advice please :)

Rachel - posted on 02/05/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I'm a SAHM of a 17 month old little boy and I love bf-ing but lately its been really trying. He wants to nurse every 20 mins and I can't even hold him without him pinching, biting or slapping my breasts. He can't stand to be with anyone else (including his father) for any part of his routine, (baths,diaper changes,changing clothes ect...) another thing he does is constantly switch back and forth between breasts while nursing and while hes nursing one side he is always trying to fondle the other one. while climbing all over me. (i long for those nursing sessions where he would drift off to sleep! lol!) I'm just a little frustrated. I had a goal of 2 solid years bf-ing and I know i can do it but I want to enjoy it again. its like every nursing session, I feel like i'm being mauled by my son (between the pinching, biting, slapping and climbing) does anyone have any suggestions? I'm open to anything, Weaning is a last resort, but this seems to be the only advice I've been getting. thank you :)

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Angela - posted on 02/05/2011

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I felt the same way with my daughter around that age. I had to start putting my foot down a little to get her to behave better while nursing. At that age they are able to understand simple things and if you're consistent (VERY hard sometimes lol) he will get the picture. Tell him no to a couple of those things at a time and maybe give him something to distract him. My daughter liked to play with my hair and even if I had to lean over for her to reach or redo my hair after every feeding it was worth it too me. When she was misbehaving I would tell her no several times, giving her my hair or holding her hand and speaking to her to calm her, and then if still doing it "ok no more nursing" and put her down. Of course she got mad but after a while she got the point. It was time consuming and frustrating but worth it. She is 24 months and still bf 3-5 times a day. She actually never learned to open her mouth wider so her teeth still get me at times but I know shes not doing it on purpose. We do have times when she has to stop because i'm sore and we both get frustrated. I try to relax and be proud that I've bf as long as I have and that she and I still enjoy it most of the time.

I did start having her stay with my husband about that age as well for short times at first, letting them both get to know that they could manage without me and now she's fine with someone she knows. And yes she would cry for me for a short time and it was very hard but I knew she would be ok and after a few minutes she would be distracted and fine. For both the bf and getting him to be with someone else, be sure to give him lots of encouragement.
I'm glad that you've bf this long and want to keep going. It it so good for them and you know you're doing the best for him in the long run. Good luck!!!

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Aicha - posted on 02/05/2011

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read the happiest toddler on the block by Harvey Karp also what I found helps a lot is when they pinch bite or slap the breast is take it away and tell them be nice to the breast when they nurse nicely then give them positive feed back like what a good boy nursing without pinching . at this age routines are so important and also taking a break for mommy at least once a day even if it's just a uninterrupted show at first it will be hard and he will scream but stick with it and he will get use to it

Adrienne - posted on 02/05/2011

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maybe you should treat these tantrums the same as you would a regular one. you wouldn't allow him to bite, slap, or pinch in any other setting im sure. so just use the same techniques. my daughter is 10 months and she gets a little rowdy sometimes and I just reinforce as i would any other time. hope this helps!!!

Jacky - posted on 02/05/2011

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Maybe try to tell him that you dont like what he is doing. Un latch him and firmly say no and say that he is hurting you. Then when he is calm have him latch on...and repeat.

Congrats on making it so far! My youngest is almost 15 months old...... don't let others tell you to wean. He is clearly not wanting to wean yet.... seems he is more obsessed! hehe

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Rachel - posted on 02/05/2011

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ugh! my son scapes with his teeth too!!! not all the time but I feel like my nipples callused. they have very little feeling. lol! thank u for your help. I really get tired of everyone telling me to wean him. I feel like that would do more damage than good at this point.

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