what to do about a dead beat dad?

Torie - posted on 08/20/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I am 28 weeks pregnant. and the father of my child and i have been together 4 years prior to becoming pregnant. When we found out he was there for me he even proposed. But 4 months later he left and said that he never loved me and was only around for the baby. then after a month of being apart he came back and asked for another chance but now after prettty much an exact month of being back together he decided that he once aagin didn't wanna be with me but this time he didnt say it he just distanced himself and would say it was gonna be okay and he loved me and then I found out that he had been seeing someone else and just telling me what i wanted to hear and having sex with me. After confronting him about it he said very hatefully that he didnt care about me but he cares about her. and now he wont admit to having sex or anything while he was talking to her. She also has a daughter of her own and he is there for her all the time. They have only been together a week but he tells me he doesnt think that the child im pregnant with is his now and refuses to talk to me about anything he is just hateful and calls me names. I'm not sure what to do I cant eat or sleep or stop thinking about it. Has anyone else gone through this? Should I have hope that he will come around or just give up?

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Camille - posted on 08/22/2012

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You've already answered your own question. He treats you like shit but you still want to be with him. He's sleeping with someone else, possibly endangering your health by doing so....and you still want to be with him. It sounds like he's leading you on so he can get want he wants then runs back to another woman. My opinion: if he wanted to marry you he would have. He knows you will wait around for him so he can run back to you anytime he has problems with the other woman. He probably figures that your trapped because your carrying his child. Grow a backbone and move on. Would you really want your child to witness how their father treats their mother, and thinks it's ok to do so? There are strong single mothers in this world...be strong! Take has ass for child support and move on. Once he sees that you can live your life without him he might try to come back in your life.....don't do it, he made his choice with the other woman. At this point your the backup plan. Remember that and stay strong. If he wants to come over just for sex...don't endanger your unborn child...your the backup plan. Have I been down this path, yes! But I was the one that had my ex as the backup plan, because I knew he loved me and wasnt going anywhere when I dated someone else, but there were no children involved. You have a child to think about.

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