Who did you have in the room with you during labor?

Tiphanie - posted on 02/22/2010 ( 72 moms have responded )

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Who did you have helping you? Do you regret any of them and is it better if the dad waits until after you have giving birth?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Emily - posted on 06/20/2011

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I was going with just my husband, but my mom is so excited that I just can't say no! So I now have a strict rule, my husband and my mom only.

If you are having trouble with telling someone that you don't want them to be in the room for the delivery, ask your nurse before hand to restrict the number of support people you are allowed to have in your room (say to a max of 2 people). That way, you can say "it's not my call, it's the hospital's decision" and you won't hurt anyone's feelings. Most nurses are happy to go along with it in order to help you out!

Samantha - posted on 08/14/2010

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yeah depends on the person.i had my mum my husband,my sister and mother in law + midwife.i hate to think about having my mother in law there but when i was acuatly in labour i didnt give a shit who was there.it was nice to have al the support with every1 rubbing ya back getting u water etc it was very comforting

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User - posted on 02/19/2012

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Started off my mom and husband. Then my sister and husband. My mom was not fun in the delivery room at all. She got there a little late, so my husband was in there with me and my feet were up and I was being checked. My mom sticks her head down and when the nurse leaves she starts harrassing me. My husband kindly kicked her out and invited in my sister. She was good and my husband was wonderful.

Stefany - posted on 02/15/2012

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u def want the dad there.. its a magical time that should be shared by both of u

Marie - posted on 02/15/2012

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i just had my 7th baby and only had my mom with me my partner had to miss hes daughters birth because our 1yr old son was not well so he stayed at mom with him

Barb - posted on 02/13/2012

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My mom the first. This time I will have my amazing husband with me even though he seems very freaked about it. I would love to have my mom too, but she is coming up to my 2 year old daughter.

Krista - posted on 02/12/2012

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I was in overnight so I had my boyfriend as well as his brother and his girlfriend stay overnight with me. It worked out really well because my boyfriend actually fell asleep so it was really nice to have someone else there to talk to through all the waiting and to hold my hand through contractions. They all stayed with me until the doctor came in and said it was time (which was about 10 minutes before my daughter was actually born), and then it was only my boyfreind in the room with me while I was giving birth. It all worked out perfectly as the rest of our families actually arrived at the hospital about 5 minutes after she was born so there was no one else there to have to force out of the room (because I only wanted it to be my boyfriend there).

Sarah - posted on 02/12/2012

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My husband was the only one with me. My mom tried to come in but I sent her out. I will be doing the same with this baby when she is ready to come out.

Sarah - posted on 01/23/2012

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I ended up needing a c-section so I one again had only my husband in the room with me.. I wouldn't ask for a better man.

Nicole - posted on 01/23/2012

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My 1st delivery I had my hubby, my mom, and my best friend who was already a mom. I felt I needed my best friend bc she had done it recently. I needed her support and she had been there for me like no one had been, besides my husband! Of course I had my mom, she's my mom, come in we all need our mommy when having a baby! My hubby was there to cut the cord and stand w his back to the action! Lol! It's was an amazing experience! My 2nd it was just me and my hubs. My mom hadn't made it in time, and my best friend was having complications w her pregnancy but it was still very special. I do have to say both my brothers were in the waiting room, ok actually they were outside the door yelling is the baby here yet! Which I found amusing! They were there for both my deliveries. This time my 3rd it will probably be my hubby my mom and 1 brother which makes me sad. I don't think I could have a bunch of people looking at my vagina stretched out beyond belief! But to each is own!

Dusty - posted on 01/10/2012

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With my 1st, only my mom was in the room (not my biological mom, it's a bad relationship there). His father lived in a different state at the time, & his flight was delayed, which is the only reason he wasn't in the room. With my 2nd, my mom & my husband were in the room. My husband & I weren't married at the time, & were going through some rough patches, which is why I chose to have my mother there also. With this one, it will only be my husband in the room.

Maggie - posted on 07/05/2011

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I had my sister in law and my best friend- they were amazing, my best friend is in med school so I felt especially pleased that she was there to share that special moment with me!

Nikki - posted on 07/04/2011

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With my first child, my mom was in the room with me. But that was only because my husband was deployed overseas. With my 2nd, it was just my husband and it was so much less stressful for me. With the one I'm pregnant with now, and any future children, it will be my husband and no one else. He is my best friend and he's the only person that I feel is the best comfort for me, there is no one else that I would want with me. Good luck!

Elizabeth - posted on 07/04/2011

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when i had my son the plan was for my mum,husband and sister to be with me, but everything happened really fast. I was 1 week early and had a 4 hour labour and only 1 hour of it was i in hospital. my dad drove us in, so mum, dad and husband were with me from the start, my sister almost didn't make it and my in-laws come to visit think i was still in early labour and got stuck as i was on the floor at the end of the bed, infront of the door. so in the end it was both my parents, both my in-laws, my sister, my husband and my midwife. 7 people and me. the only people at the business end was my husband to catch and the midwife but I was naked and uncovered as I over heated.the only time i felt weird was the few second when the in-laws arrived, i then had contraction/push and didn't care anymore and after my son was born and i needed to move to the bed.

what you want/plan might not be what happens it all depends on the labour and where the people are when you go into labour.

hopefully with this pregnancy/ birth it will be just my mum, sister and husband, my in-law will hopefully be caring for my son.

Elizabeth - posted on 07/04/2011

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when i had my son the plan was for my mum,husband and sister to be with me, but everything happened really fast. I was 1 week early and had a 4 hour labour and only 1 hour of it was i in hospital. my dad drove us in, so mum, dad and husband were with me from the start, my sister almost didn't make it and my in-laws come to visit think i was still in early labour and got stuck as i was on the floor at the end of the bed, infront of the door. so in the end it was both my parents, both my in-laws, my sister, my husband and my midwife. 7 people and me. the only people at the business end was my husband to catch and the midwife but I was naked and uncovered as I over heated.the only time i felt weird was the few second when the in-laws arrived, i then had contraction/push and didn't care anymore and after my son was born and i needed to move to the bed.

what you want/plan might not be what happens it all depends on the labour and where the people are when you go into labour.

hopefully with this pregnancy/ birth it will be just my mum, sister and husband, my in-law will hopefully be caring for my son.

Stephanie - posted on 07/01/2011

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I had my husband, his sister (she took pictures), My husbands Ex (she didnt believe that the baby was his and didn't leave when the drs said I could push, regret her being in the room), 2 student nurses, my OB, and the attending nurses! I had a pretty full room! lol! I wouldn't want to deliver without my husbands support! He was such a great coach! I just hope he can be there this time! lol

Stephanie - posted on 07/01/2011

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I had my husband, his sister (she took pictures), My husbands Ex (she didnt believe that the baby was his and didn't leave when the drs said I could push, regret her being in the room), 2 student nurses, my OB, and the attending nurses! I had a pretty full room! lol! I wouldn't want to deliver without my husbands support! He was such a great coach! I just hope he can be there this time! lol

Jodie - posted on 06/28/2011

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With my first i had everyone lol, I hadmy very amazingly supportive hubby (couldnt have done it without him) My mum and my best friend. Glad to be surrounded by supportive people who loved me and had own ways to support me!

Amelia - posted on 06/19/2011

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I had my husband, his aunt(who was going to be a the godmother) and my mom "forced" her way into the room. I kept asking her to leave and she wouldn't.
When my son was about 6 months old, we had a huge blowout in that side of the family and I still do not speak to his Aunt to this day. I was glad my husband was there(of course!) but I thought it was rude of my mom. She was in the way and even the nurses were getting annoyed.

This time I will definetly have my husband in the room and my best friend, who has agreed to take guardianship of the kids if something was to EVER happen to us, god forbid.

I think if the dad is involved and wants to be there, he should be!

Rebekah - posted on 06/18/2011

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Both times I had my husband, my mom, and my dad. I loved having them there and hope that all three will be present at my third child's birth in October.



ETA: Still undecided if my 4 year old will be there for his baby brother's birth (in October) or not.

Alei - posted on 06/17/2011

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i was 20 when i had my daughter i knew from the moment i got pregnant that i wanted my mom there with me she was my biggest support when i was pregnant and then on the other hand i also had my daughters father in the room because i felt obligated too because he was her father but honestly i really regret that me and him werent together and it made me feel uncomfortable afterwards so to any woman make sure you are comfortable with anyone you have in there i promise dont regret it later

Rebecca - posted on 08/28/2010

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For both my kids I had my husband and my mother in with me and I would not change a thing. They were absolutely fantastic. My mum has done it 4 times and been there for 4 others so I knew she would be great but I wasn't sure about my husband coz he isn't good with needles and stuff like that and he said the whole way through my first pregnancy that he would be staying at my shoulders and he ended up seeing the whole lot and then cutting the cord and I know he would not have it any other way. With our second we both knew what we were in for so we were a little better prepared for it all. Because I didn't really want my mother in law there we got her to look after our son when we went to the hospital and that worked out really well. And then again I just had my mum and hubby with me. But after having an 18 hour labour the first time we were all a little bit shocked with the second being less than 3 hours, but it was great. My mum actually only just made it to the hospital in time.
Its totally up to what you feel comfortable with I thought it was going to be a bit strange with my mum there but it was great having someone there who has been through it all before, and she kept explaining stuff to my hubby which was really good too.

Sarah - posted on 08/25/2010

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I had my husband in the room when I had our daughter. My mother in law was suppose to be there since my mom has been passed for 10 years. But she missed it she was a hour away when I went into labor and didnt make it back in time. But since Im pregnant I am giving her the chance to be in there this time. I wouldnt know what to do if my husband wasnt there for support he was the best.

Maria - posted on 08/16/2010

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I had always planned to have my mom and my bf. My bf was there for the support and the cut the cord and what not and I wanted my mom so she could take pictures so my bf could focus on me and the baby. When I did have my son, it was my bf, my mom and my grandma who were in my room. The three of them were sitting in the room with my during my contractions to keep me compnay and at on point I freaked out about having to use the bathroom. The nurse came in and checked me I was at 8cm and they were gonna break my water(I had my son completely naturally no drugs or epidural) but as soon as she said that, the water it broke on its own and I went to 10cm and started pushing. It all happened so fast I didnt have time to kick any body out but the extra support was nice and my mom got plenty of pics :)

Amanda - posted on 08/15/2010

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i actually had a bunch of people in there, i had my mother and my grandmother holding my legs, my baby daddys mother , his sister, my best friend, and my aunt in the room while i gave birth. with my twins that are due in december, im only going to have my baby daddy in the room, he refused to be in the room unless it was only him and i said with my first child i needed my mother there too, its a scary thing to go though, and i needed a mothers support, but he will def. be the only person in the room this time around except for the doctors.

Stevie - posted on 08/15/2010

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I had my partner (bubs dad) my mum and my 15 yo brother my 17 yo brother was ment to be there to but when i told him i was being induced hethought it was another false alarm haha so he didnt come down with my mum n other brother

Rita_2_davey - posted on 08/14/2010

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I as my daughters' mom was in the delivery room for all 3 of her children. There father was there as well. My husband was there for the last 2 that were born. She realized that this was such an important event in our lives as well as hers and her hubby. It was me with the last one that helped and coached the most, and I have to honestly say that it brought me so much closer to that little girl. To see her prior to her cleaning, holding her, it just brought tears to my eyes.
As for the dad being there, my daughter didn't mind at all, however if you have a hubby that is a little queezy, its best that he wait until its over, just in case of complications. If he worries, then that in itself makes you more concerned. This is something that has to be yours and hubbys' choice. Nobody can tell you either way. All I can say is birth is so beautiful, loving. This is your decision Mom and Dad. Congratulations and I wish you both a very healthy baby boy/girl!!

Tabatha - posted on 02/27/2010

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i dont know where u live but here in canada u can only have 2 people my first baby i had my mom and the daddy of the baby everyone eles waited in the other room until my son was bron he now is 13 so really its up to u i hope all goes well for u and the new baby

Samantha - posted on 02/26/2010

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well.. i had my mother and the father of the baby in the room with me. I dont regret it because they were both a HUGE help and they both could make me very relaxed. ( well as relaxed as you can get in labor ) lol. I think it all depends on what you would feel more comfortable with. You could always start out with him in the room and tell him to leave if it gets too much or your not comfortable :)

Nicole - posted on 02/26/2010

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I had my now husband in the room for both of our kids (even though we were not married at the time). The first baby he was scared, so we brought in some extra help to pick him up off the floor if necessary. My grandmother wanted to be there because it was her first great-grandchild and we happily obliged, my mother and step (yes step) father were in the room too. If it weren't for him I would have definately wound up going C, as he knew which cards to play to help me push and help with the delivery. I had some issues with my first labor and deliveries. With my second I had my husband and my step father only, mom and baby #1 missed the delivery by mere minutes, which was disappointing to say the least. Now that we are having number three we are planning to ask that my father in law be there as well as my mother, and have made arrangements with a nearby friend to watch the older two. They're just too young to understand the whole process and I am afraid it will scare them. As for dad waiting until after it really depends on your comfort, if you want him there have him there. I was unsure myself because we were still at an ackward place in our relationship but it really strengthened his relationship with our daughter. It also strengthened our relationship as well because he saw me at my very very very worst and knew he could handle a lifetime of me after that. Believe me when I say I was pretty awful in that delivery room.

Rosalie - posted on 02/26/2010

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personally all I'm having is my mom and the baby's father, his mom wanted to be in the room but personally i think that's a moment she should just wait outside for lol, i honestly don't even feel comfortable with my baby's father in there but it's his baby too, but i sure hope i don't regret it & make sure when your decided go with who YOU want not who your going to make happy because after all this is all you hun!

Jennifer - posted on 02/26/2010

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I had my mom and little sister stay for most of my labor. My mom rubbed my back and my little sister [16] fed me Jello and ice chips, while my boyfriend talked to me and held my hand during contractions. When I started feeling like I needed to push my mom and sister went outside the room to wait so my boyfriend and I could experience the miracle of birth together. It worked out beautifully!! =]

Karyn - posted on 02/25/2010

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for my first child i asked my mum to come in with me at first she said no but by the time came she had changed mind and said she would stay and support me until bubs ready to be born by that time she stayed and even witnesses born which she said she was privileged to witness i didn't care either way it helped that i was supported at all times

Latoya - posted on 02/25/2010

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i had my baby's father, my mom&my lil sis with my last 2 deliveries and most likely with this one also.......

Wendy - posted on 02/25/2010

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With our first, it was just my hubby in the room because we were induced a couple of weeks ahead of time so my mom wasn't able to get there in time (we lived in Alberta and my parents in BC at the time). We also only went to the hospital for a stress test late in the evening, so hubbys stepmom and dad were already getting ready to turn in for the night - when the doctors decided instead of a stress test they just wanted to induce right then and there and they didn't expect anyhting to happen for 12hours at least, if not 48hours. Well, a few hours later after hubby had to leave due to visitor hours, I was in full labor and had to call him back to the hospital at 2am. We didn't want to wake any of his family since they all had to work later that morning, so it was just us =)

We are due with our second baby this May, and I figure it will be just hubby again. Maybe my mom (we live in BC now). Maybe his Mom, depending on how comfortable I am with it when it happens. His mom and I are touch and go.

Danielle - posted on 02/24/2010

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first part was baby's daddy and my neighbor because she's a surgeon...then my mom got there and my neighbor left....i would have preferred that my baby's dad wasn't in there but that's because we were on really bad terms (and havent been together since i was about 7months pregnant)......this time it will be my soon to be husband and no one else unless of course my sitter for my son can't get there lol

Melanie - posted on 02/24/2010

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when i had my son, i had my mom, my sister, my 2 best friends and the babys father, and wouldnt of wanted it any other way! this time around i am expecting identical twin girls and dont think i'll be able to have everyone in there, but would if i could!

Jennifer - posted on 02/24/2010

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With my first child I let everyone that wanted to be in in, my fiance, mother, sister and my dad and stepmom lol a lot of people I know :)) I am pregnant with my second and I think this time there will be less people, maybe my mom and sister plus my other sister and of course my fiance, if anybody at all him. . .well I would say my baby daddy, I wanted him there the most, but I love him and we have a really good relationship, so you have to base it on what you want and what you need to be happy :)) Hope this helps you :))

Michelle - posted on 02/24/2010

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I am preggo with my 3rd....my mom and husband was in the room with my first...then just my husband with my 2nd and it will be the same with this one.....I just didnt feel comfortable with anyone else in the room besides my husband....but everyone is different....good luck to you

Amy - posted on 02/24/2010

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I had my husband in the room with me and I don't think I could have done it with out him there! He was the only one we had in the room because the rest of the family didn't really care. It was a long hard labor for me, and in the end they needed to use a vaccume and since it's not done very often the ENTIRE wing was in my room. They were Large Rooms, and I couldn't believe how full it was! I didn't care, I just wanted my baby out. It was weird having so many people there when they got my son out, however It was such a wonderful experience I didn't even notice them there when my son was finally out and in my arms.

Chelsea - posted on 02/24/2010

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Just me and my hubby. No doctors, midwives or the like. For some reason during early labour, I felt that my husband should go back to bed and I got in and out of the bathtub a million times. So I laboured alone (well the dogs followed me to the bathroom a couple times) and woke my husband when I hit transition (and locked the dogs in the bedroom when I started pushing).

It was pretty nice being the only ones that knew of the existence of our new daughter for a couple hours. :)

Kayla - posted on 02/24/2010

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This is my first, and the two I plan to have with me the whole time are my mom and my best friend. My mom is a wonderful person, and she's a bit more authoritative than I am, so she might be able to help if I really need someone to do something :p My best friend and I have known each other since elementary school, and I'll be attending her birth as well (she's due any day now, so it's gonna be a learning experience for me!). Unfortunately, the father isn't likely to develop any sudden interest in the baby, and I wouldn't want someone there who didn't actually WANT to be there.



There are some others (my sister, dad, brothers+wives, and a few friends) who I don't think I'd mind being there before/after the actual delivery, but I'm not sure I'd be comfortable with them there during the pushing. My dad (and possibly his wife) will be coming in from out of state, though, so I don't know if he'll make it in time to see me before delivery. My sister lives nearby, and we get along fine, but I think we've both agreed that we don't need the other there during such an "exposed" time :p

Sarah - posted on 02/24/2010

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This is my first and I'm having my husband, mom and sister. My mother-in-law would love to be in there too but I'm just not comfortable with that. I think it's great to have your partner in the room, if he can handle it. Other than that, don't do anything that you're not comfortable with, you may end up regretting it. If someone gets hurt or disappointed by not being included, there's not much you can do about that. You're not going to always be able to please everyone.

Keera - posted on 02/24/2010

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im 35 1/2 weeks. im planning on having my boyfriend w/ me and maybe one of my really close friends. i want as few people as possible in there as possible. 1) i dont want people other then the dr/nurses looking at my crotch and "someone" in the family wanted to video tape it [i told them "no" and that i dont want pix of me like that]...2) there has been drama between me&my boyfriend against our parents so to keep the drama away i dont want them in there.....to me i feel its a personal moment for the mother, father, & baby [and any other of there children]...

Randall - posted on 02/23/2010

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I only had my daughters dad, but my mom really wanted to be in the room. I didn't let her and now i feel really bad cause she cried.

Trish - posted on 02/23/2010

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my first labour I had my mother and the father of the baby... this was ok, but it kinda made me uncomfortable and made the labour go longer. Second time round was just me and the father and I was heaps more comfortable and actually went quicker. Ill be having just me and him again this time :) Hope this helps.

Dana - posted on 02/23/2010

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With my son I had my mom, my hubby, my mother in law, and my best friend and cousin switched in and out (we could on have 4 people in the room at the end). I loved having everyone there with me. I said "whoever wanted to see all that could be the room"...haha. With my next child it will probably be the same people.

Suzette - posted on 02/23/2010

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I plan on having my mom and my husband in the room. But then again, that's all that will be here since we're on a military base and that's where I'm delivering. :) If there was anyone else that's still who I'd want in the room with me. I think it's a personal decision though and it all depends on your hubby, bf, etc. and how you think they'll react or what they want to do in regards to being in the room.

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