NO Change tables in a FAMILY restaurant

[deleted account] ( 34 moms have responded )

Ok so thought I would share this story... it happened almost a week ago and it still annoys me. We had taken a road trip to city about 5 hours away. We had planned everything perfectly to get home with as little stops and fussing as possible, so at our first stop we went into a restaurant for lunch. I walked into the bathroom to change my childs diaper only to find they had NO CHANGE TABLE. I walked out and asked an employee if they had one somewhere else (who doesn't have change tables these days?). The woman told me that they didn't have any due to the fact that they were unsanitary... Ok so normally they are in the bathroom, which is unsanitary on its own so who cares. My answer back to her was "well it will be more insanitary because I am changing her diaper on a table now!"

"Oh you can't do that."

I couldn't believe it, she went to go ask her manager if that would be ok. I told my hubby not to pay for our food until they allowed me to change her diaper because as far as I was concerned every establishment who allows children under 18 into their building should supply their patrons with a change table!! Needless to say I will not be stopping there again.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Carolyn - posted on 03/03/2011

898

19

140

I have to agree with Teresa here, changing a diaper where people eat is disgusting and rude imo. There is usually another option such as your vehicle ( i have done this numerous times while traveling and those wonderful breastfed poops fly up the back and all over the place ! ) I also carry around disposable change pads, as I have had to change a few diapers on the floor in a restroom ( its was bitter cold outside and baby was too big to change in the car without leaving a door open or haul out the car seat) lay down huge ass toss away diaper pad, change butt, throw away pad......



Its not the manager's or the staff's fault that there was no change table so to take it out on them is inappropriate in my eyes. Write a letter of complaint to head office, the people who can actually do something.

[deleted account]

This conversation is being locked due to numerous reported posts. Please review Circle of Mom's guidelines (posted below) and remember them while posting.

Thanks,
Sara
Admin

Our guidelines are simple and are meant to help maintain an atmosphere of generosity and respect, so that everyone can have a positive experience here. They can be boiled down to this: please always try to add value to this community rather than take it away. Also, keep the phrase "No T.H.U.M.P.S." in mind. It stands for


Threats (You may not publish or post direct, specific threats of violence or illegal acts against others.)


Hate Speech (No slurs or stereotyping.)


Unlawful Use (You may not use Circle of Moms for unlawful purposes or promotion of illegal activities. If it's illegal where you live or in the state of California it's illegal here.)


Misrepresentation (You must be who you say you are. No false profiles or false children's profiles.)


Personal attacks (You may not abuse, slander, or vilify another member.)


Spam (You may not publish or post solicitations or advertisements except in designated areas.)



Enjoy Circle of Moms!

Rachael - posted on 03/04/2011

558

22

71

so I can see myself getting reamed here for this but all I have to say is that I am glad I wasn't at the table next to you, because changing a diaper ON the table in the middle of an eating establishment is flat out DISGUSTING. As far as changing tables go, they are NOT REQUIRED BY LAW and are therefore seen as a convenience for establishments to provide you with not a right for patrons to have. I have found it frustrating to be caught without a changing table when I've needed one, but there is usually a MUCH safer, and more sanitary and mature option. Just so you are aware that manager would have had every right to call the police and have you escorted from the establishment and charged with theft had you attempted to leave without paying. I understand that as a mom you wanted only to help your child by changing a diaper that needed it, and that you ASSUMED that the facility would have a changing table (I make it a habit to ask on the way in because I know that it is not something that is required and often older and/or smaller restaurants simply do not have changing facilities) It is not an ideal situation, but a more mature solution would have been to express your disappointment and changed the baby in your car, or on the bathroom counter, or found another location that had a changing table. Allowing children under 18 into their establishment is not reason for a facility to have to undertake the expense for installing and sanitizing a changing table. Next time I suggest you do a bit more research on your road trips and call ahead to ensure that all your expectations will be met.

Tyrae - posted on 03/04/2011

609

10

112

This was actually rather humorus for me.

Truthfully no matter where you change your baby there is going to be germs. I have changed my daughter on a floor, on a couch, on a change table, on my lap, on the seat of my car, and if I needed to I'm sure I would do it on a table too. Everything gets cleaned eventually. And who's to say that someone who just went to the washroom, took a dump and didn't wash their hands then touch the table other people were to eat at wouldn't pass on germs like changing a baby would. It's all the same.

Now back to the change table issue. That is rather ridiculous, and if they aren`t going to supply a change table they should at least provide enough counter space in the washroom to change a diaper. For a ``FAMILY`` restaurant that`s just stupid. I wouldn`t go there again either. Good on you.

Noreen - posted on 03/04/2011

914

16

81

I guess I broke THUMBS by saying what you did was childish?! Oh well. "The point is that there was no changING table" Ok, we got the point. Thanks. Now why don't you lock your post and move on. Just because someone doesn't meet eye to eye with you doesn't mean that they are wrong. Jeez. The ones who said that changing your child on the table was gross, including myself also have a valid point. We were just giving other options on where you could have changed your kid instead of changing her on a table WHERE PEOPLE EAT! My goodness gracious. Grow up.

Oh, btw. What does this post have to do with breastfeeding?? BREASTFEEDING SUPPORT GROUP. Go whine about no changing table somewhere else please. :)

This conversation has been closed to further comments

34 Comments

View replies by

Renee - posted on 03/06/2011

14

5

2

One thing to remember is that change tables are not required by law but are usually provided for the convenience of the customer even if they are a family establishment. And the simple fact that they do not provide this convenience does not mean you should put the health of others at risk by changing a dirty diaper on a table where others eat. And to withhold payment of services rendered was not proper either. I know I talked about things that "aren't the point" but I believe they go hand in hand. I live in an area that only about half of public places have them and we have a large LDS population (which means a large population of children.)

[deleted account]

You didn't hurt my feelings, but I appreciate the apology. I apologize for hurting your feelings. It wasn't my intention to do so... just to make you think about how the action of changing a dirty diaper on a table in an eating establishment could be seen by others.

I don't have changing table issues anymore as my youngest will be 3 at the end of this month. ;)

Circle of Moms IS a wonderful place.

[deleted account]

Well I have called and found out that it is not required... but this restaurant was new, very clean and there bathrooms are quite big. BUT as a very new mom, and one who had not travelled with my child at all until this trip, I just assumed that a family restaurant would have the convenience of a change table. I do agree that I will call ahead or only go to the places I know have change tables in the future. As someone said at one point in time, we live and learn. I think that if moms demanded enough that all family restaurants supply mothers with a change table we could change things.
I did not come on here to fight with anyone, but when pushed I will push back. I am publically apologizing to Caroline and Teresa for possibly hurting your feelings, but mine were hurt too. As a new mother I came onto this website hoping for support and understanding and instead recieved ridicule and judgement. It makes me sad that such a wonderful and helpful tool such as circle of moms has been so dissapointing for me. So on that note I am done.

[deleted account]

i agree with you they should have changing tables in this day and age. i live in new york city and good luck finding a changing table, high chair or booster. i became really fast at changing my son's diaper either in the booth, (hiding him with my body and the table), i put a padded blanket on the floor (if necessary), i have changed him in the stroller (i lay it all the way down) and since he learned to stand up i became really good at changing him while he stands.

Carolyn - posted on 03/04/2011

898

19

140

okay okay so why is it not okay for people to say that it was disgusting to change your kids diaper on a table in the the restaurant, but it is okay for you to say its horrible and disgusting of me to cover any surface with a disposable change pad and lay my son down where the only thing he is touching is a clean disposable pad and change him.



"so if you want to call me a horrible person for changing my child in a warm restaurant instead of a filthy disgusting bathroom floor or the floor of my car that is fine, but 'IMO' that would make you horrible to do to your child too."



so in reality , according to your posts you broke the thumps.... i never said you were horrible, but that it was disgusting and rude to change an ass in the dining area of a restaurant.



I smell hipocrisy.



Your getting upset over people commenting on your choices, but sit there and judge mine. hmmmm.



im going to stop here because if i were to type how i really feel i would probably get myself a warning.



and yes change tables have nothing to do with breastfeeding.

Sandie - posted on 03/04/2011

239

4

65

so...everyone seems pretty disgusted that sydney chose to change her baby on a tablle because of bacteria etc, yet youre saying its ok to change a baby on the floor of a public bathroom which is absolutly covered in germs and bacteria, hundreds of people have walked on it, many of them having god knows what on their shoes, urine and feces flying everywhere everytime someone flushes a toilet. i would rather offer someone the table im eating from then disinfect it than let a lady change her infant on the floor. the point of this post seemed to me to be to find out if other mums have found a similar problem finding a place to change their babies, not to start a war over cleanliness. plus it sounds like the staff and manager were there when she changed the baby...so they obviously didnt have too much of a problem with it.

[deleted account]

Post whatever you want, but do not attack anyone for their choice. I am sure we have all made choices that we think are right and many people have disagreed with, but that doesn't make you rude, gross or selfish. Just protective of your childs well being. So back on task... CHANGE TABLES.

[deleted account]

Breaking THUMPS would be calling me a horrible person for changing my baby on the floor. I never once attacked you as a person and I never would. I just said what you DID was gross, rude, and selfish and I'll stand by that statement 100%.

And several people have stated that they would not have done what you did. I never would've even considered it.

I'm not complaining about what you said. Just what you did and the fact that you can not control how other people respond to your posting....

[deleted account]

OK and an update on the sistuation. The head office did call me back and they apparently did not build change tables into the design of their buildings. I was not the first one to bring up this issue and it will go down with the builders to take into consideration. I did however tell this person that I would unfortunatly never be eating at another one of their restaurants due to the lack of change tables. Which is unfortunate, but until they can cater to all our families needs I cannot in good conscience supply them with more business. This is probably the only way to get progress but thats the way she goes.

[deleted account]

OK... need I remind you of the quote at the bottom of everypost you write on here... powered by RESPECT not THUMPS!!! I am sorry my actions have upset you so, but I would imagine any mother would have done the same if you were in the same predicament as me. If my behavior disgust you that much then just don't post on here anymore!? How about that? This was my post, my experience and again the whole point was that a FAMILY RESTAURANT DID NOT HAVE A CHANGE TABLE.

[deleted account]

Well, if you want to control how people respond.... you've picked the wrong place.



I'm sorry you were upset at not having a changing table, but if the health department had seen what you had done that business would've been shut down. Kind of rude and selfish to do that to them if you think about it in that way.... But you are right. Your 'right' to change your baby whereever you want should 'of course' be WAY more important than the jobs of every single person that works there......

Minnie - posted on 03/04/2011

7,076

9

788

Hmmm....I imagine that you were very frustrated that there wasn't a changing table. However I'm not sure that those who are put off by you changing your baby's diaper on a table is a 'trivial' thing. Rotavirus can be spread like wildfire through feces.

I don't use changing tables either, and we use prefolds. I've either had her stand in the stall, sit on my lap facing me, or go to the front seat of our car.

[deleted account]

I have put a call into the head office and am waiting to hear back now. I would just think that by now we would be a little further ahead than this. i mean we have equal rights for women, wheelchair accessibility into public buildings, but not having change tables in public restaurants.... I could go further and say that we now have equal sporting opportunities for men and women (Title 9 in the US) but also no change tables in mens rooms... that puts more pressure on us women to always change the diapers... like the men need more excuses haha

[deleted account]

That does stink since you were planning on stopping to change and eat. I've done 4 trips from Texas to Ohio and we always changed my daughter in the car. Now that she's almost 2 I change her in the stall standing up. I'm not sure that the manager had much of a say in it. You might be able to inquire at their corporate office. I've been in some restaurants that have them and some that don't. I don't think it's mandatory, but it is more convenient for those that want to use them.

Sandie - posted on 03/04/2011

239

4

65

ive gotta say im with you sydney, id never change my son on the floor, even though i also have disposable changing mats, as much as i dont want to lie him on the ground i dont want to kneel on it either!! i have changed him in the boot of my parents car, but it was when we were in the middle of nowhere and had no choice. i probably wouldnt have changed him on the table but when he was little i have changed him in the middle of a cafe in his pram. i do think everyones getting a little bit excited, lol...

[deleted account]

WOW... the whole point to this was how restaurants should supply a change table for parents. Whether you choose to use it or not is your choice. so 'IMO' my only option was a table, so if you want to call me a horrible person for changing my child in a warm restaurant instead of a filthy disgusting bathroom floor or the floor of my car that is fine, but 'IMO' that would make you horrible to do to your child too. You have picked the most trivial event in this whole rant and made it a big deal. My point was that all family restaurants that supply a bathroom for the public should also supply parents with a change table.
AND AGAIN if you disagree with using it then don't... but restaurants do still clean the change table on a regular basis as well.

[deleted account]

I don't put much faith in studies, but I do know there HAVE been studies done that have shown floors are way cleaner than changing tables....

Post this on the welcome board and I can almost guarantee we are not in the minority..... ;)

Noreen - posted on 03/03/2011

914

16

81

I have to agree with Carolyn and Teresa. That is so GROSS! Do you know how many illness's are passed through feces and urine?! And then people are touching the table and eating off it. Yeah, you might have used a blanket and they might have cleaned it, but still. That is so childish IMO.

I have traveled a LOT in the last year (we moved from SC-CA) and even in the mountains in December when it was in the negatives I still changed my daughter in the floor board of the truck or on my lap with the door closed. She was 14months when we moved (to give you an idea on how big she was) I don't ever use changing tables and most definitely NOT restaurant tables to change my daughter. Changing tables are gross and disgusting and full of germs. Even if we are out and about running errands and such, I change her in the car.

Carolyn - posted on 03/03/2011

898

19

140

not like i laid him bare ass on the floor, nor do i lay him bare ass on a change table either. I can only hope you guys were the only ones in the restaurant because if you did that while other people were there eating.. well. anyways... im okay with being a minority for once ;)

[deleted account]

Well... I think the bathroom floor is more disgusting than a change table... I would NEVER put my kid on the floor... and to possibly "ease your mind". I put a blanket down on the table and had the lady clean the table before anyone else ever ate one it. I would have left, but the husband had already ordered our food. At the end of the day I will be letting them know, but it also was about -30 outside and out car was not big enough to change her inside. So thanks for the comment... and yes the two of you are for sure in the minority of this situation!

[deleted account]

You changed your baby's diaper on a table where people eat?! Gross! Why not in the front seat of your vehicle? I'm probably in the minority on this one, but I'd never use a changing table in public unless I had no other reasonable option. I hate thinking of all the nasty germs on those things from other people's kids.

[deleted account]

Any other situation and I probably would have wimped out too... but when it comes to my kid there is no backing down! The other place we stopped at on the way to our destination had the change table out side the stalls right in front of the sink... many people had a hard time washing their hands but at least there was a change table.

Sandie - posted on 03/03/2011

239

4

65

thats sooo annoying when that happens, it bugs me so much, theres limited places with change tables where i live, and then i limit the selection even more because some are horrific and disgusting, the best one is in quite an expensive bar/restaurant, i just walk in and then walk out after im done, feeling a little guilty for not buying anything, lol.
good for you for sticking to your guns though, i would probably have wimped out and found somewhere else, i wish i had the courage you have to stand your ground!!! :)

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms