When to tell other parents about your child's diagnosis

Jody - posted on 09/07/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )




Hi. I'm new. I have an almost 10 year old with PDD NOS, anxiety, and depression. Here is my query of the morning: How do you decide how and when to tell other parents (particularly the parents of your child's playmates) about your child's diagnosis?


Jody - posted on 09/08/2012




our local parents support group is going to discuss this issue at our next meeting. I'm with you lisa. I tend to share it up front. especially with family, close friends, his school, etc. however, my son, who is almost 10 now, is starting to voice his wish to be more private about his diagnosis, especially socially. also, i don't want to over share or share too quickly as I don't want Finn defined by his disability. I tend to try to suss new people out before sharing and usually wait for an autistic moment to explain where that behavior is coming from.

We received our diagnosis last February although I wasn't surprised as I have recognized his spectrum attributes for years. prior to the PDD NOS Dx, we have been living with significant anxiety disorder and a major depressive episode as well. we overcame a lot of the fears of stigma when facing the mental illness over the past few years. Quite frankly, the PDD NOS Dx was a relief!

Lisa - posted on 09/07/2012




I tell people right away. I want people to understand why Lyric gets fixated, why he doesn't stop talking, why he might seem rude at times. I'm not ashamed of his ASD. I know it will make some things much more difficult for him but it is also a part of who he is and he wouldn't be Lyric without it. And I also point out his amazing memory, the fact that he was reading by age 3.5, that he can do addition and subtraction already.

However, I have a friend who doesn't like to tell people and I completely respect that decision. What will you feel comfortable with and what will help your child. It's not an easy decision to make.


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Sophia Marie - posted on 11/10/2012




I think if they are his playmates they already know ... something is diffrent about him. if they dont ask and enjoy playing with him leave it. do you think it will change how they feel about him? friends come in all shape,size and dignosis.

Erin - posted on 09/25/2012




I'm usually not upfront any more. People just don't get it. When I try to explaine it to people about my son's behavior they just say "isn't that all kids though." Sometimes a parent will say that I need to make him understand one thing or another about his behavior.They think a simple expliation is all it should take. They don't understand how hard I'm working at trying to get him to empathise. I love my little man more than anything and he works so hard at everything he does. I'm so proud of him. I hate the world for not understanding him sometimes.

Anaquita - posted on 09/15/2012




I generally am upfront about it. Not that I really *need* to be. My son's aspergers is noticeable enough that several people suspected it well before the diagnosis. So far it hasn't caused any issues as far as the parents are concerned. Though the kids are at the age they've begun to notice that my kid is a bit unusual, compared to other kids their age.

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