Any reassuring advice out there? X

Gemma - posted on 02/06/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hi all,
Ok I have just only found out that I'm 5 weeks pregnant which is still so early on, I wasn't actually properly with the father and he isn't aware of this yet and that's because he was in a serious motorbike accident and is now paralysed from the neck down and may possibly be on a breathing machine for the rest of his life, he can't currently speak and I haven't met any of his family so the situation is all very fragile. He is still currently in intensive care. I'm just very scared and very confused as of what to do or how to go about any of this. I always pictured these events happening with a loving partner and it all being very exciting but obviously it's the total opposite to that too.
I'm a young woman and I would love to have the support of a partner right now so I am also so worried that I won't find anyone again.
I only found out a couple of days ago so please forgive me if I haven't explained very well

Gemma X

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Raye - posted on 02/10/2016

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If you're planning on keeping the baby, you need to tell the father's family right away. Hopefully they will be supportive of you. Your child is their son's only future. He won't get to go out and have any more adventures... but your baby will. This should not be a burden on the child... to live it's life because it's father can't. But it should be a lesson that not every day is guaranteed, and to make the most of what you have.

Becoming a single mom is scary. But you can do it. And down the road sometime you will probably find the perfect partner for you. Until then you need to focus on taking care of you and that baby. Your child may be eligible for disability benefits from the father's side (or if he dies, then death benefits, social security, etc.). Don't bring this up to the family right away, as that may make you seem to be money-hungry. But do your research on what options and financial support you will be able to receive. You may need to consult with a lawyer that is familiar with this type of situation.

Do you have any family that you can lean on for help?

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Gemma - posted on 02/11/2016

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Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me, it's all been a very confusing week.
One minute I think 'I can do this' and the next I panic about not being ready.. It wasn't long before I found out that I registered for college again and everything. I still currently live at home with two noisy dogs and my mum and my brother who struggle to get up for their alarms so it's all very manic here sometimes which panics me as I would struggle to have a baby trying to sleep here.

I need to get my head straight, I would definitely tell the fathers family, I'm just hoping they would be supportive.

Your right, I won't bring that side up to the family but I will do a bit of research as that might help me stop worrying aswell.

My family is supportive and my mum does keep telling me ahe will support me with whatever I choose, it's just such a big life changing decision so it's hard to decide alone without the support of a partner. It's hard not having someone to be excited with me that's for sure.

Thank you again, I have a lot to think about xx

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