please tell me I'm not out of my mind lol

Sarah - posted on 03/15/2011 ( 18 moms have responded )

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My husband and I had a huge fight a couple nights ago. We both use facebook and he plays Mafia Wars and has recently friended a bunch of people that neither of us know, they're not even friends of friends, so he could complete some task in the game. I had a huge problem with it because we both of a ton of pictures of our daughter on our profiles. I told him he either needed to unfriend these people or fix his profile so that only certain people can see the pictures of our daughter because God only knows who these people are and one of them could be some pedofile diddling himself to pictures of my baby. He said I was out of mind and being way too over protective because if someone really wants to see pictures on our profile they'll find a way to do it. I told him that was true but I'm not HELPING them do it since I am very careful who I friend on facebook, I don't have any pictures of my daughter on here even. He changed his profile and made it so that only certain people can see the pictures but he did it to shut me up and he still thinks I'm out of my mind. So from mom to mom...am I crazy to object so much to people neither of us knows being able to look at pictures of our daughter? Or was I completely justified in being so upset? I'd love to know what other moms think.

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Nicole - posted on 03/18/2011

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yes and no. i was the same exact way. but i got over. my daughter is a year old. but i will admit i am careful about WHAT she is wearing in the posts i pick and what "poses" she is in. and my profiles are private i do not add people i do not know. i did make that same threat to my SO.

i told him he either had to make his facebook private or make the album with her pictures in it friends only. so the album became friends only. he too thought i was crazy and said the same things your SO said and i said pretty much the same things you said. but i post my daughters pics in certain areas cause i have family across the country and some of them are not facebook users. i do post to online albums cause remembering what i sent to what family member is frustrating. this way i send one link and they can see her photos. now the online album is not the most secure so my family does not have to be members of the site to view. but their selection is limited and no cute messy half naked food covered baby photos. if they wanna see her cute and covered in food they have to visit me.

Meagan - posted on 03/18/2011

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i think you are completly justified, my father in law works for a news channel and he thought it would be nice to include my sons photo in a comercial without speaking to me or my husband; I flipped out! You never know who is watching, looking or doing things they shouldnt. My husband thought I was nuts but he sided with me and told his father to remove the comercial. We are the parents and we must do everything we can to protect our children

Laura - posted on 03/18/2011

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I don't know if I would have felt any differently. I am very particular about who meets my children in person and on facebook. I have a very limited profile and I'm on friends with people I know (and not even all of them are permitted to see my pictures). I think as a parent, it's our job to protect our children for as long as possible. You wouldn't invite a stranger into your home to meet your child, so why would you do the equivalent on the internet??

Charlotte - posted on 03/18/2011

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Me and my man are on FB too, our kids are on our profiles and we have both got ppl on our friends lists who we don't know because of games. I don't much care who they are as they don't know where we live so they can't do me or my kids any harm and I have never had any probs from any of them. And when you think about it, I very much doubt theses ppl look at every profile searching for photos of kids. Generally speaking paedophiles prefer chat rooms or things directly linked to kids etc not Zynga games!

Tah - posted on 03/17/2011

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o good, now i feel okay telling you this...NO..you are not crazy..you have every right to feel that way...

Sharon - posted on 03/17/2011

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I don't even have a Facebook account and have asked that my family and friends not go posting pictures of my daughter on their sites. I do not know if they are respecting my wishes as I cannot and do not wish to be involved with social networking, but I think your request is perfectly reasonable.

Tray - posted on 03/17/2011

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id do the same thing but my husband and i have both made it so only our friends can see pics of our children for that very reason so no you're not out of your mind for saying so you have every right to protect your children.

Beth - posted on 03/17/2011

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you're out of your mind and your justified. we have to be a little paranoid and mistrustful to keep our kids safe

Lin - posted on 03/16/2011

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As someone who has people she doesn't know IRL on her FB for the purpose of playing games, you're not out of your mind for it. I hide my kids' photos for that very reason.

Bonnie - posted on 03/16/2011

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You're completely justified in asking your husband to change his security settings! I have very few photos of my son on FB & I only have people I trust on my friends list.
If you have any family or friends with an older son, ask your husband what he'd do if, hypothetically, he found out they were abusing your daughter... It'll bring it closer to home & he'll probably understand your concerns a little better.

Teresa - posted on 03/16/2011

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Def Justified. i sure would not want someone, possibly a perv, looking at pics of my little girl. Us moms are always the protective ones, the men are too laid back about things sometimes

Erin - posted on 03/16/2011

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I agree with you i wouldn't want someone the myself or my parnter didn't know looking at pictures of my kids my parnter doesn't have any pictures of the kids on his facebook acc for this very reason

Michelle - posted on 03/16/2011

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well I added friends when i used to play farmville and they are still on my list my pics are for family only but my profile pic people can see and ive got one pic of my son on here Anyway i think "facebook" games took to much time out of my day/night so i gave up on them I'm really not sure on this one aye...

April - posted on 03/16/2011

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LOL you sound like me. I'm anal about who adds my husband or i on FB. So we only add people we know. It's creepy letting randoms look at your pictures (my children, even pictures of myself). I hate it. My husband thinks i'm overly sensitive about it but he listens to me anyway because well... everyone knows the wife wears the pants in the family. LOL just kidding :D

Ashleigh Jade - posted on 03/16/2011

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I think your justified, i dont have pictures of my children on here so i understand. Its a mothers instinct to protect our children.

Kristen - posted on 03/15/2011

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I think you were justified. I'm the same way with my Facebook, my husband and I only add people I know, and I have asked my family to set any pictures of her to where not everyone can see them. I know how you feel, I do not want anyone that I don't know having access to pictures of my daughter, it's creepy.

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