buy a book, check out attachmentparenting.org for sleep solutions or askdrsears.com for sleep solutions as well. Good luck, and know it will pass.

Amber - posted on 07/12/2009

wow you've been really helpful my husband wanted me to use this method and hearing my daughter cry broke my heart... so i just keep going back in her room holding her hand until she calms down taht seems to wokr she crys still but i don't let her cry for long or get worked up.. (i'm trying to break her of my mistake of holding her until she falls sleep)

Ashley - posted on 07/12/2009

The fact is that “crying it out” simply does not work the way proponents of the Ferber method believe. An infant has not the faculties to cry hysterically, get it out of his system, and then lull into slumber. No, he has merely submitted into exhaustion once it becomes clear that his caretakers are not coming to help him. In the mean time, his blood pressure and heart rate have soared excessively and needlessly because no one has opted to comfort him. Babies need physical comfort, especially from their mothers. It should be noted that Dr. Ferber, the king of “Cry It Out” has since revised his famous works to include an alternative method. That’s right, the inventor of Ferber-ization (sleep training through crying it out), HAS REALIZED HE WAS WRONG.



A recent Harvard study shows that children who are left to cry themselves to sleep suffer long-lasting damage to their nervous system. As a result, they are more susceptible to post traumatic stress and anxiety disorders, including panic attacks. Responding to your baby’s cues when he cries does not spoil a child and it does not mean he will never sleep soundly on his own. In fact, a child who is comforted and nurtured will become more independent and healthy sleepers later because they know they have a dependable support system waiting for them when they wake up.

Kirsten - posted on 07/12/2009

Have you started her on solid foods yet? If not, maybe she is waking up more often because she is hungry and sometimes solid foods can fix this problem but not always. Also, do you nurse/bottlefeed everytime she wakes up? If so, then maybe try only feeding every other time she wakes up. These are the things that I did with my son when he turned 6 months old and started waking more often at night, unfortunately we only had a limited amount on success with these two methods. Good luck!

Alecia - posted on 07/12/2009

Our just 6 month old son has always seemed to have a 1-2 hour wake cycle, and through lots of effort with different methods over the past 6 weeks or so, we have finally gotten him down to typically only crying for us 2 times a night (still not awesome, but a lot better than 6 times or more!) What worked for us does involve allowing some crying in an attempt to teach self-soothing, but not a full blown cry it out method. If you're interested, let me know & I'll give you more details. This was never necessary with our first son as he's always been a great sleeper, so even as 2nd time parents, we're just figuring this one out too!

Laura - posted on 07/12/2009

If you think teething might be a part of it, you could try a dose or half a dose of tylenol or another pain reliever as that can really be painful for them. We did the ferberizing once our son was 7 months old but prior to that he was in our bed so I haven't got any suggestions for you there... Ferberizing took 3 days, though, and was well worth it for him and for us!