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Daily Plate of Crazy

Whatever life dishes out, and whatever we can make of it. . . Daily essays from a saucy single mom on topics including real-world parenting, post-divorce life, dating over 40, sex, arts & entertainment, life's "big questions" - and a few shoes!

D A is a winner of Top 25 Blogs on Single Parenting

The Most Rewarding Part About Being a Single Parent

I would say the rewards are in parenting, period. Yes, there are unique challenges for single parents, just as there are for adoptive parents, gay parents, teenage parents or older parents, for parents with special needs themselves, or those with special needs children. For me, the rewards come with each stage in which you see your child make progress. Watching my sons work hard toward goals while holding firm to the playful side of life — that’s huge. It reminds me that I’m doing my job. The hardest job I’ve ever done, I might add.

A Piece of Advice for Other Single Parents

My advice is never assume. If you’re still in the process of divorcing, never assume that the other parent will do what you expect, or that follow-up legalities won’t be required. Never assume that family court is easy to navigate, and remember that divorce laws are state-specific. Never assume that your child is telling you everything he or she is feeling — about divorce, about an absent parent, about you or the changes in your family situation. Never assume that transitions will be simple, or for that matter, that they will be dreadful. Children heal differently — your own children will heal differently. Never assume that post-divorce life will cease tossing obstacles your way — some that are difficult, but others that may be blessings in disguise. And never assume you can do it all alone. None of us can or should, married or otherwise.