How can I tell my mother to back off when...

User - posted on 09/04/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I went through a lot of struggle to try and produce breast milk I tried practically everything and went through depression stress and self hatred for a bit, until my daughter finally started getting satisfied without being given formula to fill her up. So how can I get my mom to back off when I feed my daughter around family no one else seems to care or be uncomfortable but her, as I start to feed Serenity my mother runs and grabs a blanket to cover myself (let it be known its super hot and no AC last thing I want is a blanket). I tell her I didn't go through so much to feed my baby just to have someone cover up my hard work let alone tell me I need to "have more respect for myself" when I choose not to cover up, I'm not flashing anyone or dressing like a hoochie for her to say that. how can I tell her to back off nicely and let me do what I feel is right for me and my lifestyle? I just wished breastfeeding in public or feeding a child how it was meant to be is so taboo, a breast isn't a sexual organ!

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User - posted on 09/06/2012

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I ASKED MY MOM IF SHE WOULD TAKE A GRANDPARENTING CLASS AND I WOULD PAY FOR IT, I LET HER KNOW IT WAS JUST UPDATED INFORMATION FOR HER AND TO BE A GRANDMA NOT A MOTHER. I LOVE HER AND SHE DID GOOD WITH ME BUT ITS MY TURN, ITS HARD BECAUSE I TAKE SOME ADVICE AND CONSIDER OTHERS I FEEL ARE RIGHT FOR ME BUT IF I DNT DO AS SHE ADVISED SHE GETS UPSET BUT FOR HER THE MAIN PROBLEM IS THAT I DNT CARE TO COVER MYSELF WHILE I FEED, IF IM UNCOMFORTABLE AT THE MOMENT ILL COVER OR IF MY HUSBAND DOESNT FEEL COMFORTABLE, SHE JUST FEELS ANY OTHER MALE AROUND WILL STARE I JUST FEEL SO IRRITATED THAT IF ITS A BOTTLE NO ONE CARES BUT BECAUSE ITS A BREAST ITS A BIG ORDEAL THEY DNT HAVE TO "WARN" ME WHEN THEY ARE ABOUT TO EAT WHY SHOULD I "WARN" THEM

Dove - posted on 09/05/2012

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I'm sorry! That must be rough. My mom was my biggest supporter since she nursed me and my brother for 2-3 years each... and we're in our late to mid-thirties now.



Maybe you can get some breastfeeding fact and print them out for her... or have her go to a doctor appointment with you to hear from the doctor how good breastfeeding is.... or maybe you just need to be firm with her and literally tell her to back off.



Good luck and good job with the little one!!

Holly - posted on 09/05/2012

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Maybe you need to show her the WHO (World Health Organization)'s and le leche leagues standards of breastfeeding for 2 years and beyond. That normally quiets everyone I know.

User - posted on 09/05/2012

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lol its hard for her to agree to disagree, she even thinks i am weird that i like breastfeeding that i have this strange beautiful connection with her when she eats but she only did it for 2 months n stopped because thats all they required at the time and has a hard time believing that a baby needs breast milk for that long and that a child of 3mnths needs so much attention i guess times have changed drastically but yet it has been 19 since she had my younger sister. i tried telling her but she thinks im wrong and belittles my choices

Holly - posted on 09/04/2012

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My mom is the same way. My baby is 8 months old and I have a 3 year old as well. Just keep doing what you're doing and explain to your mom how you really feel.

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