Stay at home mom with a lot of time but nothing to do

Meghan - posted on 05/14/2010 ( 11 moms have responded )

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Im a stay at home mom and i love it but its the same routine every day. I love my son and staying at home but i feel like im pawning him off on people if i ask them to watch him while i take a run. I see it as being selfish honestly. Now it seems like im always mad and im not that kind of person. Not to mention we live with the in-laws and i dont have any kind of privacy. Any advice on how to get myself ok with people watching him or things to do to make my days more interesting?

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Anna Marie - posted on 05/14/2010

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the key is to find things that are child friendly to do so that you can have something to look forward to doing without feeling guilty also you'll feel more independent not depending on anyone to let you go! also if you live with inlaws try to make the most of things maybe you could catch a movie or something at night time when your son is asleep and let them mind him they prob won't mind if theyre goin to be there anyway and you won't have to feel to guilty if hes already asleep! try letting your other half take over sometimes even if its only to have a long relaxing bath or read a book and the more often he takes over the easier it will be for both of you!!! hope some of this helps GOOD LUCK!!

Charmaine - posted on 05/14/2010

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I do the same thing, I don't like leaving my son with anyone even his dad teeheehee.... but when i go for a run I take him with me (i have a jogging stroller) and we do activities throughout the day, like go to the pool or the park or go visit people. I also join mom groups and go to the meet ups and to the library for baby talk and all that fun stuff... if i'm bored at home I pack my son up and we go for a walk. I usually only leave him with my mom if i go out with my friends for dinner and drinks or something, but i am always home by midnight and I barely ever leave him with a sitter. he loves being outside and around other kids ... i get mad to and sometimes i dont know why but if i go out side i feel better... i hate being stuck in a house i go mad crazy!!

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Kristy - posted on 05/18/2010

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i also stay at home. i have 3 kids, my oldest 2 are in school but my youngest is always at home. its always the same as you said and i as well feel like im pawning him off when i ask somebody to watch him, but I need a break too. For the dads that go to work, they get their break from the kids and then they also get a break from work on their days off, but being a mother, when do we get a break?? so every other weekend, my mom or somebody will watch the kids so that I can have a break. Its nice, and its something I think all stay at home moms should try. If you dont make time for yourself, your not going to be good to anybody and you will start resenting everything and everybody.

Lourdes - posted on 05/18/2010

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I'm a stay at home mom as well and feel like I'm in jail, I have a one and a half month old and I don't live with family but feel like I do, my grandmother lives 4 houses from mine and always tells me I can't take my baby anywhere because she will get sick my fiancee tells me the same thing. I don't know what to do. I'm about to go crazy. I'm at the point that I don't feel like doing anything in my house not even daily chores that are so simple. I know my baby is a newborn and should not expose her to certain things but I don't think that going for a walk at 9ish when the sun is not strong will harm her. I as well will not let her with anyone. I want to take her everywhere I go but I'm stuck at home I think in this month and half I've only gone out the house about 6 times.

Barbora Milena - posted on 05/18/2010

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Hi, since I was pregnant, my mum kept telling me this sentence - the baby is happy when the mum is happy...tired n stressed mama is makin the baby stressed as well, so if u take some time just for yourself, you r doing the right thing for u and your baby...
Im stay at home mum and single mum as well, my daughter is 6mo and Im bfeeding, so I cannot get away for too long, but time to time I leave her with my parents and go for a coffee, or just take a long relaxing bath.. its worth and I think every mother deserves "me time"... becomin mother doesnt mean you are not a person anymore, plus you are not just mother, you are daughter, sister, wife, friend etc... dont cut off your personal life, keep living it and add the role of mum...find the balance...

Melissa - posted on 05/17/2010

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the more you let people watch him, the easier it is to do so. i know how you feel, it seems like a huge hassle having to pack up the baby just to go for a walk, but i always feel better when i make myself do it. unfortunately, walks dont last long enough... when you are stuck inside you get very irritable. its normal.

Sherry - posted on 05/17/2010

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i am in the same boat my fiance and i stay with his grandma for now and i get the same exact feeling

Gabrielle - posted on 05/17/2010

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ok ima tell u like dis thats his family and damnit sometimes u need time to urself never feel like ur puttin him on nobody cuz truthfully u got him for the rest of his life 1 hour or 1 weekend is not gonna take the love or the bond away from him he knows u love him amd as long as the ppl u leave him with are responsible then things should go fine... my advice is to try leavin him for jus a sec and do some shoppin fod clothes shoes ect whateva it may be and see how that goes now as far as findin somethin to make ur day more interesting try the library or window shoppin go to a haiir store and try some wigs on jus to see ow u would look in hair u probly would neva try wit ur real hair and jus watch urself transform let me know how it goes

Samantha - posted on 05/17/2010

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I don't know what town you are in, but there is an international organization called the MOMS club. I am 23 and I am in it and there all women all the way up to 40's. We are all stay at home moms and we do TONS of things. There is something going on almost everday during the week. Those women quickly became my friends and their children are my daughters friends. We have so much fun. I would highly recommend you join this or a similar club. It is a wonderful way to stay involved and enjoy your choice of at home mothering!

Elysia - posted on 05/14/2010

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im a stay at home mum and yes it does feel as though its the same every day. I take my son to playgroup oneday a week to get us both out of the house and allow us both to have age appropiate socialisation. I also have playdates with other mums and bubs. I do feel the same as you about leaving him behind. I fell guilty im his mum i should be looking after him, but ive come to realise that u need that time to yourself to recoup and allow yourself to be the best mum you can be. And im tryin to do it at the moment cause im due to have my 2nd baby in 8weeks and my son will only be 16months old so i know its goin to be tough for awhile for me to get a rest so i have to give in now and let daddy and nanny watch him when they offer

Amanda - posted on 05/14/2010

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i'm in the same boat my husban and i share a house with my father and even when he offers to watch my 2 month old son so i can get sumthing done or take a nap i feel bad like he thinks im a bad mom or sumthing even know he does act or say anything like that to me...i cant help feeling this way

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