Hi! Do you recommend parent-led or child-led weaning? My baby will be two at the end of this month.

Scarlet - posted on 12/12/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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And my hubby really wants us to wean ASAP!!! HELP!!! Thanks!

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Timora - posted on 12/14/2011

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Like others have said it should be up to you and baby, not your husband. My first was down to only nursing in the morning and before sleep and at about 15 months, just lost interest to the point that she told me no. I didn't have any problems with engorgement or anything. She's allergic to milk so I definitely would have kept going, but I wasn't going to force her if she was done. By 2, I personally would probably be about ready to stop, but that's up to you and only you. Things I would consider - how often are you nursing, is it more for comfort or for food, do you mind nursing for comfort, is baby asking or are you offering? Maybe just start waiting for baby to ask if you aren't already. Like others have mentioned unless YOU are really ready to stop, child led will be easier and will probably taper off naturally. Nursing is great for mother and child no matter how long it lasts.

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Aleks - posted on 12/13/2011

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This is going to be sharp, but not meaning to be rude.

Breastfeeding relationship is between YOU and BABY. Hubby may have a small input into it via verbal/emotional communication but its not his relationship. If you wean because your hubby wants you to, you will forever regret it and at the same time have to go through a tough time with it (if you do it ASAP) and so will your baby. Is that worth it?

Besides, no painless/stress free weaning is ever ASAP, as someone already pointed out.

Please consider your options and choices before going through something that may never be undone later.

Rian - posted on 12/13/2011

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Also, is he full on nursing or does he nurse while distracted. With my first I weaned him at 16 months since I was pregnant with my second and wanted to start fresh for her. With him he always used a boppy and associated it with nursing. If he saw it he wanted to nurse, so I just hid it and didn't offer unless he asked, he was weaned within the week. With my daughter I had a cut off time of 2 years for her, her birthday was the last day she was nursed. I had her down to only in the mornings, mostly so she would fall asleep again so I wouldn't have to get up at 5am. With her it was a little bit more of a struggle but not too bad. I just held my ground and told her that the boppy (what she called nursing) was broken, every time she asked I told her and she stopped whining about it pretty quickly. She didn't really seem to enjoy it as much as she did when she was younger and I wanted to have my body back . Leaving it up to them can be risky unless you don't mind being a parent who nurses their child well in to their 3rd, 4th or 5th years since it does become routine and a soothing thing for them. Good luck with whatever you decide. Though in your husband's defense, your body has been different since you got pregnant almost 3 years ago and I'm sure it's been difficult for him. I know my husband wasn't to fond of the milk showers during sex :)

Michelle - posted on 12/13/2011

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I plan to use the 'don't offer, don't refuse' method, although I limit feeding as it is. Look hard at why you're doing this - I think it will be much easier if it's what you actually want rather than you both resisting it.

Denikka - posted on 12/12/2011

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Yea, why does hubby want to wean?? Weaning should occur when MOM and BABY are ready...and if your little one is still going full out, it's not going to be quick, nor should it be.
I used child led weaning with my first (youngest is still nursing) and that was the least stressful way I could imagine for both of us. I didn't even have any engorgement discomfort.
Good luck to you :) Unless there's a medical problem, there's really no reason to wean if you don't want to :)

Charitty - posted on 12/12/2011

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I agree with previous poster.
Ask hubby specific questions as to what you want.
How many times is she nursing a day?

Celeste - posted on 12/12/2011

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Depends on what you're comfortable with.
Child led weaning is easier, you don't have to do anything.

Why does your husband want you to wean?

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