22 and no friends

Lindsey - posted on 01/23/2018 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My son is 22 he has a job...a car....no friends.he often spends his time off on his own.he has no friends not even from work.they don't get him.hrs recently joined a cross fit group to help loose weight as he over eats and hot so over weight.hes tried to be friend people but gets left out of things.there nice enough but don't really want to be social with him.he is immature and acts the fool...behaves and says inappropriate things all the time.he embarrassed himself and feels awkward.he gas got so low, he's talked about suicide.hes been on line chatting to people getting himself into trouble even talking to who he believed to be girls who were people pretending and calling him a profile.threayening him with all sorts.its s nightmare.hes bad tempered all the time and then miserable.hes trying too hard to find friends but doing it all wrong.ive tried and tried helping him.explaing things , using tough love,. It's so hard.i never know what I'm in for each day.im so scared that he will take his own life.where can I find someone to help him.give him advice.show him that life is worth living.pleadr help.......

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Susan - posted on 01/24/2018

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Unfortunately autistic children need more support than other children.Often well into adulthood. Does the Goodwill in your area offer services? If not are there other agencies in your area which offer assistance to adults on the spectrum? Some have group activities. Others just offer guidance for day to day problems. I have found many helpful suggestions for my adult AS child on Autism Speaks website. https://www.autismspeaks.org/
Another informative website is the Autism Society (they have been around longer) http://www.autism-society.org/ We really had to push our son to be involved in good social activities. However, once we did his depression faded and he started maturing in other areas. We work on focusing on one thing at a time and applauding him for his good efforts. This works much better than being critical, which is how we used to be.

Leslie - posted on 01/24/2018

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That's great that he has a job and a car! Definite strengths! Is he officially diagnosed on the spectrum? If so does he know it??? Does he accept it?? Would he be willing to see a counselor? If so that's the route I would go - so often our adult kids take the advice of others easier even if it's the same thing we would tell them!!! ;-) A counselor/therapist can help him with his social cues and interactions, self-confidence and self-worth, general mood, etc. Most health care plans cover mental health counseling of some sort and can help you find someone in your area. Hopefully that will help him - and you!

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