weaning an older toddler

Lindsey - posted on 07/20/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 29 months and was still breastfeeding once during the day and in the morning and at night and sometimes in the middle of the night. I say was because she developed a virus where she had a sore on her throat and the dr. said for me not to nurse so my breast would not get the infection. So, I didn't for a day or two and it was awful so I let her nurse from just one side. SHe has done great not asking for it during the day but at night she fights me for it and screams and cries and it is so sad that I just want her to have it. We end up getting up at all hours to play so it distracts her. I know it is time to wean but what do any of you think I should do? I would appreciate any advice or comments. Has anyone else nursed this long and had this much trouble getting the child to stop.

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Sara - posted on 08/04/2013

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That sounds hard. My son is 29 months and still nursing a ton, day and night. I'm tired of the night nursing because while I used to be able to sleep through it, he now pinches the other breast while he nurses and it hurts.
It sounds to me like your daughter isn't ready to wean. You said you know she's ready to wean, and I'm curious what makes you think so? A friend of mine said her kids nursed until they were 3.5 at night only, like before bed. She said it was great be side breast milk cures all ills! Like the throat thing your dd had, I would imagine breast milk would've been the best thing for her.
But, if you think it's time to wean you need to get her on the same page. Maybe try acting a scene out with her dolls, like play acting the way you want your nursing life to be, (or not be:). Or make a book about her and night time, and say that at night we don't drink milk anymore so that she can grow big and strong and rest?
Good luck!!!

Paige - posted on 07/21/2009

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I used the Jay Gordon method to nightwean my 19 month old. It was relatively gentle and did not involve crying it out. http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/a...

For daytime sessions I did "don't offer, don't refuse" and applied a lot of distraction and redirection. I knew the times she was in the habit of nursing so I'd arrange to do other things at those times. Like awhen I got home from work we'd go to the playground and she'd forget about nursing.

Honestly though, once she night weaned she dropped her day time feedings pretty easily. I was also pregnant at the time and started drying up so that contributed as well.

Carrie - posted on 07/20/2009

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When i weaned (20mo) the night was the hardest to let go of. I just held him and sang him songs and rocked him/rubbed his back. I just tried to let him know that I was still there and still snuggled him. I also found that he was thirsty during those times and a cup of water helped a little bit, although he was still upset.

Good luck, and hang in there. As for her passing the virus to her, I'd check with a lactation consultant to see if that is even possible. I know that thrush can be passed... but not sure what other things can actually infect the breast AND the throat. Make sure your doc has the right information.

Etta - posted on 07/20/2009

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It sounds like she's not ready to wean. And if she's not feeling well, it may not be the right time to wean. She gets a lot of comfort for nursing.

If you really want to wean her right now, try to gradually introduce a routine where you can still cuddle and be close (read stories before bed, talk about your day, etc.). The night feeding is a hard one for her to quit. Let her know that you will still be there and you can still have that special time together even if she's not nursing.

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