What would you think??

Stefanie - posted on 02/04/2010

He is cheating in his mind, that is enough for me to put a stop to it!

Stefanie - posted on 02/04/2010

I know exactly what you are going through! I went through the same type of thing about a month ago. My husband was talking to girls from work, (his customers) about very sexual things. I found the text messages, and he denied it even though the prrof was in thin air. I had to give him a ultimatum. I was gunna leave and take my kids with me. We started goin to marriage counseling, and it really has helped the situation a lot! If you want to know more send me a message in my inbox :)

Angie - posted on 02/04/2010

Thanks for the help ladies....doesn't make it any easier...just wanted to see if I was overreacting. I think some ultimatums are just going to have to be set...I don't deserve this...I don't treat him that way.

Crystal - posted on 02/04/2010

one questions to ask your self is what you would consider to be cheating. just because someone is along way away doesnt mean he can't cheat if you think having in depth, personal , flirty conversations are cheating. also sit down and think about what you are prepared to do. dont make threats of leaving if you wont actually do it. i have done that before and it was a mistake.

Angie - posted on 02/04/2010

Okay ladies....heres the thing....besides finding this out I had absolutely no questions to whether or not he was honest & faithful. On top of that we just got married 6 months ago...yes we have been together for 6 1/2 yrs. I felt like our relationship was excellent & going very well. I had no reason at all to think there was anything going on. Now the thing that's got me extremly upset & questioning it is because he doesn't add these girls...he just looks them up when he is on myspace which I just found out about. I dunno how many converstions he's had cuz he probably deletes them. Now I did ask him a little bit, like why are you talking to these girls "no answer", are you not happy with me "no answer", what do you talk to them about "whatever". Now this is what I told him....and I know he dont believe it...." I can't believe you not even gonna apologize like you did nothing wrong. Bullshit. We ARE going to talk about this because if we don't then we can kiss this relationship goodbye" Now I had to txt this to him because he had to go to work but I have not received a response yet. Here's the thing, I don't think he has cheated cuz the girls do not live anywhere near us. But it's making me think it's only a matter of time....and the kicker is he's trying to make it seem like I am totally ridiculous.....It's crushing me little by little

Renee - posted on 02/04/2010

If he was a boyfriend, there would be an easier answer. But since he's your husband, there's a lot more to think about, a lot more at risk, you have a child together I assume? How do you feel? You didn't talk about how *you* felt about your relationship with him. Do you feel like it's fizzing out? What do you think made him want to start "meeting" other women? You need to think about these things and have an answer, then you can start thinking about what to do. Do you think that it's something that can be resolved/forgiven? Do you think he'll change or just find ways to get better at hiding what he's doing? You don't give enough information to form a good answer. Think about these things.

Carley - posted on 02/04/2010

the way he is acting would say so you can feel a horrible tension betwwen you if he has and ther is no misstakeing it and that a promise

DeeAnna - posted on 02/04/2010

well, in my opion, you have two options... 1.) start talking to guys on the internet and treat him like you are being treated. Just don't care what he thinks. If he don't want to talk about it or deal with it like an adult, show him what it feels like. (I know that my husband thought that watching our baby was easy until he had to watch her for a day.) Cut back on the attention you are giving him and maybe he'll miss what he's got right infront of him.... Now with this in mind, you would be stepping down to his level, but it might make you feel good.

Option 2.) Sit him down and explain to him that you are both adults and that you need to talk about this. It hurts you and express your feelings. But remember to include his feelings in this. Ask him what is going wrong and what if you did the same thing to him. Try to keep this a two way conversation and not all about you. He might not think that what he is doing is wrong (and it might not be wrong). Just try to look at it from his point of view too.

These are only two ideas, please don't feel you have to do any of the suggestions. They are just things that I might do. Some times men need to see what it's like before they understand what it's like. Good luck! I hope it all works out.

Tracy - posted on 02/04/2010

sorry to say honey, but if his not cheating already then he is diffently thinking about it... i know because i have been through this with my husband, all i can say is don't stay because of ur bubba, however if u want ur marriage to work he needs to admit to what ever is going on and u both need to want it to work, i took several months for my husband to say that he wanted it to work, so be patient, i owe my marriage to hard work from both myself and my husband and i recommend married cousilling it did wonders for us... i hope this helps and go with what u are feeling if u feel that something is going on then it probably is.... i hope that u can work things out whichever way it goes.....

Tori - posted on 02/04/2010

i had a previous partner go on plenty of fish (a date site my friend saw him on and told me) i knew he would deny anything and i would end up feeling bad, so b4 i confronted him i made a fake profile up and started messaging him, yes he was trying to cheat, he still denyed it even with the evidence, but i knew enough to kick him out, im not saying your partner is doing anything wrong, but if u are worried and dont trust his answers, set up a fake profile on myspace and talk to him, see what he is up to, if it's all innocent he never has to know you checked up, either way you will know. just think 1st if you really do want to know because sometimes you dont get the answer you want.

Kelly - posted on 02/04/2010

this man's behavour is ridiculous,you shouldnt put up with this ,you deserve better.Why would he even be sending these messages,hes got a wife and child for god sake! The ways hes behaving when you ask him makes me think hes got something to hide,i think make sometime alone with each other(maybe wen ur little ones in bed) and sit down and ask him outright all the questions you need answers to,if hes reluctant then tough .ull have to force it out off him(nag him or something,dont beat him up or anything lol).he needs to learn hw this is making you feel,and tell him to either stop it or go,becuase his behavour is unnacceptable!!! x

Alissa - posted on 02/04/2010

I would definately feel the same way! If it were my man I would make him delete his myspace or at least all the random females. I do, however, think that if your man has never given you any reason not to trust him, then by all means give him the benefit of the doubt, but it does seem like he's acting shady. I hope things work out, that would be a difficult situation for me.