How do i know when i have tried enough??

Alejandramair - posted on 02/16/2011 ( 22 moms have responded )

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Hi again ladies. So our newest thing is that not only is she not taking the right side she is not refusing to breast feed at all! Does this mean she has weined herself off of breastfeeding for good or am i doing something wrong?!?! She seems to get super fussy when i put her towards the breast at anytime before she was ok sometimes but not others i have tried the recommended cut back her supplements but at this point i do not want to starve her. She will just cry and scream untill i give her the bottle =( I honestly don't know what to do anymore do i stope trying? Have i tried enough? I am pumping throughout the day to keep her on breast milk aswel as formula but at what poing do i say ok i think i have tried enough and long enough?!?! Please if anyone is going through this or has gone through this please let me know or any advice is appreciated I am desperate at this point to try to keep her breast feeding for at least 6 month..........

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Kimberly - posted on 02/19/2011

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My son went through a nursing strike when he was about 4 months old. It took me about a week to find out what was happening. He would refuse to nurse and get really fussy when I tried to get him to nurse, He wouldnt take a bottle but did take pumped milk from a sippy cup. What worked for us was during the day I would go in the bath him and he would nurse fine, I kept the blinds and curtains shut and kept the area really quiet. When he was almost asleep I would put him to the breast and he would nurse, Night time nursing wasnt an issue at all it was mostly during the day, I think he was distracted by all the noise and what not going on during the day. Maybe try letting baby fall asleep then nurse, The bath tub worked for us, It was a lot of work filling the tub every 3 hours or so but Like I said it only lasted a week then it was making sure everything was very still and quiet in a dark room soft music and rocking in a chair worked really well. My son is now 31 months and still nurses.. You will get through this, If it is a nursing strike finding help is key, We dont have an LLL close enough where I live but we do have a lactation specialist at the hospital and she recomended a breastfeeding support group in the area. Good luck. Keep us posted...

[deleted account]

Sounds like she is preferring the bottle due to faster flow. You could try a supplemental nursing system. That way you can supplement her at the breast instead of with the bottle. This will be an easier way to wean her off supplements if you choose and meanwhile she'll be stimulating your breasts so that your supply stays up. More info about nipple confusion and breast refusal:

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/2/t022400...

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/baby...

Addie - posted on 02/20/2011

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Our son wouldn't nurse well because he had a very stiff neck and tight tongue. We found this with the help of a lactation consultant. We took him to a chiropractor with special training in adjusting babies, and after a couple of visits, the nursing was much easier.
A friend of mine has three girls who all preferred one side over the other. She eventually nursed them all only on one side, and they're all healthy girls. (Her boob went back to normal size, too!)

Petra - posted on 02/19/2011

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Hi Alejandra, I had same problem and everything worked out great. I would definetely gradually stop giving formula and pump during the day and definetely also at night at least every 3 hours. This way you'll have enough milk. To me it sounds like typical nipple confusion.
I have twins and when I got home from hospital I was totally stressed out because they were crying all the time (hungry), had problem with latching, so I sent my husband for pump right 2nd day and started to also give them breast milk from bottle. I kind of got to point of pumping mostly for my little baby (just over 4lbs) because I wanted to make sure he gains well and "surprisingly" he was same fussy as your baby about boobie. It bugged me a lot and when it got little "easier", from 2 months I got stubborn and I offered him breast at every feeding if it would be only for 2 minutes and followed with pumped milk. At 4.5 months I got to a day when I offered him pumped milk after breastfeeding and he refused it!!!! I almost cried, it was beautiful. Since then I'm not pumping at all, breastfeeding my boys no problem (9 months now) and I am so happy I didn't give up ....just pump and always try to offer her breast first every time or just pump, don't give up, it is sooooo WORTH IT!!!! It is so easy now!!!!

Ania - posted on 02/19/2011

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you need to get lactation consultant, otherwise you will not know. My friend's baby was breastfeeding and then he didn't want it anymore because his tongue was tight and she didn't know until he was 3 months old. You know that babies would prefer a bottle because it is easier to get the milk out of it....

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Bernadette - posted on 02/21/2011

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Don't know if this will help or not, as it may be a completely different problem from the one you're having, but my daughter did go through a little phase where she didn't seem to want it, and I thought that she was losing interest and weaning herself. Turns out the problem was that I was producing a bit too much for her, and it was literally squirting into her mouth and she was gagging on it, which then made her scared to feed. I found that expressing a little bit before-hand to get rid of that initial build-up really helped and she was soon back on it as enthusiastically as ever. She ended up feeding until she was 17 months.

Carla - posted on 02/20/2011

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Hi, I hope all is going better with the BF? I also had a problem in the beginning and had to suppliment AND pump, I really felt like an inefficient milk factory for the first few months, but i found a good guide for me was how much milk I was able to express, I found with our little one, she wouldn't favour a side that wasn't producing as much milk - I would express for 20 minutes after every feed to get my milk up, and then breast feed at the next feed, as well as suppliment with what I was able to express and formula if necessary - eventually there was no longer a need for the expressing and bottle top-up feeds, but it was a long process and I often wondered if I was doing the 'wrong' thing and maybe starving my baby. I can tell you that my little girl is now 20 months old and super healthy and happy and has hardly been sick, but, had I not been able to get the milk production up, I probably would have given up, what I can say is that if you feel you've tried everything and it's not working for you, then you need to do what's right for you, afterall a happy mommmy is also very important for a happy baby. good luck!

Allison - posted on 02/20/2011

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Wow, this sounds really challenging for you, but definitely stick with it, once you sort out the main issues it will get much easier.



Definitely get professional one-on-one advice - I learned through experience that most Dr's and nurses are NOT breastfeeding experts, but the leaders from La Leche League and lactation consultants are. I never would have been able to nurse my son without DAYS of phone support with a great lactation consultant.



It took 5 days after he was born before my milk came in, but then he nursed for 2.5 years and it was GREAT (and usually very EASY!). Good lactation consultants (and LLL group leaders) are worth their weight in gold! There are local ones almost everywhere. Good luck - you can do it :) Helped me to remember this - your body MADE that beautiful, amazing baby from SCRATCH, and birthed it safely - so your body WILL be able to feed her :) Sometimes it just takes a lot of support and assistance from some experts - just like with pregnancy and birth!

Alejandramair - posted on 02/20/2011

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Ladies,all your suggestions are appreciated and beleive me i am trying all of them one at a time. I went out and baught a nipple shield to see if that will help,she seems to latch on to the shield however i am not sure if i got the right size or even how to use it i am just "winging it" however yesterday evening after her bath time i took the nipple shield put in on and put her to my breast and she took it reluctantly at first but nursed successfully on the one side,she is still fussy on the right side even with the shield on.We are not giving up though every morning i wake up and put her next to me in bed skin to skin and not force her to it we just lay there so she does not feel presure of having to nurse.I hope this works out in the long run i am still pumping and giving her the brest milk from a bottle during the day! i will be going to the website LLL and will definatley look into the SNS thanks agian for ALL the ideas they are all helping but most of all thanks for all the support i feel with all your stories i too can get through this bump in the road........ =)

Tiffany - posted on 02/20/2011

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Good luck with your nursing strike! It will turn around, as others have said.

On top of pumping often and trying to breastfeed, you could also take Fenugreek capsules. This helped me increase my milk supply and it happened in about 24-48 hours. I take the recommended dose of 2-3 capsules 3x/day, usually with my meals. It has definitely helped me a lot. Others suggest Mother's Tea, which also has some Fenugreek in it, but not as much as the capsules.

I know your daughter is still young, so your milk supply is still adjusting based on the milk she needs. So, as others have said, I'd try to decrease the formula and just exclusively breastfeed. Also, it's taxing, but you can pump and just give her breastmilk in a bottle. We do this when my daughter goes to day care.

Also, only you can decide when you've had enough and what's best for you and your daughter. Good luck, and hang in there!

Merry - posted on 02/19/2011

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Type of milk..........Calorie content....Fat content



human milk..............22 (average)....1.2 (average)†

infant formula..................20..........1.06

cow milk (whole).............19...........1.00

cow milk (2%)..................15..........0.62

cow milk (1%)..................12.........0.31

cow milk (fat-free)...........10.........0.00

goat milk..........................18.........0.90

soy milk............................18.........0.50

soy milk (reduced fat)......12........0.25

rice milk (unflavored)........15.........0.25



Your milk is her best shot at growing, as it has the best calories and fats as well as the most calories and fats. So any formula is going to be less then your milk.

Merry - posted on 02/19/2011

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You can usually entice a striking baby to breastfeed while soaking in the bathtub together! Baby gets al warm and snuggly in the tub and the skin on skin reminds them to smell the milk. I've heard it works very well.
When a baby weans from the breast it will be a very slow process, the baby will be at minimum 18 months but usually at least 2 years old.
Self weaning is never upset baby fighting the breast, that is a strike and it is fixable and temporary!

Aicha - posted on 02/18/2011

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sounds like a nursing srike hang in there keep pumping and offer breastfeedings when she is sleepy

Jill - posted on 02/18/2011

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If she only wants the bottle, get the breast milk into the bottle. I think the most important thing is she's getting the breast milk. And that way if she goes back to wanting to nurse you still have milk.

[deleted account]

SNS is the supplemental nursing system that I talked about in my first post. Sorry I was typing fast lol. Youc an find them at baby's r us. La Leche League would also be very helpful. http://www.llli.org. If you don't have a local group you can still call the nearest leader and talk to her by phone.

Penny - posted on 02/18/2011

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not sure of sns, but LLL is la leache league. the breast feeding support people they have a website xx

[deleted account]

You can put breast milk or formula in a SNS. You would just be supplementing baby at the breast instead of with a bottle.

[deleted account]

Hi Alejandra, how old is your little girl?
From your post, I gather she is less than 6 months old, and babies just do not wean themselves under a year. Sara has given you some great information. Do have a look at these sites. An at-breast supplementer could indeed be the answer. I would be contacting the LLL for their help and support.

Iona - posted on 02/16/2011

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When my daughter refused to nurse, it was usually because of teething or an ear infection. With teething, I would give her teething tablets and/or tylenol about 15-20 minutes before trying to nurse and that would usually help. Also, she would almost always nurse if she was sleeping. Hang in there mama, only you know when enough is enough!

Frances - posted on 02/16/2011

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When you mention supplement is that formula? Well I would pump if you haven't started yet and that way you would be able to breast feed till 6 months. On the bright side you don't have to worry about your little one refusing the bottle. I only nursed my baby and wanted to pump at 6 months and my daughter would not take the bottle at all. The doctor said she wouldn't starve herself but I beg to differ. Good luck.

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