Why is it mother-in-laws are really irritating???

Lisa - posted on 07/05/2011

Fortunately, I have a great MIL. Her son, absolutely NOT so great. Since our divorce he hasn't seen his children but one time; two years?? His mother does not defend him, but she does spend a lot of time with her grandchildren. And I have a alternative lifestyle, which she knows of and may not approve, but does not condemn either.

Savona - posted on 07/03/2011

Maternal instinct to want to help. Even if it may be pushing their boundaries. =/ I always feel like MY mom is trying to get me to do things the way she did them. Makes me sad that I only ever met my MIL once before she passed. Im sure she would of had some input on our thoughts on raising our babies. But, all ya can do is listen, and let them know that youre doing it the way you feel is right.

Marisa - posted on 07/03/2011

I agree Angela 100%

Lisa - posted on 07/03/2011

Agree'd Anglea!!!

Angela - posted on 07/03/2011

sometimes its a hard pill to swallow for the inlaws but they need to know when to back off and let there kids be the parents

Lisa - posted on 07/01/2011

Tasha yes he did crawl lol he was crawling at just under 5mths, but thats interesting about that stuff...I think I may have to Angela, even though I know she's not going to agree!

Lisa - posted on 07/01/2011

Tasha yes he did crawl lol he was crawling at just under 5mths, but thats interesting about that stuff...I think I may have to Angela, even though I know she's not going to agree!

Angela - posted on 07/01/2011

I think for some woman they feel the need to continue parenting even when its not the job anymore I think you should nicely tell her that u know what your doing and thanks for the support but you got it!

Tasha - posted on 07/01/2011

just asking Lisa...but did your son crawl first? the only reason i'm asking is because it is a much needed developmental milestone for later in life. Kinda like a child who cant rip paper cant cut with sissors...weird i know, but my nephew didnt crawl and it affected his hand writting, my daughter didnt tear paper and she could cut with sissors untill we taught her to tear. Just wondering.

Lisa - posted on 06/30/2011

Yes Tasha, That would be a good fix but my husband frights more with her than I do lol She dosn't relise she's being nasty! But I am usually the peace maker between their family, I think I will just stay out of it from now on... Marisa, I am the same, she dosn't agree with the way I'm raising my boy lol Like when he started walking at 8months she was trying to stop him, I told her "he will do things in his own time and if it's early so be it!" but she didn't agree! I don't understand how you can stop a child from learning!! Or why you would even want to!! Beats me! lol

Marisa - posted on 06/28/2011

It drives my MIL nuts that I have my own parenting style and not following hers, my style is more liberal and laid back, & she is more conservative. I just ignore her advice and her overbearing behavior. I am also thankful that my hubby supports my decisions all the way

Tasha - posted on 06/28/2011

How does your husband feel about this? Does he see it, or is he blind to it? My MIL and i didnt see eachother for months...basically my entire last pregnancy and the first time we saw eachother was the day my son was born.I wouldnt let me kids go see her but my husband was free to do what he liked on his own time. But close to the enD i let my husband take the girls over. Maybe you should try that when she has been starting her nagging. Let him take your son and visit take yourself out of it. Claim to be busy doing something.

Lisa - posted on 06/28/2011

Yea, I know she wants to help but other times she & my sis-in-law gang up on me! They make me feel like I am a bad mother! I don't know what to do? If I say anything they twist everything round to make me look like the biggest b***h of the year! I just keep my distance, then I get accused of keeping my son away from them!!! I've told them all they have to do is ring me & ask if it's ok to come round for a cuppa! but that's to easy for them I suppose?

Lisa - posted on 06/28/2011

Yea, I know she wants to help but other times she & my sis-in-law gang up on me! They make me feel like I am a bad mother! I don't know what to do? If I say anything they twist everything round to make me look like the biggest b***h of the year! I just keep my distance, then I get accused of keeping my son away from them!!! I've told them all they have to do is ring me & ask if it's ok to come round for a cuppa! but that's to easy for them I suppose?

Laurie - posted on 06/28/2011

They are so over-bearing. I actually live with my MIL. Just because she's raised her kids, it does not give her the right to boss you around. When it gets to that point, you have to stand your ground. She can give you all the advice she wants. But at the end of the day, your going to do whatever it is that you do that fits your own parenting style.

Tasha - posted on 06/28/2011

I dont know if you got it, but CoM just sent out an email that talks about ways to deal with MILs! Otherwise you should be able to find it under ROUNDUP at the top beside My Communities!

Firebird - posted on 06/28/2011

I have to be the only person in the world who didn't have to deal with any of this, my mom knew to let me do my own thing while offering tidbits of advice and answering my questions, and my ex's family knew that I'd tell them to F%$k off if the overstepped their boundaries. Just tell MIL that you appreciate her input but you've already decided on a method that is working well for you.

Tasha - posted on 06/28/2011

All I can say is atleast your MIL cares enough about your son to want to "help". My MIL is a total jerk, and doesnt say anything, but she makes it clear my children are nothing like me (unless they do something wrong) everything they do or say or even what they look like is their Daddy...I wanna know how he made a baby by himself and I have the "damaged" body to say I carried, fed, and nutured them! lol!!!!!



Now my Mom on the other hand tries to direct what we do with my kids which drives my husband and I both insain...we simply nod smile "Yes we will try that" and sometimes we do sometimes we dont. Let it roll to keep the peace. Alot of Grandmas thinks they know it all or atleast alot, because they experienced it. I know crazy! Good luck! I know this wasnt much help, but atleast you know your not alone!