Stay-home Moms struggling?

Natalie Rose - posted on 08/29/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello Fellow Stay-At-Home-Mommas,



Is anyone else struggling with feeling un-fulfilled in your life as a mommy? I am a young mother (just turned 23 and have two children under two) and I was a budding musician. With high hopes for a career as a professional musician, I was ambitious and following my dreams towards becoming a successful recording/performing artist. When I met and married my husband, we decided to start our family right away and I made a *concious decision* to put my career on hold. I didn't look back for a moment and I was thrilled to be taking a break to be a mother. When our daughter was 7 months old, we got pregnant again, our happy surprise, and our son is now 3 months old. I still cherish being a mother and I wouldn't change a thing or wish I'd not had children, but I have to admit I have truly struggled since my second was born. The first 2 months I had severe Post Partum Depression and once I was over that hump I sort of settled into a routine and I do have my up days. As a whole, though, I am lonely, I feel dissatisfied, and I have been thinking an awful lot about what I could have done with my life if I had waited to have children. My husband is wonderfully understanding and loving, and it's not that I necessarily wish my life different, I'm just having a hard time as I'm in the throws of mothering two very young children.



I am fully aware of my situation and I know why I feel the way I do, but I thought if there were some other young mothers out there possibly struggling with the same thing I might find some encouragement from you. I am energetic and interactive with my children and I love them dearly, but sadly, I feel a little empty when it comes to me and my own well-being.



I know this is only a phase and it, too, will pass like everything else, but the loneliness and routine of my day-to-day life is a bit of a downer for me right now.

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2 Comments

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Dara - posted on 08/29/2010

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Natalie,

I can absolutely sympathize with your situation! I am a little older...I'm 29, but I have two kids as well - a five year old and 11 month old. I am a teacher, and I left my profession to have my second child, opening a day home so I can afford to be at home with my kids. It is a wonderful thing to have children, but it is incredibly taxing, and isn't always fun or happy.

Some ways I have been trying to fulfill myself are to invest time in my passions, what little I have. I cherish nap times, and those quiet moments in the evening when the kids are sleeping. I have taken up writing, something I always loved but never did anything with. I have begun to write a blog about my quest to find balance in my crazy life, which you can find in the links section of this forum, and I have started a novel. I also go to the gym to work out some of the frustration that comes with having to put my life on hold while my kids are little. It's so important that moms do things for themselves! Maybe you could take a few moments every day to spend some time singing or writing songs while hubby watches the kids or something. For me, it was really just finding those small things that I can look forward to that give me a sense that there is more to me than being a mom.

Tanya - posted on 08/29/2010

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Hello. Im Tanya. Im 25 an goin 2 have my 2nd child. I kinda no where ur comin from.Im workin on becomin an artist. When Im got with my hubby we wanted 2 have a family. I put my life on hold so that I would raise our children.
It is hard bein home alone an doin about the same thing over an over again. One way I have dealt with it is that I show my son the stuff that I love 2 do. I give him a crayon(I have 2 watch him with it, lol) an let him draw. I have drums, a piano, an toy gitar(sorry can spell 2day,lol). An I let him play with them. Hes only 9 months but loves 2 play with them.
Just try an change it up every now an then, get out of the house 1 or 2 times a day. Even if its just 2 go 4 a walk or 2 the park. It will slowly get better. Best of Luck. :)