i live with my fiance and his parents.

Aimee - posted on 09/13/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )

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and i need help!! i can't get my fiance to understand that this baby will be here before we know it. i'm 24 weeks pregnant and he acts like we've got all the time in the world. he also keeps saying the 'well we can just wait until the baby gets here to move out' ...NO! if we do that then we will never get out of here! right?? or am i just over reacting? his mom is over bearing i just can't take her. and i know i'm crazy and pregnant right now but seriously.. i can't take it much longer. i know we don't have a whole lot of money but i'm getting so much help with medicaid and everything else that with his income alone we could afford a decent apartment and have everything and more for our baby. someone please help me?

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Claudia - posted on 09/18/2011

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You are not crazy, if she is overbearing, she will take over your child and not allow you to be the mom.... I had a overbearing mother in law, and she was so much in our business that today she is my ex-mother in law.... move far away from her.... but remember, you will need your family to help you. I have 2 boys with my 2nd husband and it is the most exausting job I ever had. It is 24/7, day and night... You dont have time for yourself not even to go to the bathroom.... So if you will need her help, try to do things in a nice way. After all she is your baby's grandma.

Aimee - posted on 09/14/2011

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thank you, his mom is our main problem. she doesn't cut his food or anything like that, but she does cook and sometimes if he's left a drink can or something in our room she will come in here and grab it while nobody is here and i HATE when people do that!! my mother never ever went into my room while i lived with her so why does this woman. and i know that it's just little things that she does that make him feel comfortable but really get to me i guess, but i guess i'll just keep pressing into his brain that i do not want to live here at all. i want to start our family in our own place without his mother breathing down my neck..

Jane - posted on 09/13/2011

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Have you tried laying out the budget in writing so he can see that you two really can afford to move out? Also, is he getting treatment from his mom that he would be afraid he would have to give up if he was with just you? I had a friend whose mother-in-law cut her husband's and son's food for them, among other things. And finally, is there a way that you can explain to him that as a new mom you want to nest and that means in your own place? With him?

Kattia - posted on 09/13/2011

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It's definitely a lot harder to move with a newborn, but not impossible. Have you ask him why he doesn't want to move yet? You may feel like you can handle to move financially, but maybe he's concern about it. New baby + new house payments can scare just about anybody. If not that then maybe it's the way his mom treats him. How
Is she handling having her "baby" under her roof?

If there is no financial or mommy issues, then you need to make him understand that you are not comfortable living there.

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