disagreeable doctors

Megan - posted on 03/22/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I wrote this on another convo, but wanted to involve others...

Situation:my sister-in-law ends up with a doctor she had never met (because her doctor was not coming on duty for another hour yet, whatever) and he didn't agree with her on her desires when it came to her birthing ideas. She didn't want an episiotomy and he (practically without her permission) gave her one anyway!

I decided I didn't want that doctor (we were going to the same hospital), but when it came around to the event, my doctor (same as my sister-in-law's) wasn't on duty (not sure what was going on there) and guess what....that other doctor was the one I had. Because I ended up needing a c-section, I didn't have to worry about arguing with him about my natural birth plans, but what if I had been able to deliver naturally? What would I have had to do if he wanted to do something I didn't want to? Could I have asked for another doctor because he was condisending and not following what I wanted?

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Megan - posted on 04/11/2009

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Doctors are really helpful sometimes. They really do know what they are doing. I just wish they could always tell you why they are wanting to do the things they are wanted to do. If it's reasonable, I'm all for it. My C-section was because my placenta had detached and baby wasn't responding like he should have. I am actually happy it went the way it did. Everyone was save and healthy.
I am grouchy sometimes because doctors aren't always honest like they should be. My friend was there for another friends birth and she had never been to a birth. The mother was a first time mom and she didn't know exactly how it should go either. They weren't educated enough to be aware of their rights and how a birth "should" go. The doctor was impatient because he was late for a golf vacation and told the girl he suggested a c-section to speed things up. Because they didn't have anyone who knew this wasn't right, the c-section happened. I was horrified. I feel for moms who aren't given enough information to know if this is best for the health of everyone involved or just best for a doctor in a hurry.

Toni - posted on 04/11/2009

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I think we sometimes forget that these guys have had years and years of training and  have seen labour go terribly wrong and have a baby or a mother die. I don't think that they choose to 'play god' for their image or whatever, but because they don't want to see it all go horribly wrong, because if they made the wrong decision and let you carry on you or didn't intervene, you or your family would sue if anyone died or was brain damaged. That doesn't mean that your wishes shouldn't be taken into consideration, but I'm pretty sure that most of the doctors would do that. Yes some of you may have been able to have your babies with no intervention, how will you ever know? I would say if you don't want medical intervention then plan to have your baby at home with a mid wife, but be prepared to be rushed to hospital if things go wrong.



Did you know that in the old days before we had all this medical progress that 1 in 10 women, or their babies ,or both....died in childbirth. Think on that.



 



I had a c-section after I'd been in hard labour for 18 hrs. I had no pain relief other than gas and air as my epidural didn't work. My doctor decided I should have a emergency c-secion after there were no signs of any progress (fully dilated but no signs to push) and the babies heartbeat showed she was in distress. Without medical intervention either me or my baby could have died...100+ years ago before medical progress we probably would have. It's not something I like to think about and I'm glad it's something my doctor didn't take a chance with.

Melanie - posted on 04/08/2009

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I agree with the other replies. I would have demanded another doctor!! With my second pregnancy I had a terrible time with the doctors. They were all contradicting each other and they had no patience and were quite rude and cold towards my concerns and feelings. The midwives however were fantastic! Labour is a scary time for a woman and having an awful experience with the doctor can make it even more stressful!!!

Amanda - posted on 03/30/2009

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i would have thrown a fit if i had been your sister in law! as for the c-section i was in that same situation. i wanted to be induced (i had preeclampsia so they wanted the baby out that weekend) but the doctor kept arguing with me i felt like i was being bullied into a c-section. i caved after a while when my mom my Ex and the nurses joined in. but i really regret it! i think i definitely could have done it if i had tried! the doctor i had wasn;t my doctor because i had to be sent to another town to have my son. the hospital my doctor practiced at couldn't manage to get me in.

Jamie - posted on 03/24/2009

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Quoting Amanda:

If i had been in your sisters shoes, i would have yelled at the top of my lungs to get away from me, and TOLD them to get me another doctor. And if he did do the episiotomy on me anyways, i would have sued his ass.
When it comes to my body, or anyones body, you have control, not anyone else, not even a doctor!!


I totally agree. I had one doctor when I was at the hospital just leave, like went home right in the midist of all my issues. He wasnt my doctor but worked in the same office. So I ended up having to wait until another dr, still not my own, to come in to do my c-section. I was pist and the next time I saw that dr I let him know it. Needless to say he didnt come back to my room during recovery anymore.

Amanda - posted on 03/23/2009

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If i had been in your sisters shoes, i would have yelled at the top of my lungs to get away from me, and TOLD them to get me another doctor. And if he did do the episiotomy on me anyways, i would have sued his ass.

When it comes to my body, or anyones body, you have control, not anyone else, not even a doctor!!

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