Alcohol in your home... To drink or not to drink?

Sharon - posted on 06/26/2010 ( 19 moms have responded )




Thinking of when you grew up and in your home now, how do you treat alcohol?

Is it something to get wasted on?

Or is it more casual?

Do you choose your wine based on what meal your having tonight? Do the kids get watered down wine when they're older? Do the younger kids get grape juice in their wine goblets?

Growing up my dad drank beer & sometimes hard liqours. My mom wasn't wine educated and my dad wasn't interested in it. But we grew up multiculturally, not only in our home but via our friends homes. And my dad knew that in other homes wine was served with dinner. We were told to do as they do.

Especially our UK friends. Wine was served with dinner ALWAYS. At about 10 they got watered down wine. In the teens we got sips of real wine but were served goblets of watered down stuff, but less watered down than the 10 yr olds.

Alcohol was very casual and absolutely no big deal. If we wanted to try something we were allowed to. Ouzo, whiskey, tequila... for the most part I think it was entertainment for the adults to see us recoil in disgust.

But we never spent our time scheming to get alcohol. Drunks were stupid, got in trouble and generally were never seen again, well not socially. hhmm thinking back, stupid drunks weren't seen again. people who stayed pleasant and stayed out of the laws' way were always welcome.

You guys?


[deleted account]

My parents never drank. My dad's grandfather was an alcoholic, and his mother grew up without a father because of it.

My husband and I drink on occasion. We keep a bottle of wine in the house and enjoy it after our daughter is in bed every so often.

I believe in teaching responsible drinking in moderation. Just like with everything else in life....eating junk food, watching tv, etc. Our daughter will not likely see us drinking until she is old enough to be taught the lesson.

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Lyndsay - posted on 06/28/2010




Both of my parents have been alcoholics at one point (my dad still is), so alcohol was always around as I was growing up. When I was younger my dad and step-mom would enlist me to make their strawberry daquiris for them at the trailer park. I was allowed to have tastes if I wanted, but I've always found alcohol quite disgusting.

Now, I don't have alcohol in my home. I still don't like the taste, so when I drink I drink to get drunk and thats not something I want to do at home with my little guy. Sometimes I will buy a bottle of liquor and it will sit in my freezer for months until the opportunity arises where I can go out with friends.

Lucy - posted on 06/28/2010




My folks always had a pretty relaxed attitude to alcohol, much like most Europeans.

If we were at a family party my parents would both enjoy a few drinks like vodka and orange (it was the 80's!) and about twice a week, usually at the weekend, there would be a bottle of wine opened at dinner. My parents would have 1-2 glasses each, and from the age of about 7 or 8 we were allowed a sip or two, and then progressed on to having a very watered down glass of our own. by 16, we could usually have a proper glass of wine with dinner, especially if we were out at a restaurant.

I never saw my parents having a drink like a beer or whatever just to relax in front of the TV. It was very much something that went with evening meals or parties. A social thing, really.

When I look at myself and my siblings, we have all pretty much followed the same pattern as our folks. None of us has had any kind of drinking problem, and because it wasn't taboo or forbidden, we didn't have the urge to go and get wasted as teenagers. I intend to deal with alcohol in the same way when my kids hit the right age.

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My parents are both alcoholics. My Dad's family REALLY likes their drink! Mom's side is mostly drugs although after that dies it tends to turn to alcohol... My mom's sister was a HEAVY alcoholic, my mom's mom binge drank for a few yrs until it affected her health adversly, Mom drinks wine daily or cheap beer. Dad always has them single shots of whiskey to add to his cokes...most of my brothers have problems w/drinking. You would KNOW when dad had too much to drink, he gets angry, talks too much, repeats everything over and over and just drives you nuts! Mom hides it real well, gets emotional, etc.

My Dad's house was the party house and he would purchase alcohol for us whenever we gave him the $. I've been falling down drunk a handful of times, but not since having kids. I usually can carry a buzz real well, but don't like getting drunk. I rarely drink, especially since I'm still BFing. My husband feels he "has" to have a beer every day. Sometimes it can just be a 32oz budweiser, other times he'll finish a 6pk...If his friends are over he tends to drink more and gets drunk on occassion...which REALLY irks me! I hate his incessant need for has been a bone of contention w/us since we both have alcoholics in our family.

My son has tried a sip of alcohol, but nothing more...I'm not sure about how we'll be w/him & drinking when he's older. Probably a "on special occassion" kinda thing. We do not drink wine and neither of us like champagne. If we're at an event, especially on my dad's side of the fam..., I wouldn't have a problem w/my kids pretending to drink wine or champagne in a wine glass or champagne flute. New Years we get my husband Henry's and we get our son Henry's Root beer. He calls it Derrick's beer. I think its cute, but def. see poss. issues w/it. Having had training in addiction counseling I would tell addicts to drink bottled soda or whatever in glasses so they feel "included" in their events.

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There was always alcohol in my parents house - they had a cupboard full of it although they rarely drank. We were always allowed a drink on special occasions (I was always partial to a sip of Brandy and Coke - mmm yummy) but was always supervised. I think this is part of the reason I have such a healthy attitude to alcohol - I have only been falling over drunk twice, when I was 16 I got drunk on my final day of school (it was a school tradition go down the woods and get drunk the school turned a blind eye) and on my hen do (I had Aftershock shots as part of my get a free drink from the barman dare). I hate being this out of control which is why it has only happened twice.

My hubby and I both drink regularly - he likes a beer or two every now and then and I like a nice glass of wine socially - I tend not to drink at home unless my friends are here - but we generally do not have more than one or two. I think maybe there is a difference between how the UK and US see drinking - I think in the UK we have a more relaxed opinion of alcohol.

Becky - posted on 06/26/2010




There was no alcohol at all in our home growing up. My dad was a pastor and my parents were missionaries, and at the time, the church had very strict rules about drinking, so they would've gotten fired. It was also against the rules at the boarding school we went to, although that certainly didn't stop a lot of people. (but did get some expelled!)
I never even tried alcohol until I was, I think, 19 or 20. (legal age in Alberta is 18.) Oh no, wait, I tried wine in Europe when I was 17. It was all I could do not to spit it across the table! I'm not crazy about wine and I hate beer, so when I drink, it's the hard stuff, and usually really sugary drinks like paralyzers and bellinis. As a result, I get sick before I get drunk. I really don't like the feeling of being drunk - that hazy, lightheaded feeling. So, I'm really not a big drinker.
My husband does like to drink. He used to drink too much (way back before we met). Now, he'll have a beer after work or out on the deck - not on a daily basis - and will drink more if he's with his brothers or out with friends. To be honest, although I have no problem with the 1 beer after work, I really don't like when he drinks more than that. I suppose it's just because I wasn't raised around people who drank at all. It bothers me that my 2 year old knows what beer is and pretends that he's going to the store to get beer. He's never had it though!!!
We (or I anyways) have the rule in our home that the kids will always have 1 sober caregiver. So if dh is drinking, I'm not. We also are very strict about not driving under the influence, so same thing if we're out.
Neither of us like wine, so we don't drink it with dinner, so no, our kids will never have watered down wine with a meal. Grape juice in wine goblets, probably not. Only if it was a special occassion like a wedding, where everyone was drinking wine or champagne. My preference is that our kids never have alcohol until they are legal age, but I realize that's not realistic. As to how I'll handle it, I don't know. I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. I have a feeling it's going to be a source of disagreement between dh and I, because he has much more liberal views about it than I do.

Tanya - posted on 06/26/2010




Alcohol was very taboo growing up. My parents didn't drink and until I got older I never saw any of my aunts or uncles drink either.

So when I got old enough to drink I went wild. I had an incredibly high tolerance because I have two out of four grandparents that come from alcoholics. One of my ggfathers drank himself to death and the other killed him self drunk. My dad was a big drinker until he married my mom. So I had to find out the hard way that it is not a good idea to drink a bottle and a half of Vodka . I am pretty sure that I ended up with mild alcohol poisoning twice.

I will tell my son about alcohol and if we have it around when he is a teen i will let him try it. i will not let him get drunk at home. I will also tell him that if he does end up drinking at a party he had better call me and not drive home.

C. - posted on 06/26/2010




We never had alcohol in our home growing up. We've had a couple, and I do mean a couple, drunks in the family and my parents were very strict on keeping it out of the house so it wouldn't be in our reach at all. They never drank. My mom drank casually as a college student and almost NEVER drinks since then, but she never got wasted or anything, and my dad never drank. It just wasn't something that they got into and they raised us that it's not important. Do I drink? On occasion. When my husband is home we keep some Heineken in the house and occasionally Ciroc. I would prefer that if we continue to keep it in the house, that we instill in our children how alcohol should be used and that if they ever steal ours, they're dead meat :)

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My dad's dad was an alcoholic and my dad was the one to find his father dead on the living room recliner with an exploded liver, so alcohol has never been a daily thing in my life, but my parents did teach me how to RESPECT alcohol. They showed me that drinking is okay for adults, but you need to know and understand your limit and always stick to it.

My best friend in the whole world has two parents who went through (and met in) the Culinary Institue of America (the OTHER CIA - lol) and they ALWAYS served a glass of wine with dinner. We would get a glass starting when we were 13 years old. My parents were okay with it (especially since I rarely ever rank more than a sip or two) and I got the same message of RESPECT for alcohol over there in the fact that NO ONE got over 1 glass with dinner and if the paretns wated more they always waited until after we were all home or in bed (if it was a sleepover).

Saying that, I don't drink. I just have no interest in it. There are a couple bottles of wine in my cupboard, but when we get it out I usually opt for water or juice. I have had alcohol maybe 3 times in the last 4 years and I am perfectly content with that. I will teach my kids what I was taught in regards to respecting alcohol.

Charlie - posted on 06/26/2010




Dad always had beers in the fridge for when he finished work , he would have one or two , mum never drank at all , when times got rough dad did turn to alcohol as a crutch for a while .

I was never allowed to have alcohol at home , as i got older i drank a lot on the party circuit , it wasnt unusual for my friends and i to hit a three day music festival and drink the entire three days .
Now that we have a child i only ever really have a glass or two of red with dinner , Jamie enjoys a cold beer after work , once a month when we go out with friends ( and Cooper is at grandmas for the night ) we will have a few drinks with mates over a BBQ , dinner party or for a catch up at the pub , once every couple of months i kick Jamie out of the house to have a boys night out with his mates , he usually has quiet a few beers with them , i get up in the morning and take care of cooper and cook him a big greasy breaky in bed , it works out great because ever two or three months is our girls night out and he does the same for me , night out , sleep in , greasy breakfast !!

We never get drunk around Cooper but we do have one or two glasses ( not for me at the moment im preggers ) with dinner , its not a big deal for us we drink responsibly around Cooper and never so much that we would be over the limit around him either .

A great glass of red wine is definitely a perk of being an adult !

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There was never alcohol in my house growing up (my parents don't drink) and I never wanted it in my house either (I don't drink). My ex did and that was one of our issues.

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I'm not sure how old most of you Mums are but i am 24 in july so still a young one and probably suprisingly I don't drink very much at all. I have been drunk tot he point of not remembering anything 2 times. 1st was when i was 16 second i was 17. I hate the feeling of being hungover and having 2 young kids to chase after in that state does not appeal to me in the slightest. Last time i got even a little tipsy was my 21st.

Growing up my mother used to use drugs but as i got older she stopped and started to drink quite heavily. My fatehr on the other hand i think since i can remember, so probably from the time i was 10, i have seen him drink maybe 20 beers. Funny enough most of those have been with my husband.

My husband loves to drink and it is a constant battle in our house. I understand that he likes to unwind with a drink and most of the time i don't care but a while for last yr every little event we had coming up he would make sure he had at least a 6 pack for. Its hard because most of his family are alcoholic gamblers and i am kind of scared of him becoming like that if he was to drink as much as he wants. my 2 biggest pet peevs.

My children come 1st and if i drink i feel that i am not as capable of looking after them unless i am completley sober. I also will not get behind the wheel if i have even had 1 drink.

I have a couple of friends who every weekend get their children babysat just so they can go out and get drunk. It drives me insane why have children if thats where you are at in your life? why not wait until you are ready to be fully responsible? Don't get me wrong getting a babysitter every now and then is not a problem.

I guess being pregnant or BF since i was 19 has helped me not drink!

Elisabeth - posted on 06/26/2010




Just I side note, a bit of a vent. I have never taken alcohol into my parents home out of respect I know they don't like it. My older sister still lives with my mum who is seperated from dad (and quite ill), she totally disrespects mum and her house. I went for a visit and my sister had cans and bottles of alcohol all over the kitchen counter. I was so angry that I just wanted to pore them all out, but instead took them all to her bedroom and left a note saying mum does't want that in the house, if you want to drink go to a friends or down the local. It really pissed me off, sorry but just needed to vent.

Elisabeth - posted on 06/26/2010




When I grew up my family never drank alcohol, I have never seen any of them drink. Now my husband will occassionally have a beer when he gets home from work to unwind, I can't even remember the last time I got wasted or even had a drink. I have a few bottles of wine that have been in my fridge for ages waiting to be drunk, I really enjoy my wine but hardley ever get the chance to drink it! I once had a very big problem with drinking before I had my children, I would drink it like water (I was a nightclub manager), in fact it was the only liquid I drank besides one glass of water and one glass of OJ in the morning. I didn't get wasted on it though only because I had such a high tolerance for it. When my children are older I don't know what I will do when it comes to them drinking, I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Joanna - posted on 06/26/2010




My parents drank when they were younger, If we had a sitter and they went out. But it was never in the house. Even now, the only time my parents drink might be a beer after a hard day of yardwork.

I never got alcohol growing up, while my friends parents might let them have some of their Zima (remember that?), alcohol was just never an option. PRobably why I drank so much as a teenager! I got all my drinking done (and 3 rounds of alcohol poisoning) from the ages of 16-21, and then I didn't really do it so much, except for the very rare social party. There might have been two or three times since then that I've been drunk. I do occasionally drink wine, and if I go out with a girlfriend we'll go to a pub for a Blue Moon, and I will never turn down champagne (I adore champagne brunches more than you'd ever know). It's one thing about being pregnant, I always crave beer and wine more.

My husband is a drinker though, he always has been. He had gotten 2 DUI's right before I met him so our first year together was spent with him going through a DUI court program (he lost his liscense so I had to drive him to court, probation, group meetings, AA's, etc). I wish he wouldn't drink at all, but he does drink every time he goes out, and he likes to have beer at home if it's hot or he's been working in his garage.

I only let one person in the house drink at a time, so if my husband has a few beers, I would skip wine. Or if I wanted a glass of wine or two at night, he wouldn't drink. I don't like the idea of both of us being under the influence (even a small influence) while caring for our daughter.

Rosie - posted on 06/26/2010




alcohol wasn't a big thing in my house growing up. there were occasions like christmas where my dad and grandma would make Tom and Jerry's, and i would get a sip. and whenever we went to my grandmas house we would play poker, my gma would always have a 7&7, or whiskey and water. she only had one or 2, but it was like a poker tradition or something.

at my house we don't entertain much so we don't have too much alcohol in the house. chad likes to have a beer every now and then, but it ususally takes him weeks to finish a 12 pack. i like ice cream and alcohol, lol!! pink squirrels, and grasshoppers, mmmm. but those are only made very rarely. i like pina coladas as well. those i'll get on alittle kick with and drink for like 4 days straight, but i only have 1 (albeit big) glass of that.

however when i was 19, i had my first experience with alcohol (other than the sip of tom and jery's). i went a bit crazy with it, and drank till i puked every time i drank which was probably twice a week. i don't really attribute that to my upbringing, i think it had more to do with my ex fiance. he wouldn't "allow" me to try drinking or smoking, and so one night i got drunk, smoked like a chimney and cheated on him to get him out of my life. it was a very trying time in my life, i learned alot from it though. :)

Caitlin - posted on 06/26/2010




When I was growing up, we weren't allowed to touch alcohol at my moms house, but she was an alcoholic (not in recovery at the time) she drank WAY too much wine (to this day I still can't drink wine..) At my dads he always had a beer open, but he never got drunk, just liked to relax in the summer. When we got older we were allowed to have a drink if we wanted, but I never wanted wine, when there was liquer served, I always partook. I like booze, but now I don't drink.. Can't stand most alcohol (I went WAY overboard as a teenager) so our bar is full. My husband does drink, but not alone, so the bar will remain full for a long time.

[deleted account]

Tons of alcohol (beer, hard alcohol and wine) in my parents home growing up.....they often entertained which is when my mom would drink socially and my dad would have a glass of wine or a cold beer almost every night with dinner. EXTREMELY casual, bordering on alcoholism for my dad! My parents have a wine cellar in their basement and my dad makes his own wine from scratch.

In our home now, we don't TYPICALLY keep alcohol.....Chad is a recovering addict and although he's never had a problem with alcohol we don't care to have it in our home. I don't drink! Blah.....I drank myself stupid as a teenager and really have no desire as an adult! IF I was to have a drink it definitely WOULD NOT be wine.....gross! Most beer is disgusting as well.....VODKA! That's about all I'll drink.

My thoughts are all scattered right now.....I'll be back later...

Johnny - posted on 06/26/2010




My family treated alcohol very much like yours did Sharon. It was never a big deal, we casually enjoyed it, and I never really focused on drinking while I was young. I didn't think it was "cool" or "rebellious". In fact, I was given a case of beer for my 16th birthday, when I went away for college, my mom found the entire thing, still full, under my bed.

My father quit drinking when I was 7 years old because he found that he was getting to the point where 1 or 2 was becoming 3 or 4 and he didn't like that. I didn't really find that out until I was much older, when I was a kid, he just said it was "for his health" and I believed that. My mother often had a glass of wine with dinner, but that's it. They also enjoyed going on wine tours, and my dad would sample but spit. When I was 19, they actually took me on a wine tour. It was fun. For family parties us kids would usually be allowed a watered down glass of wine with dinner. And once I was an older teen, we would be included if there was champagne to toast a special occasion. I only ever remember seeing one family member drunk on one occasion ever. My grandmother had too much at a Greek restaurant one night and had to be helped to the bathroom. I think we all just found it amusing.

When I graduated with my undergrad degree, my father announced that he was going to take up drinking again, for his health, lol. He isn't a big drinker but he enjoys wine with dinner and him & my husband share a passion for good Scotch. He just returned from a trip to Scotland and bought back 7 bottles. It will probably take him at least 5 years to get through them.

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