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Not welcome at Church

Kristina - posted on 01/29/2010 ( 225 moms have responded )

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I am a single mother of four children, the oldest of which turned 4 a little over two weeks ago. I spent a lot of my life lost and recent found my path in life through God... But I've been unable to find a church that welcomes me and my children... or at least one that does not openly make it clear that we are unwelcome... I've even had one church tell me not to come back because I'm a bad person.... I have asked God's forgivness for my sins and been living a good and positive life, but still I am judged for my past. I am at a loss as to what to do... I would really like to attend church and have my children meet other positive Christian influences (my family is not very religious, they acknowledge God, but mostly blame him for the bad things their lives and never praise him for the good things in their lives) I'm begining to feel as though I'll never find a church where my children and I will be accepted.... What do I do?

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Heather - posted on 01/30/2010

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My suggestion is to first pray for the churches that you have been too. Pray that God will help them to be more welcoming in the future for His names sake. Also pray that God will lead you to the church that is right for your family.

My next suggestion is to google churches in your area. Look at the websites, look at what they tell you about children in the church and look at their mission statement or the aim of the church. When you find one that you are interested in attending, send the pastor an e-mail. Explain your situation, and that you would like to start attending church, but have been told by other churches that you were not welcome. Explain that you have four young children, and ask the pastor if you would be welcome to attend there. If it is a church that is worth your time, the pastor should e-mail you back saying that of course you are welcome, and answer any questions that you may have. Pray about it. I will pray for you too.

Debra - posted on 02/15/2010

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No one has the right to judge you by your past. Now, if God forgave and I know He has then we are to do the same. You will find the right church. When, you do you will be blessed by that church and you will be a blessing for that church body. You can be an example to them and teach them of what not to do and God can build your ministry around that. Hang tough and let God do it. Ask Him to order your footsteps and show you where to go. We all have a past. I have one and some of it I am not too proud of, but with God I am pressing forward and I would you and the children to do the same.

Jay Jay - posted on 02/02/2010

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You should attend a church that has sunday school or that will watch the children while you are at prayer. Im not sure where you live but you should find a church that provide childcare or that will teach your children christian principles.

Janette - posted on 01/29/2010

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Hello Kristina, This is one verse where God speaks about his compassion towards us. I hope that this verse encourages you. "As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. Just as a father has compassion on his children, So the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him. For He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust." Psalm 103:12-14 You may want to read the whole chapter because it is so rich. Obviously, every person has sinned and fallen short of God's glory. It was due to his compassion on us that we are even able to be forgiven. Some people judge others but in the meantime are having difficulty seeing their own sinful actions/thoughts. In Matthew 7:1-6 Jesus addresses the subject of hypocritical attitudes, (I will quote verse 2) "And why do you look at the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?". Being rejected, having scornful looks thrown your way, or being judged can be extremely hurtful. It is the last thing in the world that any Christian should be doing. It takes maturity on the parts of men and women in the church to embrace those that are newer believers or those returning from the world. I encourage you to keep seeking a church. You may want to try to find a mom's group or a smaller Bible study within a church- one that would minister to your direct needs. Really commit this issue to prayer. At this point, accountability might be a great thing for you, finding a mentor or at least one other Christian lady with kids. Someone who has maybe been through a similar circumstance. It might take awhile to get to know others ladies and moms but don't give up. Don't let glaring eyes keep you away either. Just realize that it is spiritual immaturity on their part. My husband and I will pray for you today. Please write an update in the next few weeks. Janette

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Angela - posted on 02/17/2010

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Kristina, i am so sorry to here those things about other so called christians treating you and your family that way....I pray that by now maby you have been lead to a prayer house of worship if not continue to talk to God about it He will defenantly guide you to one....just continue to thank Him for leading you don' t let the fact that you are not in one get you down or lessen your faith in the Almighty. Blessings to you!

Melissa - posted on 02/17/2010

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WOW!! Your topic struck me as utter shock. Not sure where you are living but do not take it personal (i know that is hard). This a problem in the church not with you. You are loved my the Lord and commended for wanting you raise your children with a Godly upraising. The chuch is not a place but rather people who form the church. These people have a serious problem and do not understand God's love. They have no right to judge you, It is by His grace that you are forgiven not others. Do not give up. The Lord will guide you to where He wants you and until then know He is streching you, testing your faith and making a way for you exactly where He wants you for His purpose He has for you. Persever and you will delight in Him.

Jeanne - posted on 02/17/2010

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It breaksmy heart to hear your cries for acceptance. You will find judgemental people everywhere. However, God's love is forgiving and this is the only way for you to move forward in your journey. Bring the good news to church and let them remember why Jesus died on the cross, to forgive us our sins. You have a mission to teach people how to forgive . You are a perfect example of the most important commandments "Love God weith ALL your heart, ALL your Soul, and ALL your mind, and "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBORS AS YOU LOVE YOURSELF" go back into that church and share this message with those who criticize you. They will be everywhere and you need to walk in confidence with God to share this message for them to learn the real meaning of GOd's love .... no matter what church you decide to attend!. Pray for God's guidance and do not fear your enemies, pray for them.

Jeanne - posted on 02/17/2010

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It breaksmy heart to hear your cries for acceptance. You will find judgemental people everywhere. However, God's love is forgiving and this is the only way for you to move forward in your journey. Bring the good news to church and let them remember why Jesus died on the cross, to forgive us our sins. You have a mission to teach people how to forgive . You are a perfect example of the most important commandments "Love God weith ALL your heart, ALL your Soul, and ALL your mind, and "LOVE YOUR NEIGHBORS AS YOU LOVE YOURSELF" go back into that church and share this message with those who criticize you. They will be everywhere and you need to walk in confidence with God to share this message for them to learn the real meaning of GOd's love .... no matter what church you decide to attend!. Pray for God's guidance and do not fear your enemies, pray for them.

Dasha - posted on 02/17/2010

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I encourage you to look for a family integrated church. They embrace children and families with children!! Pray and ask God to send you where you need to be, so you can be ministered to as a single mother also!! Please update us as to your situation. We will pray for you and your children!!

Shirley - posted on 02/17/2010

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i realy feel for u.if u lived near me,my church would love to have join our church.i once made a comment about my 30 yr. old nephew and the metal on his face to my paster.he very quickly told me( judge not). we are a very loving and foregiving church.hope u can find a church like mone.god bless u.

Beth - posted on 02/17/2010

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don't give up! I found a church that excepted me and I was going threw a devorce and became pregnant with my boyfreinds child. I thought for sure I would be rejected. and they have now become my second familey and my daughter turns 13 this year. I find it so hipacritical of a church that rejects anyone. God didn't gather around the good peopel he went to those who needed his help. and that is what every good church and members should do. I am proud to say that Brickerville United Luthern Church is my church and would recomend anyone to visit us. Gods Love, Beth

Malinda - posted on 02/17/2010

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Hi,,You mentioned wanting to find good Christians for your children to grow up around, And that is very important.So that church did you a favor, would you want your children to learn that kind of behaviour and turn around and treat a single mother in their future as you were treated?

Keep looking, you'll find someone that's walking in the love of Christ, and their church will reflect that. In the meantime to help you search, go to ShiningLight.org and in the tabs you'll find a place where you can put in your city and state and do a search through our web-site to find a church in your town. It's worth a shot..

I helped run the Children's Ministry in my church, And I can't even fathom someone telling you not to come back as your a bad person, when they had to see your children, by sending you away, they also sent your children away, we need to pray for them to seek forgiveness, They were wrong...

If you live in Florida let me know, i'll help you find a church...Or let me know anyway,, the internet is a powerful tool,,,we'll find you a church...

Ellen - posted on 02/16/2010

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Well first of all, any church that makes you feel unwelcome is not right with God and they too will be judged. I praise God that you are seeking a church home. when I and my family were looking for our church home we prayed and asked God to guide us in the right direction. I go to a first assemblies Church of God church where every one is welcome. after all, what's the point in trying to save people who are already saved? God wants people who are lost, people from all walks of life to come to him for forgiveness. If you go to a church that dosen't welcome you or makes you feel uncomfortable then that church is probably just a social club and isn't going to teach you much about the word of God anyway. Keep seeking and you will find.

Lisa - posted on 02/16/2010

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Kristina - I pray that by the time I have posted, you have finally found your church family. You are not alone, we went to many, many churches before we found a welcoming church. Do not be afraid to try different denominations. We found a great church that has a very active children's ministry. We saw an ad in the local newspaper for their t-ball league, 5 years latter I even coach! You and your beautiful children are in my thoughts and prayers. God has a plan for you, keep praying and seeking his guidance.

Brigitte - posted on 02/16/2010

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"Before you were in your mother's womb I knew you" If The Lord drew you to Him then He will provide a church for you adn your children to grow in the Lord...my suggestion is if its possible find a few churches and see if they have outreach ministries,helping the hurting if they advertise this then check it out also most churches in thoer church programme or bulltin will have a place for "What they Believe" this is the church beliefs based on Bible teachings.There will always be judgemental Christians plus hypocrites sitting in the church pews this is for God to deal with...alot of people dont know the ctruggles of a single mother so they are at a loss of how to approach with any encouragment..find a church that helps others as yourself which may take some effort but no matter the denomination if they have the Love of God in them then you will be welcomed. I go to a Non-Denominational church and I have a ugly past but have been welcomed with open arms and been helped in many ways while I struggle..there aare those in there sitting in the pews that have ridiculed me yrs gone by but God has vindicated me in more ways then one...its amazing God promises to take care of those that have little ones so be encouraged He knows your heart and will open all the right doors for and your children..God Bless You;))

Annie - posted on 02/15/2010

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Dear Kristina, believe it or not, that 'church' did you a service by telling you not to come back. Being new to going to church and such, you will just have to find one that you like. I, too, have been to many church's where you didn't particularly feel welcomed, or feel the Holy Spirit. There are plenty of people who sit in church and pass judgement on others, with their nose's in the air, these are not true Christians, and THEY need your prayers. Maybe you can ask around and find out what church most people in town would suggest, and find one that when you walk in, you feel at home. I will pray for you and your children, and as a Christian, I ask you to return the favor and pray for me and my family. God Bless you.

Ana - posted on 02/15/2010

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I am very sorry. Everyone has given wonderful advise and Praise God for his truth will prevail! My prayers are with you for you and your family to find the church body God has for you where you will all grow and be Loved as you should be. If there was no other person on this earth, Jesus still would have came so that you could live on in eternity. There is a church for you and your family, keep looking till you find it. Until then, keep in the word, pray with your beautiful family, and Praise, Worship and Thank God for the Answers. God Bless

Darcel - posted on 02/15/2010

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After reading 200 different opinions some bashing churches they have never visited I would like to give you a different opinion.

The bible saids that those who hunger and thirst after righteousness will be filled. So you have to look for God and his word, not a church that will "accept you." When you are "looking for a church" you are depending on God to lead you to where he wants you to worship him. Although you think you are being judged you may just be feeling God closing that door and telling you that is not your "church home."

When God works we may not always understand how, why, or his methods, so we may misinterpet based on our own insecurites and emotions. Pray for God to guide to you this word and his rightesousness, not to a church that "accepts you." God's people will accept you, love you and yes correct you when needed. They will tell you the truth when it hurts, give you "space" to develop a personal relationship with the Lord, love your children and embrace them as their own. The minister will teach the word of God from the bible, not apologize when it offends, be kind & compassionate, and most importantly lead an example of a Godly life. Finally you will feel the spirit of the God during service.

If you pray and look for righteousness, you will find the right place for your family to worship.

Debra - posted on 02/15/2010

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No one has the right to judge you by your past. Now, if God forgave and I know He has then we are to do the same. You will find the right church. When, you do you will be blessed by that church and you will be a blessing for that church body. You can be an example to them and teach them of what not to do and God can build your ministry around that. Hang tough and let God do it. Ask Him to order your footsteps and show you where to go. We all have a past. I have one and some of it I am not too proud of, but with God I am pressing forward and I would you and the children to do the same.

Lindsay - posted on 02/15/2010

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Oh my goodness, I am so sorry that churches have treated you that way. No one should judge you for your past, that is between you and the Lord. Taking your children to church and teaching them about the Lord shows that you are a good mother, My advice in this situation would be to keep praying for God to lead you in the right place, to bring you to the place where you were meant to be, pray God will bring someone into your life who will lead you there. Dont let this negativity keep you and your children from growing closer with to God. I pray that you will find a church that will welcome you and your children with open arms. God Bless.

Elisa - posted on 02/15/2010

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That has happened in the past to our family at many churches.I believe while most Christians are just trying to be fallowers of Christ and not be judgmental, there are many who just plain think that they can judge! Everyone I know has done it, even if we don't even know it. I just remember the "stone".I cant throw the first one or the 50th..And remember even at the best of churches there will be those who will,avoid, judge, and make you feel just not welcome ect. TRUTH-GOD chose for you too,your sins are forgiven in his eyes.you can make your apalogies on earth if you had to, but what matters is the motives and the spirit of the Lord in your heart. I Keep thinking my mistakes made me a bad Christian, still feel it sometimes, but now I fallow what God has to say. Hard one to learn-trust. Don't always get it right. It took me so long to be saved and then not dought, now to trust God's timing and grace is a growing thing .In trouble he will be with me, may not always take me out of it.Psalm 91 is good.

So what can you do, get as close to our Lord and Savior as you can, give him your whole heart and keep reaching out to him, and you can always keep praying for those Chritiansthat are not showing Christ in their actions and they dont see it. I that know how you feel and only want to be accepted for who and what we are-children of God, not one better than the other no matter how good they seem.

It is hard but try not to let that feelling through of being judged,just pray God opens their eyes and they see that the are judging if only by actions, advice etc...Trying to turn my thoughts of this positive has taken lots of time and prayer,His word, and reaching out to other "not perfect"poeple. There are none except Jesus himself

Rachel - posted on 02/14/2010

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keep looking my friend!! GOD would not turn you away!! These places would turn JESUS himself away!! And have by not accepting you!! We all fall short of the glory of GOD and need JESUS!! These people have no right to judge you, stay the course and find those kids a church home!! My mom was a single mother of four and made sure we were in church, I'm soooooo thankful to her for that!!! You can do it. Be strong and of good courage!!

Bambi - posted on 02/14/2010

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don't be terrible discouraged if a church dos not reply as I am finding out that there are alot of pastors that don't do computers well... maybe include the church secretary in the email. Our church welcomes all families ..I was a single parent and raised my 3 sons up in our church with great men to go to for help! We're Dover Baptist Church in Dover NH if you anywhere near there come on over. Our pastor says he can preach louder than any crying kids cause he's had 4 of his own!

Adrienne - posted on 02/14/2010

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What a sad reflection of Christ so many of us are! Please do not stop your search! God is so grieved by the reception you and your children have been given! To be practical in what to do, find a larger church with a well founded childrens program. They will have many resources for you and your children. The church should be a source of help and guidance in your life not what you have found. Please remember that we (Christians) are sinful people that are all in different spots on our journey to be more like Christ. I pray that you find a church with more people farther down the path of Godliness.

Adrienne - posted on 02/14/2010

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What a sad reflection of Christ so many of us are! Please do not stop your search! God is so grieved by the reception you and your children have been given! To be practical in what to do, find a larger church with a well founded childrens program. They will have many resources for you and your children. The church should be a source of help and guidance in your life not what you have found. Please remember that we (Christians) are sinful people that are all in different spots on our journey to be more like Christ. I pray that you find a church with more people farther down the path of Godliness.

Debie - posted on 02/14/2010

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Where are you from? There are many good Bible believing churches out there. Keep searching and praying that God will lead you to a kind and caring church. You can read in TImothy about how his mother and grandmother raised him to love the Lord even in the absence of his father. I know it is hard, but with God's grace and perseverance you can do it!!!!

Joan - posted on 02/14/2010

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"Ask and you shall receive...Knock and the door will be opened..." Our Heavenly Father is a loving father and He has good things in store for you. Let Him guide you. Continue to pray. He will lead you to the Church that will best provide what you and your family need to better know Him, love Him and serve Him. Be patient. It will be worth it. It was while the Hebrews remained in the desert that their faith grew and He rewarded their faithfulness with entry into the promised land. Your promised land is waiting for you. Stand firm in your faith. Trust in Him and you will be rewarded too. St. Paul says, "Give thanks to the Lord in all circumstances." It is in the trials of life that God reveals His power to us and the world. Let Him use you and in the end you will be a witness to His greatness. After all, as Christians, isn't that what we're called to be?



I will pray for you.

Sheila - posted on 02/14/2010

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I have never heard of such thing but the devul is in the church. Ask God to direct you to the church he would have you and your kids worship. I wnt through something like that but they want me to speak my sin of having my my daughter out of wedlock. The only person I answer to is God and God alone. If you were treated that way just imagine what type of other unholy spirits is in those churches. That is not what God has for you. Be encourage because God has a church for you and your children.

Pamela - posted on 02/14/2010

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I waned to cry when I read your post. EVERYONE sins and we all fall short of God's perfect plan but thankfully He is a loving and forgiving God. We all have different stories of how we came to know His grace and no one is less important then the other. Please do not give up in your search for a church. You need Christian friends for encouragement and that can help you grow spiritually, also, you are correct in that your children need Christian friends. Try to keep your head up and keep searching. There are many good churches out there and God will lead you to one. Pray daily for God's leading and I will pray for you also. I have a daily prayer sheet and will remember you on it. God is good...keep trusting!



By the way, I am the Pastor's wife at Faith Baptist Church in Lake City, FL and if you were to live in this area and attending, I would accept you with a warm hug! :-) I also know of great churches across the country...if you ever wanted to contact me I may be able to help you in your search.



HERE IS A VIRTUAL HUG FOR YOU! :-)

Susan - posted on 02/14/2010

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Do you live in Chattanooga? If so come visit us at Signal Mountain Church of Christ.

Michele - posted on 02/14/2010

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Not sure where you are located but I live in the Tampa area and I attend a church who invite all- It is a place where you Belong believe and become all that Christ ahs for you- I am a single parent and I can assure you we would welcome you with open arms- Celebration Church in Tampa-

A church should be a place of refuge and a place where you can grow in Christ- Keep Seeking and asking HIm to guide you in the write direction

http://www.celebrationchurchtampa.com/in...

Michele - posted on 02/14/2010

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Not sure where you are located but I live in the Tampa area and I attend a church who invite all- It is a place where you Belong believe and become all that Christ ahs for you- I am a single parent and I can assure you we would welcome you with open arms- Celebration Church in Tampa-

A church should be a place of refuge and a place where you can grow in Christ- Keep Seeking and asking HIm to guide you in the write direction

http://www.celebrationchurchtampa.com/in...

Heidi - posted on 02/14/2010

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I do not know where you live but in any area I am sure you can find a "True" Christian church. That is absurd that anyone claiming to call them self a "Christian" - literally translated- "Christ follower" would tell you that you are a bad person!!!! I am so dumbfounded that this has happened to you not only once but multiple times?!! It almost sounds so unreal that it couldn't be true!! I am not trying to say it isn't true- I am just so deeply hurt for you that you have had to endure such unrighteous judgment in your beginning walk with the Lord!!!! If you have not found a church to call home yet please respond to my post so I may stay in contact with you to make sure you get plugged-in to a family of believers that lines up with God's Word!! It is unrealistic of course to expect to find any pastor or church that is perfect since there is no such thing, however there are many Christians who are not hypocrites and bad examples such as you have experienced!!! The main thing is to find a church who is in line with God's Word- this includes forgiveness and moving forward with our eyes set on today, not yesterday and not dwelling on the past. Of course we have consequences for our sins and mistakes but that is not something that strangers should have any right to judge you for and that is your own personal life decisions!!! If you are a Believer and have asked Jesus into your heart then all anyone else who calls them self a believer should be concerned with is helping you to grow and learn how to strengthen your personal relationship with Jesus. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you!!!?



Heidi

Heidi - posted on 02/13/2010

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I do not know where you live but in any area I am sure you can find a "True" Christian church. That is absurd that anyone claiming to call them self a "Christian" - literally translated- "Christ follower" would tell you that you are a bad person!!!! I am so dumbfounded that this has happened to you not only once but multiple times?!! It almost sounds so unreal that it couldn't be true!! I am not trying to say it isn't true- I am just so deeply hurt for you that you have had to endure such unrighteous judgment in your beginning walk with the Lord!!!! If you have not found a church to call home yet please respond to my post so I may stay in contact with you to make sure you get plugged-in to a family of believers that lines up with God's Word!! It is unrealistic of course to expect to find any pastor or church that is perfect since there is no such thing, however there are many Christians who are not hypocrites and bad examples such as you have experienced!!! The main thing is to find a church who is in line with God's Word- this includes forgiveness and moving forward with our eyes set on today, not yesterday and not dwelling on the past. Of course we have consequences for our sins and mistakes but that is not something that strangers should have any right to judge you for and that is your own personal life decisions!!! If you are a Believer and have asked Jesus into your heart then all anyone else who calls them self a believer should be concerned with is helping you to grow and learn how to strengthen your personal relationship with Jesus. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you!!!?



Heidi

Robyn - posted on 02/13/2010

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It grieves me greatly that you have been treated this way by those that claim to be Christians. We have had certain church members tell others in our community that they were not welcome at our church because of their race/ethnicity. This was the opinion of only a handful of members, not the church as a whole. Luckily, our pastor was able to clear up the situation and these community members have become much loved members. I encourage you to continue to pray for God to lead you to a church home in which you will be welcomed as you are, taught and encouraged to follow Biblical principles, and are lifted up in prayer.

Denise - posted on 02/13/2010

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Kristina - I hope you have not given up...it is a sad fact that sometimes God's people don't act Godly and forget thier own past sin and sin in thier judgment. I admire you for being the mom that you are and desiring to rear your children in THE Way. Continue to search for the place Jesus has set asside for you and pray for those who will uphold you and assist you in growing in Christ. Your sister in Christ Denise

Michelle - posted on 02/13/2010

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Kristina,



As we all have said, it is not right that other Christians have shamed you and turned you away from their churches. The Lord loves us all and just keep praying about it and he will lead you to the right place. Don't hold judgement for all who have judged you, let God do that. Untill you do find a church, might I sugest going to Joel Osteen's website (www.joelosteen.com), make a free account and after doing that you can go to the Broadcast option at the top of the page, then on the left of the broadcast page you will see Video Streaming, click that which will take you to the page to watch either live services or services from previous weeks. He is so uplifting along with his wife Victoria, their words will lift you up and make your heart sing!!! I watch these if I go to my church or not. I know this would be a pure blessing to you. I wish you the best of luck, hold your head high, keep walking in faith and let the Lord guide you because he will!!!

GOD BLESS YOU!!! In Christ's love....

Michelle

Leanne - posted on 02/13/2010

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First and most important, pray!!! Ask God to lead you exactly where he wants you and your children. Second, keep looking - don't give up. The church that is right for you and your family will be one that shows the love of Jesus - unconditional. Be encouraged!!!

Leanne - posted on 02/13/2010

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First and most important, pray!!! Ask God to lead you exactly where he wants you and your children. Second, keep looking - don't give up. The church that is right for you and your family will be one that shows the love of Jesus - unconditional. Be encouraged!!!

Aliexsa - posted on 02/13/2010

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*in tears*....... I am taken back after reading your post! If you are in the NY Westchester area please visit The Fountain of Eternal Life in Mt. Kisco,NY. You and your children will be embraced with love and compassion (We have a wonderful children's ministry)! We who call ourselves CHRISTians are to be Christ like. How could people forget what Christ has brought them through......We who are in Christ are not much different than those whom are "lost". We are all sinners alike! How can we be servants of Christ if we are not like him.

Kristina my dear keep your focus on Christ, man will always disappoint you, we are not perfect.

Affirmation of his love for you:

"For God so loved the WORLD (that's me & you) that he gave his one and only Son, that WHOEVER (that's me & you again) believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. FOR GOD DID NOT SEND HIS SON INTO THE WORLD TO CONDEMN THE WORLD, BUT TO SAVE THE WORLD THROUGH HIM. John 3:16-17

Pray for those who continue to judge you and hand it over to God. He has already forgiven you don't let anyone tell you different!

"Come now let us reason together," says the Lord.

"Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. Isaiah 1:18

Don't lose focus of your future as a child of Christ-

"Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. For your Maker is your husband- the Lord Almighty is his name-the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.

Isaiah 54:4-5

If you need to talk or simply prayer please feel free to reach out to the Women of Wisdom Women's Ministry at the Fountain our email is wow.womensministry@gmail.com

God Bless you and your family sister! Will keep you and yours in prayer!

Mandi - posted on 02/12/2010

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O Kristina! I have no doubt that what people are putting you and your children through breaks the heart of God! This is not the way it is supposed to be. I am so happy for you that you have found your way back to God. I also experienced a time that I had gotten away and Praise the lord that he found me! I encourage you to please keep looking for a church! I have no doubt that these people are being used by satan to keep you from digging in with God and being rooted in a church! I will be praying for you, and when you find the church God wants you in, please let me know, so i can celebrate with you!!!

Claudia - posted on 02/12/2010

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I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Unfortunately, it's not that uncommon. Most churches are social clubs. Social clubs all have their share of "misfits." Not that you're a misfit! You are who Jesus came for. Sadly, churches judge their "health" by how many socially acceptable cliques (groups) they have. They have difficulty incorporating anyone who doesn't fit properly. Single women have an especially difficult time. Look for other single Moms, & stay away from the men. Other women will be suspicious of you & won't want you around their husbands or boyfriends. All other single women will see you as competition. Hopefully, you'll find another Mom like yourself that's more interested in real friendship and not paranoid. Always try to remember that Jesus is your husband now, & He's the best. Focus on your relationship with Him and what He wants to accomplish in you through this trial. Trust that He sees & knows what you're going through and does have a plan. He is your solution-not a church. Keep looking & trust your kids to help choose where to go.

God Bless You!

Tricia - posted on 02/12/2010

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I am not sure where you live but if you happen to be in Orange County, CA, I would highly recommend Rock Harbor in Costa Mesa. I would imagine that you would be welcome and feel welcome. It is so great that you have found the grace and forgiveness of Jesus Christ!

Michelle - posted on 02/12/2010

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I also wanted to add that you have to make sure you are not judging them as well. Maybe the feeling that you may have gotten was misinterpreted. If there is one that you went to and thought "maybe" go again and see what happens.. i was looking for a church years back and went to one and no one "went out of their way" to make me feel comfortable. Maybe they didnt want to jump on me and scare me away! I went to an open house they had and they turned out to be very welcoming and the church seemed like a great place!!!!!!

Michelle - posted on 02/12/2010

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There is a church out there that will accept you!!! Please pray and dont give up! Look online if you havent already and look for churches with maybe a single mother's ministry. Larger churches will probably have more to offer and have a larger mix of people where you can be accepted for the family that God has given you. Regardless of these things, if the church truely has God's heart, they will accept you no matter what! Please keep trying!

[deleted account]

Okay...well first of all let me say that the Churches you have been going to are wrong for treating you & your family that way. God is God no matter what. We all have a past. Guess what...we all sin everyday & God still loves us & God still forgives us. Let me encourage you to read or continue to read the Word of God daily. Just focus on Him & His love for you & your beautiful family. God will deal with those that have treated you wrong.

We are to God first and to love others as ourself. I am non-denominational. I believe in God and all He is. I believe God is the same yesterday, today & forever. I believe God heals, delivers, loves & changes our hearts when we let Him. You keep seeking God because He is ALWAYS there. You are HIS Child & God Almighty Loves His Children.

Make sure to read His Word daily & don't think God is one way or the other based on how you have been treated. God is God & the only way we can really, really know Him is through His Word, a deep prayer life with Him & walking with Him everyday.

I just wonder what Churches you are going to that have it so backwards. Its so sad too because we are all there to learn & worship God but so many times people get mistreated & decide to quit going to Church or seeking God. You just keep on seeking God because He loves you & you are His Child & so are your own children. Let me apologize to you that you have even experienced such negativity in a Church. Also, make sure that you realize that you are worthy to live for God because we are ALL sinners saved by the grace of God Almighty through our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. Its so unfortunate that people can be so haughty. I hope that when I get to heaven God is pleased with me. I fear for those that have the "better that everyone else" attitude that discourage others from worshiping God. You keep on trusting God. It doesn't matter what we do as long as we keep truly seeking God. He will change you & me according to His plans for us. I pray that you never allow anyone to take that away from you. Its your choice who you serve. It is not anyone elses business how you live or have lived your life because the closer you get to God the more you realize He just wants us to know Him, love Him and seek Him everyday. He will convict us according to His plans. We learn how to live through the Word of God and it sounds like you experienced "pharasie" type people who don't know God themself but think they do. Those people will not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven the Bible is very clear on that. Pray for them. Trust God and read, read, read the Word of God everyday. Even when you realize all the wrong things you have done on your past & even the sins of that day just trust that God forgives you & believe that He does, forgive yourself, continue to seek Him & change, turn away from sin once you realize it was sin and seek Him everday, all the time.

[deleted account]

Okay...well first of all let me say that the Churches you have been going to are wrong for treating you & your family that way. God is God no matter what. We all have a past. Guess what...we all sin everyday & God still loves us & God still forgives us. Let me encourage you to read or continue to read the Word of God daily. Just focus on Him & His love for you & your beautiful family. God will deal with those that have treated you wrong.

We are to God first and to love others as ourself. I am non-denominational. I believe in God and all He is. I believe God is the same yesterday, today & forever. I believe God heals, delivers, loves & changes our hearts when we let Him. You keep seeking God because He is ALWAYS there. You are HIS Child & God Almighty Loves His Children.

Make sure to read His Word daily & don't think God is one way or the other based on how you have been treated. God is God & the only way we can really, really know Him is through His Word, a deep prayer life with Him & walking with Him everyday.

I just wonder what Churches you are going to that have it so backwards. Its so sad too because we are all there to learn & worship God but so many times people get mistreated & decide to quit going to Church or seeking God. You just keep on seeking God because He loves you & you are His Child & so are your own children. Let me apologize to you that you have even experienced such negativity in a Church. Also, make sure that you realize that you are worthy to live for God because we are ALL sinners saved by the grace of God Almighty through our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. Its so unfortunate that people can be so haughty. I hope that when I get to heaven God is pleased with me. I fear for those that have the "better that everyone else" attitude that discourage others from worshiping God. You keep on trusting God. It doesn't matter what we do as long as we keep truly seeking God. He will change you & me according to His plans for us. I pray that you never allow anyone to take that away from you. Its your choice who you serve. It is not anyone elses business how you live or have lived your life because the closer you get to God the more you realize He just wants us to know Him, love Him and seek Him everyday. He will convict us according to His plans. We learn how to live through the Word of God and it sounds like you experienced "pharasie" type people who don't know God themself but think they do. Those people will not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven the Bible is very clear on that. Pray for them. Trust God and read, read, read the Word of God everyday. Even when you realize all the wrong things you have done on your past & even the sins of that day just trust that God forgives you & believe that He does, forgive yourself, continue to seek Him & change, turn away from sin once you realize it was sin and seek Him everday, all the time.

[deleted account]

Okay...well first of all let me say that the Churches you have been going to are wrong for treating you & your family that way. God is God no matter what. We all have a past. Guess what...we all sin everyday & God still loves us & God still forgives us. Let me encourage you to read or continue to read the Word of God daily. Just focus on Him & His love for you & your beautiful family. God will deal with those that have treated you wrong.

We are to God first and to love others as ourself. I am non-denominational. I believe in God and all He is. I believe God is the same yesterday, today & forever. I believe God heals, delivers, loves & changes our hearts when we let Him. You keep seeking God because He is ALWAYS there. You are HIS Child & God Almighty Loves His Children.

Make sure to read His Word daily & don't think God is one way or the other based on how you have been treated. God is God & the only way we can really, really know Him is through His Word, a deep prayer life with Him & walking with Him everyday.

I just wonder what Churches you are going to that have it so backwards. Its so sad too because we are all there to learn & worship God but so many times people get mistreated & decide to quit going to Church or seeking God. You just keep on seeking God because He loves you & you are His Child & so are your own children. Let me apologize to you that you have even experienced such negativity in a Church. Also, make sure that you realize that you are worthy to live for God because we are ALL sinners saved by the grace of God Almighty through our Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. Its so unfortunate that people can be so haughty. I hope that when I get to heaven God is pleased with me. I fear for those that have the "better that everyone else" attitude that discourage others from worshiping God. You keep on trusting God. It doesn't matter what we do as long as we keep truly seeking God. He will change you & me according to His plans for us. I pray that you never allow anyone to take that away from you. Its your choice who you serve. It is not anyone elses business how you live or have lived your life because the closer you get to God the more you realize He just wants us to know Him, love Him and seek Him everyday. He will convict us according to His plans. We learn how to live through the Word of God and it sounds like you experienced "pharasie" type people who don't know God themself but think they do. Those people will not inherit the Kingdom of Heaven the Bible is very clear on that. Pray for them. Trust God and read, read, read the Word of God everyday. Even when you realize all the wrong things you have done on your past & even the sins of that day just trust that God forgives you & believe that He does, forgive yourself, continue to seek Him & change, turn away from sin once you realize it was sin and seek Him everday, all the time.

Kelly - posted on 02/11/2010

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I am appalled that a church would turn you away! I am so sorry to hear that. I don't know what kind of church that did that, but thats not the place for you and your kids. Bless you for trying to find a church to worship in and to teach your kids about God. Thats the best place for all of you. I don't know where you live, but look in the phone book and find a bible believing baptist church in your area. They should welcome you with open arms. After all,we are all just sinners saved by grace. There is no one perfect except for Jesus. That is so sad to me that a church would actually not want to be a part of them. I am a born again christian, and that is not how anyone should be treated, regardless of your past. We all have a past. Keep looking, there are good churches out there. There is one for you, just don't give up. My church would be happy to have you worship with us! I have been a singe mom myself and we have a few in our church, so what? Please don't give up. You need to find a good fundamental, bible believing church. It will change your life!! God bless you and your children.

Kelly - posted on 02/11/2010

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I am appalled that a church would turn you away! I am so sorry to hear that. I don't know what kind of church that did that, but thats not the place for you and your kids. Bless you for trying to find a church to worship in and to teach your kids about God. Thats the best place for all of you. I don't know where you live, but look in the phone book and find a bible believing baptist church in your area. They should welcome you with open arms. After all,we are all just sinners saved by grace. There is no one perfect except for Jesus. That is so sad to me that a church would actually not want to be a part of them. I am a born again christian, and that is not how anyone should be treated, regardless of your past. We all have a past. Keep looking, there are good churches out there. There is one for you, just don't give up. My church would be happy to have you worship with us! I have been a singe mom myself and we have a few in our church, so what? Please don't give up. You need to find a good fundamental, bible believing church. It will change your life!! God bless you and your children.

Roxanne - posted on 02/11/2010

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Hi Kristina,

As a christian, I am very sorry for the treatment you have received in the church; it is obvious to me the places you have attended are not CHRIST centered, and living according to the word of God. The bible teaches judge not lest ye be judged. and it also teaches us that God is the only one who can condemn. Your past is your past and if you have asked God to forgive you, He has has and NO ONE has the right to bring your past back up. Where do you live? I am involved in a few areas where there are wonderful churches , maybe we can help you find a place where you will be accepted. I go to church in Taunton, MA. Hope to hear from you soon. Please continue to pray and ask God to direct your paths, You are doing an amazing thing by wanting to raise your children up in the admonition of God

Alana - posted on 02/10/2010

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Yes Do not give up! There are a lot of churches out there and people that understand we all have different backgrounds. And that is why Jesus came it was for the "sick" not the "health". We all have our "sicknesses" no matter if we were brought up in a christian family or one a opposite as we can imagine. You will find the right church and when you do it will be like the family you have always wanted. You are on the right track! And God will reward you and your children for that. Jesus Loves you and your children very much and has a plan for you that may not make fenceew at the moment but it is the perfect plan and we just have to trust him and follow. He will do all the rest.

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