Question for non-breastfeeding mums

*Lisa* - posted on 05/08/2010 ( 102 moms have responded )

1,858

12

174

This is a question for non-breast feeding mums. No judgements, just purely for interest purposes. Why were your reasons for not breast feeding?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Krystal - posted on 05/10/2010

2

1

0

Oh and to the poster above me...who are you to say anyones reasons are not valid or are "lazy"? We all have our reasons for not doing it and no one needs to be made to feel bad about it. The original post says "no judgments" so let's keep it that way, mmmkay?

Nicole - posted on 05/12/2010

112

30

0

With my first baby I was so stressed out from trying to breast feed that I stopped producing enough milk and with my second baby he had a lot of trouble with latching on so I started to pump but again I stopped producing enough milk to give him. If I would have been able to breast feed I would have.

Danielle - posted on 05/12/2010

89

8

13

I breast fed for the first month, and then pumped for a month after. But it was hell for me. I hated every second of breastfeeding and was beginning to resent my daughter. On top of all the guilt I felt for hating breastfeeding, being frustrated at my daughter; I had all my friends telling me how good moms breastfeed. In the end the weight of it all was to much, I broke down, and my husband had to comfort my sobbing self for hours. After that I put the pump away, and we broke out the bottles. Now I'm the happiest I have ever been!

Kris - posted on 05/12/2010

21

13

0

Wow...Cassandra Hopper...take your rude and judgemental comments elsewhere.
I breastfed my 2 kids, but I support every mom for making their own choices based on what works for their family.

Amanda - posted on 05/11/2010

22

41

2

I don't understand why women are so cruel to one another. I am a breast feeding mom; 2nd time around, I had problems getting my milk to come in, latch problems, it's been tough. I also had both my babies by c-section; my son by emergency my daughter by choice. I'm a stay at home mom, because I want to be and as long as we can afford and I'm still sane (haha) I will continue o be one. I have read, and heard, so many nasty remarks from other moms about the choices we make for pourselves and our families. I've been asked why I didn't have my kids "naturally" or even "the right way", I've been scolded for bfing and for using formula, and some even more hurtful things have been said abut being a working mom, now people judge me harshly for staying home.Well, how about we all mind our business and remember that we all live in glass houses. Isn't this forum to encourage and help one another? We all work hard to be the best parent we can in the way thats best for each of us. My way wouldn't work for anyone else, and noone's way would work for my family. To be honest, I don't think bottle feeding moms are lazy, it's a lot of work to get up at 4am and make a bottle instead of popping a boob out and going back to sleep! I'm too lazy! lol

This conversation has been closed to further comments

102 Comments

View replies by

*Lisa* - posted on 05/12/2010

1,858

12

174

Thanks for sharing your stories ladies. You are all great mums doing what's best for you and your families. I wasn't asking for judgmental comments from other mums, I was hoping to give a chance for people to see that everyone's experience is different. Thanks for sharing yours :)

Christine - posted on 05/12/2010

39

33

1

I had twins, I breastfed them with supplements untill they were 3 weeks and then continued pumping and supplementing till they were 6 weeks and then I just couldn't do it anymore, I was completely exhausted and could not keep up with them. My kids have eaten a lot from the beginning. They were born at just under 6lbs each and are now 5 months and weigh over 17lbs each and are very healthy, there recent peds apt said they are doing awesome!! I really wanted to breastfeed and make it work but I couldn't for the sake of my sanity.

Claire - posted on 05/12/2010

1

3

0

I chose not to breast feed because I know myself and my limitations, breast feeding as an option, did not appeal to me.

Amanda - posted on 05/12/2010

12

25

0

My first one I didn't breastfeed because I was 22 and ewwwww. I just didn't want to and since there's no difference between breast/bottle babies it wasn't that big of deal for me. Plus my mother-in-law really wanted me too and since I was young and immature I didn't do it b/c she wanted me too...silly, I know. I and my two brothers were not breast-fed and we all turned out perfectly fine! My last two babies I did breast feed. It's funny b/c everyone claims that the later is so much better for your babies with immunizations and all (which I'm sure is true to a small extent) and my bottle-fed kid doesn't get near the sicknesses that my last breast-fed baby gets! They make formula so wonderful that honestly, it really doesn't matter. It's all become way too political for me...kind of like going green, and home births, organic stuff, and that co-sleeping with kids things! blah. That's why I quit reading those Parenting magz years ago. Anyhow, hope that helps coming from someone who has done both!

Veronique - posted on 05/12/2010

389

17

21

I did breast feed my 1st for 8 weeks but mix. Meaning breast in the day and formula at night. My second it was breast for 4 weeks straight then i put her on formula. I tried my best but i wasn't producing enough milk for both my girls. And i just couldn't take being tied down all day with my baby attache to my breast. I found formula work better for me.

QUANI - posted on 05/12/2010

15

88

1

I ACTUALLY HAD ECLAMPSIA AND AFTER I LET HE HOSPITAL...I WAS BREASTFEEDING HOWEVER I WAS URGED TO STOP BECAUSE OF ALL THE TRAUMA GOING ON WITH MY BODY...

Katie - posted on 05/12/2010

265

5

21

Call me lazy or selfish but my daughter was a month early and I had problems getting her to latch on. I was a first time mom and I tried and tried and had to give up because it was too stressful for both of us. I really wanted to do it though.

If a woman doesn't want to breastfeed then nobody should put her down and call her lazy its a choice just like abortions and giving your kid a pacifier and letting them cry it out or spanking or giving them a bottle at 2 all choices we have to make, I'm not saying I agree with all of them I'm just saying you shouldn't put someone down for agreeing or making some of those choices.

[deleted account]

dear Cassandra Hopper ...so what if i am lazy and selfish lots of people have children it doesnt mean they are all super moms like you

Sara - posted on 05/12/2010

79

2

10

I started breastfeeding in the hospital. She was only able to pull from my left breast and not my right. She latched perfectly, just couldn't get anything from it. She would try for over half an hour at times and still be crying for food and finish four ounces of formula. I couldn't feed her on just my left so I switched to formula.

Melissa - posted on 05/12/2010

11

35

0

i wanted to breastfeed until atleats 6months old but i had to stop at 3months and completely ween him off. theres nothing wrong with bottle feeding and i had to do it coz i have to sart work to help us with bills.

a girl i know stopped breastfeeding when her child was 2 days old becasue she didnt like her nipples hurting.

Karen - posted on 05/12/2010

1,577

26

372

i am self employed and don't get mat leave benefits (was home from hospital friday and back to work monday)...because of this i knew that i did not have the time to committ to nursing or pumping the amount that i would need. on that note, my son is happy and healthy on his formula. my son is able to be with me at work because of me being self employed so i can attend to him and spend time with him i just couldn't work it to find enough time to sit and nurse/pump when i needed to

Letitia - posted on 05/12/2010

94

20

2

My daughter was all ways gonna go on formular i dont like the idear of breast feeding and she is perfectly fine, i serioucly dont get the fuss about breast feeding Xx

Kristy - posted on 05/12/2010

66

21

0

I breastfed for 6weeks untill my daughter starting pooing blood from being intolerant to protien, so I had to put her on medicated formula.

Naomi - posted on 05/12/2010

9

9

1

We tried breastfeeding for two months (approx) but my daughter lost weight, and I was told by our doctor to try supplement feeds, so she had both breast and bottle for a few weeks, and she still wasn't putting on weight so in the end she had to be completely formula fed. : (

Sarai - posted on 05/12/2010

5

9

0

My daughter was born with a tongue tie, which made it very hard for her to latch on. I needed to wait till she was 2 weeks old to have it snipped so in the mean time I was express as much as I could (my supply was low) and tried to breastfeed once a day so she would still remember how but it just didn't work.

In the end I was trying to express, breastfeed, steralize bottles and buying formula. In the end my milk supply suffered and I was having to top up after each feed with formula. It was stressing me out so much in the end I just decided less stress is better for us and just went with formula all the time. She is fine and healthy for it. Next baby I will try breast again but won;t be so upset if I need to use formula as well.

There is way too much pressure now days on women to breastfeed. Not all of us can!.

[deleted account]

My baby wouldn't latch! While still at the hospital, I had about 10 nurses all together try and help with getting my baby to latch with no luck at all. They gave me a nipple shield and she sorta was able to suck a bit better with that but not well enough to staisfy her hunger. I pumped for 2 months and then my milk supply all of a sudden dropped drastically so I had to switch to formula. I was not planning on bottle feeding at all! I was very against the idea of ever giving her a bottle and planned on breast-feeding for a year. Some things you just don't have control of!

Theresa - posted on 05/12/2010

8

10

0

I was breast feeding my son and then I got milk fever, after that my milk just dried up and I was unable to feed him so I had to go for formula! The same happened when I had my daughter!
And people who say that you don't bond as much with your baby are talking bull, I bonded very well with both of my kids!

Lindsey - posted on 05/11/2010

9

13

0

I tried very hard to breast feed but when it came down to it I was trapped; every time we went somewhere I had to find a secluded place to feed, and it really kind of disrupted our life and daddy could not be a part of it. Also I did not produce enough milk to keep up with his needs, my left boob was a C cup and my right was a very small B when they were full.

Brittany - posted on 05/11/2010

4

9

0

The hospital nipple confused my son. Then after that he would not latch on so I had no choice but to bottle fed.

[deleted account]

she wouldnt latch so I started to pump and had to supplement with formula because she lost too much weight. I ended up losing my supply after 6 weeks up pumping.

Amanda - posted on 05/11/2010

218

8

24

My baby girl just couldn`t get a good latch so I pump. At 5 months my milk started to dry up so now I`m on domperidone so I can pump. I still need to supplement with formula, usually about two cans every month.

Christina - posted on 05/11/2010

90

48

3

My twins were 9 weeks premature, in the hospital for 4-5 weeks, and had a poor suckle. They were still so tiny and I was just too big to fit in their mouth to where they could get a good latch. I did pump for them for about 2 months, then my milk dried up. Breastfed my other twins (they were full term) for 5 months (milk dried up then found out I was pregnant again) before I put them on the bottle. My oldest (singleton prengancy) was soley breastfed for 7 months. She weened herself so I put her on regular milk because she wouldn't drink formula.

Michelle - posted on 05/11/2010

5

41

1

I wanted to breastfeed...that was the plan. My baby was born and because of all of the meds that I was on for preeclampsia, she was taken to the NICU pretty much right away. They started bottle feeding her before I could get down to even try to breastfeed and once I was able to get there, she would not latch on :(

[deleted account]

i started out breast feeding with my first child and from the start he had trouble latching on and after 3 months of still not latching on right and i was in so much pain. i had a lot of help from many many women in groups and moms i knew who were breast feeding i couldn't do it any more so i went to pumping until i had nothing left i was pumping less that 4 oz every 4 hours and my baby was eating way more than that so that is when i made the big switch to formula. then with my 2nd child i started breastfeeding and ended at 3 months because he was just not getting enough and i was always filling in with formula and pretty soon he was on formula for good. so i gave it a good try i think but if i have another baby i know i will try it again. i just wish that i could of had a good pump all that i had was the manual one from years ago when my aunt had her kids so maybe i can afford a good one next time. every attempt to try is different so maybe with my next it will work the way i want it to.

Candace - posted on 05/11/2010

3

24

0

I stopped after a month. I got put back on iron pills. Which in turn was messing up my sons stomach.

Christina - posted on 05/11/2010

21

35

0

I started supplementing at 6 weeks and stopped completely at 9 weeks. My daughter couldn't latch and was loosing weight. I wish I could of had the experience and breastfed longer but it just wasn't healthy for her.

[deleted account]

I tried too but my son could not latch on and I did not like the idea of having to pump every 2 hours..My Dr told me I would have to do that in order to produce enough milk for him.

Stephanie - posted on 05/11/2010

1

4

0

Numerous reasons. My daughter had a weak suck. She worked hard for 45 minutes and only got 1 ounce. She was burning more calories than taking in- therefore, not gaining any weight. We supplemented formula, and noticed she had less gas and less spit up with formula. It was hard to do, but it was best for my daughter- I had to accept that.

Felisha - posted on 05/11/2010

5

12

0

i tried but after a few weeks I wasn't producing enough milk because I had no appetite and wasn't eating enough. We also determined that my son needed soy formula to keep from getting sick.

Danielle - posted on 05/11/2010

16

74

1

My goal was to breastfeed for the first year of my child's life and then move him straight to vitamin D, unfortunately I was unable to. My son, did what they called the barracuda, and needless to say that breastfeeding was so painful that I would involuntarily be crying and my nipples began to bleed. I would latch him properly, but he would then redo the latching on his own and it was very very painful. I took it really hard when my son went to formula, I literally cried on and off for a few days and was very sensitive about the topic, but as time went on, I found that not everyone was breastfeeding and that it wasn't a big deal that he was on formula. He was also getting some nutrients from the formula that my breast milk would not have provided.

Ayla - posted on 05/11/2010

78

16

8

My daughter was wisked away to he NICU after being born, after two days with nothing to eat only a sugar drip she was to lazy to latch on, I ended up pumping for 2.5 months but just wasnt getting enough milk (only 1-2oz every 3 hours) so we just stuck with formula

Kerri - posted on 05/11/2010

104

21

8

I tried breast feeding my first and at 3 weeks i woke up to feed her and she was getting nothing i tried to pump and could only get 1/2 an oz so started her on formula. I had no intentions in breastfeeding my 2nd because my oldest daughter was only 18 months and i knew it was so time consuming i was worried that i would not get to spend as much time with my oldest if i had. But i do regret the choice not doing so at times i loved the bonding experience with my first. My youngest also has skin rash from formula so we have to use Nutramigen which is sooo expensive so i often wonder if i would have breast fed would it have prevented this?!

Julia - posted on 05/11/2010

33

37

0

Hello!!
I tried from the start breastfeeding.but i lost alot of blood giving birth and i was very weak. so on the second day both me and baby was frustrated and couldnt take to it so I had no choice but to switch to bottle!

Suzannah - posted on 05/11/2010

11

35

0

I couldn't get my baby to latch on at all so I started pumping. She is 9 months 5 days old and I am still pumping 3 times a day!! I want her to have my breast milk for the first year of her life. She has also been using formula and eating baby food. I would say right now she gets about 16oz of my milk a day. To pump everyday takes lots of dedication...its so time consuming. If your milk supply is low, buy some milk thistle. I take it twice a day and have an abundant amount of milk. It isn't harmful for your baby either.

Tamika - posted on 05/11/2010

259

49

4

I was not breast feed but my sister was. Seeing it tramatized me. My sisters suckle was so strong she tore my mothers nipples. Also ecsema runs in our family. I had it as i got older it became better and i flare up in the winter only now. My sister on the other hand has the most extream case of escema our pediatrician had ever saw at that time now as an adult she still has to see the derm twice a year and she flares up all year round all over her body. I never had to go to the derm for mine and it was only on my forehead elbow creases and behind the knees. Her pediatrician said the breastfeeding is most likely what made the difference. Yes u pass on good stuff but the bad must pass through also. I felt so bad for myself and my sister growing up. We both had a hard time in school because of the scars. But my sister was in pain while just iched. I could not risk doing that to my childen, my mother didnt know. As far as all the statistics on inteligence and eye function and obesity. My IQ is 15 points higher than my sisters. She strugles to keep off that extra 20 pounds, where as, the last time I worked out on a regular was in high school and i have had to children since then and I still wear the clothes I had in high school. I have never needed glasses and my sister is blind as a bat without hers. I personally dont think it makes a difference, nowadays the baby formula is actually better than breastmilk. At leats with a bottle u know without a doubt ur child is getting enough. I have heard of plenty of babies that were malnurished because the mothers milk supply was not enough. I had my first child at 19, but I was a doctor nightmare because I did my research on everything. I will say though there is somthing to be said about the bond that is made through breastfeeding. But if it is a choice between a stronge bond and a child that is iching and in pain ill pass. I will stop my life for my children and they know it.

Christina - posted on 05/11/2010

172

25

5

I have 3 children, 2 boys one 4yrs the other 6 months, and a girl. My daughter loved to breastfeed. We couldn't get her to take a bottle for nothing. However, both of my sons didn't take to it to well. I would rotate what they got a each feeding, one feeding being breast fed the next feeding bottle fed with formula. Both of my sons preferred the bottle over the breast so I gave up. Plus when my second son was born, he was born via emergency c-section so we gave him bottles in the hospital and didn't try to breastfeed until we were released and by that time, he really preferred bottle to breast.

Leanne - posted on 05/11/2010

36

21

0

I tried in the hospital but he only latched on once without help from midwife and he wasnt interested in the breast so rather than stress him out and me i tried a bottle in hospital and he took it all straight away and was much happier and so was i it just wasnt for us i guess but i would try again if i have more children

Leona - posted on 05/11/2010

72

5

4

i tried breastfeeding 4 a month but i got an infection and could no longer handle it.

Charlotte - posted on 05/11/2010

134

38

2

Couldn't keep up with my babys appetite and felt too much pressure to express what seemed like so much milk. Got so bad that most of the time while expressing or trying to get her to latch, I was crying my eyes out.

Katie - posted on 05/11/2010

30

20

4

I started out breastfeeding, but I went through post partum depression and they had to treat me with a anti-depressant for a few weeks, and i couldn't pump my milk anymore because of the pills would go through milk and before i could be taken off, my milk dried up. so I moved to bottle, I hated it though I felt guilty but my daughter did get two weeks of me feeding her breastmilk, but I had to do what was best for me and that was get my hormones in check, so I could be a good mom, and thankfully she switched over to formula with just a few issues, made her alittle gassy but she's doing well now.

Christine - posted on 05/11/2010

3

5

1

My first daughter had a sensitivity to milk and had to use soy. She would have acid reflux and severe gas. My other daughter refused to latch on. I saw a specialist, with no luck.

Trina - posted on 05/11/2010

291

18

16

Just in case anyone is wondering there are resources out there if you want to breastfeed, or even relactate and you are having problems. La Leche League International is a group of women, and many have tons of experience with issues like other have had here. A book about medications and breastfeeding is the Hale's Manual. Kellymom.com has loads of breastfeeding information, and even WHO. Just remember that a bad nursing experience does not mean you can't try again with future children (if you want to). I just want to put that information out there. Also a Board Certified Lactation Consultant is a great step to getting help if you need it, and if you can afford it you can buy banked breastmilk (the mothers are screened for diseases usually with these). As well as this there are nursing supplementation systems called SNS. One name brand of these is the Lact_aid for supplementing a baby while you nurse so that your body is still getting the stimulation (it can help to build your supply while you are fighting supply issues). The reason I know all of this is because I have done all of this when I had my own nursing problems. Just want to throw the info out there...just in case.

Hannah - posted on 05/11/2010

15

24

0

i breastfeed for two weeks but my son started to loose weight and we ended up in hospital again my milk dried up over night and i had to put him onto formula so he would put on weight.

Racheal - posted on 05/11/2010

11

15

1

my son never latched, apparently i wasnt properly equipped... I did the pumping for about a month but all i was doing was pumping and feeding so I eventually stopped. Hes 3 now and healthy smart plump and happy :) I had a bit of depression over it but hes just fine :)

Samantha - posted on 05/11/2010

34

16

2

i tried to breast feed my first two children but they wouldnt latch on and my milk wasnt coming in that well at all so with my third child i saved myself the aggravation and started her on formula right away

Kim - posted on 05/11/2010

19

31

2

I breastfed for 5 days, but was then admitted to hospital with septecemia and was in ICU for 2 weeks, i was too weak to have my son with me and was on too many medications. My son has grown up to be perfectly healthy and developing faster than his breastfed baby friends, so i dont have a problem with giving up breast feeding (although at the time i really beat myself up over it)

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms