Please help, my 9 month old wont stay asleep at night

Brittney - posted on 03/29/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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HELP...my son is almost 9 months old, and he is still not sleeping through the night. He was still eating during the night until last week when i wheened him from that. He has never slept through the night. Now that he is not eating there is no reason for him to be awake. He has a great bedtime routine and puts himself to sleep every night without a fight. He stirs some in the first few hours and crys a little and puts himself back to sleep. We still do a 10pm feeding and after that its all downhill. He is up at 130 and i try letting him cry , he crys for an hour, then i go and get him and it takes an hour to get him back down. Then he is up again at 430-5. And it takes a while to get him back down. ultimatley yes i am losing sleep, but he is losing sleep that is more important than me. I dont know what else to do. The cry it out is not working. please help

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Ivana - posted on 03/29/2010

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if its only been a week that he hasn't been eating at night - he still probably needs time to adjust to not feeding in the middle of the night...
were you cosleeping with him when he was feeding during the night or would you just go to him when he awoke for a feed?

I'm personally against crying it out...
if he's able to put himself to sleep just fine at bedtime, why not just go to him when he cries in the middle of the night and put your hand on his chest lightly and do a bit of "shhhhh shhhh shhhh"ing.. that way he would be reassured that you are there and everything is OK. He's probably just used to seeing you in the night, so even though he isn't feeding - he's still waking up out of habit and from expecting that you'd be there.

I would try to soothe him back to sleep, let him know you're there quietly and softly and keep coming back to affirm that to him when he cries. If his cries are persistant, pick him up, rock him a little then put him back down. Repeat this for a few nights and he might get used to the situation and no longer wake in the middle of the night...

are you against paci's ? or does he just not accept them?

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Ivana - posted on 04/03/2010

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I read somewhere that it helps if dad gets up instead of mum!!!! Mum means food, dad can't help with that.



Any change takes at least 2 weeks, so give it some time, it will come right!!!!

Maria - posted on 04/02/2010

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i never really had a lot of issues with my son when bed time came around.i pretty much kept it busy when he was awake, not taking a nap, like going for walks/shopping, playing with him... that way he would get really tired when night time came around, i would feed him and he would go to sleep. is he eating food? may be he is not eating enough to stay full and to sleep a full night. my son did the same though for not to long. but it was my fault because he would start crying after i would lay him down, and i would go in there right away to see if he was okay. i didn't get to me until a week or so when i realized he was kinda doing it on purposed. he knew that if he were to start crying i would ran in there and make sure he was okay and picked him up. that is when i stopped doing that, when i noticed that he would start crying i didnt go in his room i would let him cry a little and eventually he would go back to sleep. it took a little while but after a month or so he started sleepin a full night, and he has ever since. of course it did hurt me a little to leave him crying like that but it was for his own good and mine.

Kimberly - posted on 04/02/2010

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my guy is almost 14 mos & has never slept through the night...hes up every 2-3 hours to nurse. he likely will be as long as i breastfeed. there really is no hurry for them to sleep through the night. my opinion....althoug not everyones, is not to let them cry...they dont have the ability to self sooth in a healty way at this age. even if he isnt eating i let my guy nurse and he is back to sleep within seconds. i suggest doing whatever works to get him and u back to sleep as quickly as possible. dont worry about him slleping through the night...he will when hes ready

Kayla - posted on 04/02/2010

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feed him right before bed and change his diaper keep him up as much as possible during the day and wear him out that works for my kids:]

Crystal - posted on 03/29/2010

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Hi Brittney! Sorry to hear you're having issues with the bedtime routine, but I can completely relate.My son didn't sleep through the night until he was a year old. Theres a few things that I found helped me! You say that he is still waking up for 10pm feedings? Is he on breastmilk/breastfeeding or are you introducing solids/cereal? I found that instead of feeding just the breast milk/formula before bedtime, feeding a small amount of cereal with the breastmilk helped to keep him alseep. It keeps them fuller longer. Also, when you do do the night time feedings, make sure the lights are kept off/dimmed and you dont talk to him during those times. It sounds somewhat "cruel" to some to not interact with your child when feeding is such a part of bonding for a parent and child, however, the less interaction that stimulates him during these feedings will ensure that he stays in the "sleepy" mode and falls back to sleep easier. I would try to lessen naps during the day if he is taking those. If he takes naps, make them shorter naps, maybe have more activities during the day to tire him? What time is he going to sleep at night? It might be too early of a bedtime, and he's getting enough sleep otherwise, hence why its hard for him to fall back asleep, hes simply not tired. I agree with one of the other moms with gently placing your hand over his back.....soothing him to reassure you're there, just make sure to interact as little as possible. This may cause him to be more alert if you try to talk to him. Also, another thing to try is maybe he is too warm? Strip him down to a onesie or something lighter? Is he congested at all when he wakes? Is he crying out of pain or just wimpering? Check for tags on clothing. My kids HATED feeling those tags on the clothing and often would get irritated from feeling them poke. Hope some of these suggestions help you!

Brittney - posted on 03/29/2010

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he is breastfed, and is doing fine with not eating at night now...hes ok with that....he is on solids and has been since 4 months....and will not sleep with a paci

Ivana - posted on 03/29/2010

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first, a few questions:



is he breastfed, or formula fed?

is he eating solids?

does he use a soother/paci?

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