my son is going totally off the rails he steals swears spits ans is inapropriate

Claire - posted on 05/31/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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he has been caught at school touching girls inappropriatly and when reprimanded he just laughed thinking it was funny i have taught him right from wrong and i am in a loving stable relationship but am totally confused to ahy he chooses to be this way i just dont know what to do as the stealing is getting out of hand is anyone else going thru this please help me i`m desperate as i am depressed i love him as a son but as a person i dont like what he is becoming

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Julie - posted on 05/31/2010

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My son a few years back (he's 13 now and JUST getting kinda back on track) I taught all 4 of my kids right from wrong, but as I was told after crying my eyes out and tearing my hair out, all the stealing, bunking off school, smoking ect that my son went through is normal. Its a way to find their own personality, but this didn't make me feel any more at ease with any of it. Its also his way of trying to get more attention, girls do it differently completely, but we found no matter what we did it always seemed to make things worse, and I felt that we were always telling him off.
He was as it turned out getting in with the worst crowd ever at senior school, so after a visit to the school (unknown to Connor) I highlighted the problems there.
As for punishment we found the ultimate "trendy" (term used loosely) way. He has a PSP (although any game console works). He spent hours "levelling up" on games.... So we deleted his profiles, making him realise that he looses something he has worked for, and had to work for it again...
I hope this helps,
Keep your chin up your are not alone!
xXx

Erica - posted on 06/02/2010

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My son is 6 and is literally obsessed with his genatalia or/and that of others! He's always touching his or pulling his pants down or smacking his butt or mine if I walk by! I have taught him over and over again that it is wrong and he just laughs it off. I'm embarassed and scared that he will do it at school and get me in deep trouble, ya know? About the stealing, both of my boys steal things from school and daycare on a daily basis. My six year old even put stuff in my purse at walmart! It's just a part of their diagnosis that is very hard to deal with. I'm right there with ya sister!

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Julie - posted on 06/11/2010

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I have only ever had to delete the profile once, after threatening it and getting the "you always say that, but you never do!" answer. It really works :)
Encouraging good behaviour is always more recommended, but I know when i was at that stage with my son, I found it extremely difficult, as it seemed he was always doing something wrong, and nothing could be praised!

Kelli - posted on 06/02/2010

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Julie, I like your idea of deleting all your son's profiles for his games! That's one I had not thought of...........but I'm curious ....did it work? I have a 12 yr old daughter that has a rare genetic disorder,22q11.2 deletion which cause serious behavior problems! I am at my wits end! Anything you can think of she's done it! We've tried so many different behavior plans,therapy,read tons of parenting books,she was even placed in a therapeutic foster home for 6 mths ( because child protection services got involved due to her serious problem with lying & nothing has worked! Got any suggestions? Thanks a bunch,

KR

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