Are you desperate? Or is it that you think I'm that desperate?

[deleted account] ( 42 moms have responded )

So, I went to Starbuck's for my morning Grande Caramel Macchiato in Venti cup with extra whip cream and extra caramel. It was early morning, I hadn't had my coffee yet (I was working on that) and hadn't showered yet. My hair was tied to the top of my head, no make up on, wearing gray sweats that Ive had for 15 years and a hoodie. Not my most glam moment to say the least. On the drive there the radio station was playing 80's music which was awesome bc I love 80's music. I listened happily and sang along all the while my kids whined "Mommy we want to listen to the Little People cd!!!". I turned up the 80's music a notch louder and ignored them. After all, it was a short trip. I get my coffee and just as I'm pulling out my 3 year old son chokes on his smoothie which triggers him to puke. Just wonderful! So I pull off by Starbuck's outside trash bin and get him out to start the clean up...when he pukes again. This time all over me. Nice, thanks sweet-pea. ; )

With 80's music still playing in the background I hear a voice that says "Hey baby, lookin' good!". Of course I KNOW this person isn't speaking to me but I look up anyway out of curiosity. To my surprise I see a beat up old 80's something gold Firebird with a guy with a mullet and facial hair hanging out the window smiling...with no teeth. He repeated "Hey baby, you're lookin' fiiiiiine this mornin'. Whataya say I buy ya a biscuit at McD's." Yes, my idea of a dream date. McDonald's with a toothless drifter from the 80's who apparently doesn't notice that I'm covered in puke and have 2 toddlers with me. I politely smiled and said "Thanks for the offer but I'm married....and I have my 2 kids with me....and I'm covered in puke....but I appreciate the compliment!". He replied "Oh that's ok! I can afford 3 biscuits!" Wow really? Big spender,eh? This may be the man of my dreams lol. So anywho, that was that but I was left with the thought....Is he THAT desperate to come on to a woman who looked as bad as I did, covered in puke with 2 kids with her??? Or did he actually think I was desperate enough to accept his offer? It was super funny, though. Especially with the 80's music setting the stage. ♥

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Mrs. - posted on 03/03/2011

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That is the perfect example of how little a lot of guys care about things like makeup, hair or a little puke. If you're breathing and within the ages of 18-80 - you're fair game.

[deleted account]

:D Are you sure it wasn't Charlie Sheen? :D

At least your Joe Dirt was young...the only ones who look twice at me are the old men sitting on park benches.

I recently had an old man ask me, "are you married?"
Yessir.
"do you fool around?"
NO SIR!
"will you hold still while I do?"

Amber - posted on 03/04/2011

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pregnant women are gorgeous, that's why :) i know i feel pretty beautiful!

[deleted account]

I have another funny one- A few years ago I was going to a tanning salon to get 'ready' for vacation and this adorable little 17-18 year old boy always talked to me so much and was such a little gentleman. Then one day he walked me to my car, and I noticed that the girls who worked there were giggling and whispering as we were walking out but I didn't think a whole lot of it bc you know young girls do that kind of thing. So He followed me to my mom-mobile-mini-van complete with "Baby On Board" tag and Winnie The Pooh baby blind and he says "Ahhh man, you got stuck with your moms car today!" and I was like "No sweetie, I AM the mom". The look on his face was priceless! He said "You have kids already???" and I said "Yes, and a husband. I'm 35 years old." He just kept saying "Really? No way! No way!", it was the funniest thing. I don't wear my wedding rings to the tan salon bc I'm afraid Ill forget them bc of taking them off for the tanning lotion. One of the little girls (little girls- I sound so old lol) in there told me later that he thought I was in college and had a crush. So then everytime I went they would tease him and say "Joey, Mrs. Hernandez is here!" like I was Mrs. Robinson. : p

42 Comments

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Mary Renee - posted on 03/06/2011

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Hey, I would just take it as flattery that this guy wants you to like him even though you're covered in puke.

I think I got pissed a few times when guys hit on me and I was freaking pregnant. A guy pulled his car over to woohoo and cat call and I was just like "Really! Really? I'm 7 months pregnant you weirdo!" and they were like "Uh...that's ok..." Haha. After I continued walking I honestly couldn't help but smile because hey! I still look hot even when I'm 7 months pregnant.

Nonetheless, I love when I get the rare occasion to go out with girlfriends for drinks and guys come over to hit on us. My favorite thing to do is tell them I have a daughter and that it's ok if they want to go hit on another girl that's actually available. Then they're always like "No no, that's cool, that's great, let me buy you a drink" and then they run away and never come back, hahahahahaha.

Charlie - posted on 03/06/2011

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LOL that is awesome , I used to have guys hit on me while I was pregnant too I'm pretty sure it's the belly cause I've always had the boobs .....it kinda weirded me out LOL

[deleted account]

Oh I miss being hit on, it always made me laugh...I suppose it's my fault though because I've stopped going to dodgy bars and only seem to socialise with mommies and close friends now lol

ME - posted on 03/06/2011

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I got hit on all the time while I was pregnant with # 2, often while pushing #1 in the stroller...I used to have time to go for walks back then...One particular time, I was walking behind the stroller when some guys in a pick up truck drove past me and whistled at me, then came around the block again and asked if I wanted to go have a drink somewhere...yep...a DRINK. I was clearly pregnant, and clearly responsible for a baby..I have also had young men offer to sell me drugs while pushing my baby in a stroller...I'm not sure if that says more about me and the way I look, or about men these days...

[deleted account]

LMFAO! What does it say about me that I've never been hit on....puke, poop and messy attire aside.

Nobody loves me! ;)

[deleted account]

lol..i got hit on more pregnant then i do now or before i got pregnant, whats with that.I was 8mths pregnant one of the times and a group of building workers had a right whistle at me while i was struggling to get to my docs appointment in the heat & i walked the whole way..oh god i nearly died..i say i was blushing so bad.Pure embarrestment..lol

Amber - posted on 03/04/2011

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hahaha with my hubby it's not the belly it's the boobies ;p
i think rebecca hit the nail right on the nose with ths one :D

Bonnie - posted on 03/04/2011

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Bahahaha Stephanie, it was probably the 80s music that attracted the guy first, especially with describing what he was listening to and what he looked like. Then he saw you and was attracted to you. I would say he seemed desperate.

Free food though! You should have gone for it!
Just kidding :-)

Bonnie - posted on 03/04/2011

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OMG my husband tells me i'm a MILF and he has had people we know tell him i'm a MILF! I'm like, are you really suppose to be telling me this?? LOL

Stifler's - posted on 03/04/2011

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I only have a LIKE button. I don't even have ratings anymore just "like". It's good I always wanted to just LIKE things instead anyway.

[deleted account]

Sal- That deserves like 20 funny clicks!!!! LMAO!!!! There's nothing like the stench of puke & poop to get a guy all worked up lol. ; )

Sal - posted on 03/03/2011

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just love it.....i do recall walking into a cafe, looking at my jeans to realise i had baby poo on them....(yep looking hot) searching desperatly for a wet one and bumping into someone i knew who said, god you look wonderful today.....yep all but the poo!

Nikkole - posted on 03/03/2011

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lol :) my husbands friend hit on me every time we saw him when i was pregnant after i had our daughter he was like "so you plan on getting pregnant again soon?" uh no don't think soo :P

Stifler's - posted on 03/03/2011

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i think those men are my husband. when i had logan he was like you need to hurry up and get pregnant again i have no belly to cuddle.. i'm like............ what....!

Stifler's - posted on 03/03/2011

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i used to get bogans driving past in their car with their elbows hanging out looking me up and down pushing the pram. now i just waddle it's so unsexy they just keep driving.

Nicole - posted on 03/03/2011

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I find that it is always when I have sworn off men, am messy, its exam week, I am covered in something the baby created and I just hate everyone that men ask me out. Never just one, I get asked out by a few men in a day.

I don't get it!

I've had many men ask me out each time I was pregnant. (maybe its the glow?)

Nikkole - posted on 03/03/2011

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LOL ive been out in public looking like i am homeless before :) the joys of being a mom!!

Mrs. - posted on 03/03/2011

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Of course, I'm generally pretty pleased these days if some real life version of a toothless hobbit hits on me. The stroller is a pretty good cock block generally but lately I should win some sort of award for not caring how my clothing or hair looks.

Nikkole - posted on 03/03/2011

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lol yea we have it but i can't remember it :P i should have it on me because i always seem to get weirdos hitting on me!

Stifler's - posted on 03/03/2011

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haha do you have a reject line over there? over here there's a number you can give miscreants that ask for your number and they ring it and it's like "you have called the rejection line... " and all this other mean stuff about how you never want to see them again.

Nikkole - posted on 03/03/2011

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This was too funny! I have actually had a similar thing happen at the mall! I was out with my daughter who was 4months at the time (my son was with his grandma for the day) and we were shopping for some new clothes for her and i was dressed in jeans and a baggy tshirt and my hair was black with purple high lights, no makeup, and i had baby spit up on me (my daughter spit up ALL over me right before we went in) and some gangster wanna be (he was about 17-18) came up to me and said "HEY GURL your F*&%$#@ FIIIINNNNEEE" i was thinking to myself "REALLY my luck" i just said thanks and tried to ignore him BUT he wouldn't leave he was driving me nuts (i hadn't had a full night sleep in 4months so i was kinda cranky) He finally asked me "Can i have your digits BABE?" I said no im married i swear 100 times and then he asked again for my digits and That was the LAST straw i looked at him and said " NO you can not have my PHONE NUMBER, Do i look like im interested in some thug wanna be, do i have desperate mom written on my forehead, NO so why don't you do yourself a favor and go learn proper English and look for a girl somewhere else!!!!!" needless to say he walked away VERY RED and the guys at the cell phone place over heard the conversation and they couldn't stop laughing! I know i was a little harsh but i mean he wouldn't take thank you for the compliment and no thank you im married for an answer!

Jascinta - posted on 03/03/2011

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hahaha-thats hilarious... i remember one day i was in a second hand store 6mths pregnant and pushing my then 10mth old around in the pram while my partner was next door in the 'car stuff' shop. when these two guys come over and start chatting me up, and asking me if i wanted to go out somewhere with them that night. i was like you've got to be kidding?!? the same things you said when through my head. lmao. i told them i was waiting for my partner, etc then walked off. i'm sure they had to be desperate!!!!

[deleted account]

Marina- Maybe he has a 'puke girl' fetish thinking back on his glory days of the 80's going to metal concerts and getting wasted. He was the guy who looked for the puke girl bc he knew she was the drunkest which translates to easiest lol. I'm his dream woman! : p

Oh my kid wasn't really 'sick sick'. He just has a sensitive gag reflex so when he choked a little bit it triggered him to gag and puke. He's fine now, though, thanks. : )

Stifler's - posted on 03/03/2011

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Hahahahahahahaha. I think some people are just weird. The old men at work used to hit on my and I would be dripping in sweat after showers and linen change and serving breakfast. It was so wrong but so funny.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/03/2011

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BAHAHAHAHAHAHA...this is classic! You drew him in with your 80's rock hot momma covered in PUKE!!!! Love it! You should have gotten the McD's!!! Freaking great!

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