New and need help!

Megan - posted on 11/27/2009 ( 11 moms have responded )

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Hi group,

I'm new and in need of some advice! My son is just about to turn one and he still doesn't sleep through the night...



A typical night goes something like this:

Rock and nurse until totally asleep and lay in crib... Half the time he'll roll over and cry as soon as he hits the mattress and we have to start all over.



He wakes up at like 1-3 am and I've resorted to bring him to bed with me (not something I want to keep doing) He just won't let me lay him back in his crib.



I still have to nurse him in bed for him to fall back asleep and he usually wake up another time before morning too.



And lately it's gotten worse, he wakes up numerous times before I even go to bed and I usually end up bring hm to the couch with me till he knocks out.



I'd like to wean him soon, but I can't do that when he depends on nursing just to fall asleep!

Any ideas on how to remove nursing from the sleep routine?

And getting him to sleep in his crib without sneaking him there...



Thanks for reading...

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Christy - posted on 01/18/2012

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I read a great book that really helped me as a new mom with my second one. I wish I had read it with my first. It's called Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. It addresses sleep problems.

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I nursed my son to sleep every night til he was 9 months old. Sometimes it would take nursing him 5-6 times in about an hour and a half before he would stay asleep. That got old FAST! I had to change things, so I did a semi-CIO w/ him. I nursed him til he was 'asleep' and put him in his crib. He woke and started crying like I expected him to and I didn't get him out. I stayed w/ him the entire time (even picked him up to try and console him a couple of times), but did not nurse him. It took about an hour before he was finally asleep.



I didn't like to do that and I am NOT a big 'fan' of CIO, but I am a single mom of 3 and sometimes you have to do what you have to do so that everyone survives. Granted, that didn't solve all of our problems. He is still (and always has been) a pretty regular night waker. The difference is that he CAN put himself to sleep at bedtime now. We still nurse to sleep (and co-sleep), so I don't know if what I've offered can be of any help.



There is light at the end of the tunnel (I hope) since my son (20 months now) has slept for a 10 hour stretch over a handful of times now. It will happen.

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i put the crib in our room too she sleeps in it more since i did that .. not as much work for me to get her back in it ... and if he works graveyard maybe you can sneak in a nap ?? durring the day ??

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it is a HUGE myth that babies go to bed and sleep through the night and parents wake up well rested ... my first slept with me till she was three my sec. still sleeps with us.... she loves to nurse and to sleep with us. she starts in her bed we have a womb sounds bear she nurses and when i lay her down she cries a little and gets up about 11 i nurse her agian put her in her bed with the bear and she is up at 2 and is with us the rest of the night ... so till im ready to stay up for a week and do some sleep training thats how it will be ... you can use anyy method that you like just look it up online... crying it out scooting farther and farther away from the bed ect. try em all till you find one that works

Brenda - posted on 11/28/2009

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I plan on cosleeping and nursing to sleep with my six month old until he gets tired of it. I put my older son to sleep with a bottle until he was two almost, and then he still had a sippy cup of water to go to sleep by. We share a family bed now that is me hubby, baby and our four year old who has a problem sleeping alone because he's afraid of the dark.

I'd put the crib in your room to make it easier on you if you don't want to cosleep, though remember, around one they have a growth spurt which means increased nursing for comfort and pain relief from the pain reducing hormones released in breastmilk.

Megan - posted on 11/28/2009

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Thanks for the input, unfortunately my husband works graveyard shift so no help there...



I've tried teething tablets, and I'm thinking of bringing his crib in our room but I feel like that might be a step back. Then again, at least he'll be in his crib and not in bed.I just don't like him in bed with me because I move a lot, and when my husband is home neither of us can sleep comfortably.



I've tried laying in his room on the floor while he fell asleep, it worked once and then never again!



So I guess I'll try bring the crib in, at least he'll be easier to get to and we can work from there...



Thanks Mommies!

Michelle - posted on 11/28/2009

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If you rock him and don't nurse him, will he eventually fall asleep? If he will, but it just takes longer, you may want to do this for a while and he will eventually fall asleep with the rocking and no nursing. Can someone else rock him to sleep? My son is 18 months old now, and I know that at one time I could've written your post. Now he almost always sleeps through the night and never nurses at night anymore.

When my goal was just to get him not to nurse anymore at night, I remember trying to bring him to bed with me when he would wake up and rub his back and refuse to let him nurse, but he would get so angry that I wouldn't let him nurse. And he would keep on waking up over and over because he knew I was next to him and that the boob was within reach, haha. Finally my husband just had to step up. When my son would wake up in the the middle of the night, he would go get him and rock him/lay down with him until he fell asleep, but not in our bedroom. Very quickly he realized he wasn't going to nurse when he woke up in the middle of the night, and at the same time he wasn't angry because it wasn't right there in his face. He still continued to wake up, but after the first week my husband was able to get him back to sleep in seconds to just a couple minutes, whereas with me it would have taken FOREVER if I didn't nurse him.

If this is a possibility, I would say try having it NOT be you who puts him back to sleep in the middle of the night. For me that's what it took. Without the nursing being involved, my son still sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night, but he goes back to sleep very easily and doesn't wake up when put down, something he never did before.

I hope this helps some how! Either way, just know that somehow it always works out! I have so many friends whose babies nursed at night and all of their children eventually slept on their own and through the night. Good luck!

April - posted on 11/28/2009

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my son is 11 months and does not sleep through the night either. he gets up 5 to 7 times to nurse. i don't rock him usually because it hurts my arm and nursing is soooo much easier and faster.



however, this is okay with me. it makes me feel better knowing he is easily comforted by me and that he is getting most of his nutrition at night (he doesn't like to nurse much during the day).



ok...now to answer your question, night time weaning is the last to go. you will need to gradually stop nursing during the day before you should even think about night time weaning. it is best to take it slow.



another suggestion...you COULD give him a blankey to fall asleep with, if you really don't want him using you as pacifier (i accidentally did this with my son when i thought he was cold. turned out that he would hold it and suck his thumb until he was asleep again...instead of using me) .



third suggestion....can you move his crib closer to your bed, so that he can be comforted by your breathing when you're asleep? or move your bed closer to his crib? my son sleeps better by being as close as possible to me without being in the same bed (i roll too much).



fourth suggestion...he might be teething. try teething tablets before bed. the kind i have is called little teethers and it is supposed to help with "excessive wakefulness", as well as make the gums feel better.



ok, that's all the suggestions i have for now. i keep on erasing my suggestions because i want to make sure i'm actually answering what you asked!

Megan - posted on 11/27/2009

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Yeah... My son did that too. He was sleeping ok and then it got worse and worse. I think I got lazy though, and would just rock till he was asleep. I feel like it's my fault and I don't know how to fix it.

Tara Lee - posted on 11/27/2009

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I wish I had the answer to this question also. My daughter is 14 months old and I nurse her to sleep every night. I can't but her in her crib awake and she usually ends up sleeping with me on the couch or in our bed.



She use to be a great sleeper, from day one until about 7 months old, now she's not.



I know this doesn't help you, but I just wanted you to know that you're not alone...

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