What to do when your 5 year old says she loves mom more than dad?

Mireille - posted on 02/16/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )




Our daughter is turning 5 this weekend. She has been home with her dad for the first year of her life and is now in Kindergarten. I have just gone back to work after maternity leave for our second daughter. Our eldest has been fine with the whole experience. Since about 2 months though she has been leaning on me and bluntly telling my husband she doesn't want his help or hugs because she loves me more. This hurts him and ME!

We have tried explaining to her that you can love 2 people differently, but this doesn't mean you love one more. We have made her apologize, sit in time out, and spend more time with dad. She keeps coming to me for almost everything even when it is super obvious that I am busy and dad has his hands free.

Tonight she sat with me for movie night the whole time, except when I had to get up. Then she sits with dad and she bluntly told him: "I'm gonna sit here till mommy is back cause I want to be with her all the time". My husband was so hurt he cried.

Please help us!!!


View replies by

Anne - posted on 05/28/2012




I wouldn't worry about this for now :) I honestly don't think she knows what it means to love someone
"more" and if you react to her claiming she loves someone more, then she might be doing it for the attention - just an idea, no offence meant :D

Jennie - posted on 03/28/2012




This is happening with my daughter who is five, She has alwayys been with me and dad works and sees her in the afternoon and evening. Shes said some very hateful things to her dad and he walks away with tears in his eyes. I've been told this is just a phase. That by the time she is 8 she will be all about dad. This is what I hope.

Rebekah - posted on 03/19/2012




Yeah, I see absolutely no problem with this behavior at all and certainly would not punish her for loving her mom. My kids both say they love their daddy best.

Cynthia - posted on 02/17/2012




aww. how cute. you cant take this to heart. at 5 she has no idea about consideration of others. and there is plenty of time for daddy daughter to bond. i'm sure she loves her daddy and this will pass.

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