Can't get my 12 month old to nap!!!!!!!! Gonna pull my hair out!

Shayla - posted on 11/25/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My daughter will be 12 months on Dec 4. I have had to get rid of her swing and bouncer cause obviously she has grown out of it. She falls asleep for naps while nursing and I can take my nipple out without her waking up but EVERYTIME I lay her down she gets up. I have tried letting her cry herself to sleep. It does not work. Everytime she gets up I lay her down, say good night and walk away. We will go thru this for about an hour before I'm fed up and just take her out. I am at my mits ends! She wines ALL DAY LONG cause she is so tired but....seriously, I just don't know what to do. I've tried putting her in her play pen, her crib, I try rocking her back to sleep and I've tried singing. I've even made a really comfy pallet on the floor for her. I'm literally about to lose my mind. I really can't handle anymore. Please somebody help me please please please.

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Lise - posted on 12/12/2010

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I made a bed for my daughter on the floor. Rather than nurse her down and then transfer her, I nurse her down on the floor. Then I slowly move away.

Good luck!

[deleted account]

I forgot to say, when she was 10 months old she dropped her first nap in the morning and as a result got more and more sleep-deprived and miserable. In the end we went to the doctor who gave us a prescription for vallergan, an anti-histamin with the side-effect of drowsiness. We gave her the full dose at night-time for about a months and eventually things got better at day-time again. Sometimes you are on such a downward spiral that you need some extra help. Not very PC and certainly not for long-term use, but as I said - whatever works.

[deleted account]

Hi Shayla, sorry for responding so late. I saw your post a week ago and never got around to answering - the joys when you have a non-sleeper like yourself! Sadly, I don't have a good answer for you either, I can just tell you how I am coping with pretty much the same problem. My daughter sleeps badly day and night plus we always had serious problems getting her to sleep in the first place. I stopped being able to move her at all after falling asleep when she was about three months old - she is 15 months now. As a result we are co-sleeping now (which I do love) and I lie down with her and nurse her to sleep. In the evening I will slip out when she has fallen asleep and then keep going back in every time she wakes, but at day-time I have resigned myself to the fact that I have to nap with her if I want her to get sufficiant sleep. For the first 40 minutes or so that's lovely, because I do need a bit of a nap myself, but generally after that I'd rather do the dishes/tidy up/check my e-mails/watch my favourite soap - anything bar lie there and be bored stiff. But no sleep during the day means an unbearable baby in the afternoon plus terrible sleep during the night, so I just go with it. I'm working in the morning, so generally I come home around one o'clock, take miserably tired baby out of my partners arms, take my boobs out and start rocking her on the mattress - at day-time just nursing would never do, rocking used to take an hour, now it's 15 minutes, still rough at 33lbs. By the time we get up again it's after 3pm. She's going back to bed at 7pm and we are living 30 minutes away from everything and everywhere, so the time I have to get things done is extremely short. The book 'The no-cry sleep solution' by Elisabeth Pantley helped me a lot by explaining infant sleep to me and giving useful tipps. Things are still bad but not half as bad as they used to be after all. It's an easy and quick read as well and you can get it used from amazon. I know it's really hard when you have so much to do in the day plus you could really do with some time to yourself and instead you have to spend hours and hours each day helping your baby to sleep. But I also know that I'd probably be so much more exhausted if I didn't get my nap in the afternoon. The only advice I can give you is - go with it, lie down with her and give your body a rest. It does feel like a total waste of time, but really - it's not. I had plenty of moments where I just wanted to throw her out the window. A few times I just ploncked her on the mattress and walked out telling her if she wanted to be miserable and tired - fine! Don't try to be Super-Mom. You are on your own. Your household doesn't have to be perfect, your baby doesn't need a bath every night, food doesn't always have to be home-cooked. I am making compromises on a daily basis. I have to because otherwise I'd go insane. It must be so hard going through this without a partner. We don't have any family around either, but at least I have emotional support in my relationship and that counts for a lot. Do you have any support from your own family? Or maybe a friend who could give you an hour here and there away from your baby? I find just getting away from her here and there really helps. Apart from that my rule is: I don't care what I have to do to get her to sleep, if it works I'll do it. So if she only sleeps in your bed with you next to her, go for it. She'll be happier and much easier to deal with afterwards. And definitely get that book, sometimes small things can make a big difference. Anyway, I really wish I could be of more help, knowing how incredibly stressful, frustrating, exhausting and never-ending it can be. You are not alone in your struggle, there are plenty of us out there. Good luck to you, you are a great mom!

Shayla - posted on 11/25/2010

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She will sleep as long as its on top of my chest. And thats only if I move her very gently and slowly from nursing position. She is now alseep in my bed after an hour and a half of fighting with me to go to sleep. I got tired of dealing with it and just laid her in bed with me. I walked out when she feel asleep. I've been going thru this for a freakn week now. I'm an emotional wreck because I too am very tired. I want to slam my head thru a wall. I'm a single mom with NO HELP what so ever from her father or any of his family. I do everything myself with and for her. Please someone give me some useful advice. None of the calm down bologne. I've been calm up until yesterday for the 6th day in a row of dealing with this.

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