Internet Connections that we might not want to make!

Joan - posted on 08/22/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )




My daughter was adopted from my home state after her birth mother had over two years to reunite and then over three years of termination proceedings including appeals, wrongly designated fathers, erroneous birth certificates, etc. Now, six months after probate I find birth mom has a FB page and a page on MySpace designated to "her family/her children" complete with a picture that I sent to her after their final visit. These pages are open to the public of course. I have alerted the social workers and I know that there is not a lot I can do. I won't be sending any more pictures and luckily I am not obligated to that. I know that my daughter still talks about re-connecting with her birth mother when she is 18 but this opens up possibilities that chill me to the bone!

My intent here is to alert other Moms and for support in this matter. Opinions?


View replies by

Felicita - posted on 03/30/2010




I know how frustring this is. It happened to me. My child was also put on MySpace with a pic that I had given her out of courtisy and she used it for her MySpace. I was so upset. She has had her rights terminated by the courts. I don't care that she is the BM. I am this child's mother. So I e-mailed MySpace to tell them of this. And they took off all the pics of her. the bm has not posted anymore pics of her although she does talk about my baby and seeing her soon. She does'nt use her name though. I am not sure of facebook. MySpace said that they would do it this one time only but it worked because she has'nt posted any pics of her again.

[deleted account]

unfortunately, there's probably not a lot you can do, but monitor your daughters time on the internet. My child is not allowed unsupervised internet use, even in school, and she is only 8, because of her BM. You may want to occasionaly check these webpages to see if anything worrisome is posted about your child, such as the BM missing her and talking about finding her again. How old is your daughter, and how long has the adoption been final? If she is young enough, she may grow out of the re-connecting desire after she really settles in with you. Love her and support her, then help her when she turns 18 if she still chooses to re-connect.

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