At what age is it innappropriate for your child to see you naked!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/25/2010 ( 34 moms have responded )

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I would like to hear what people think. My son is 4 years old, and he is starting to understand what "I need privacy" means, but he still sees mommy naked. What age age do you think that needs to stop and why? Also, should the age be sooner when they are the opposite sex of the naked parent?

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Tara - posted on 08/31/2010

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I don't and never have had an issue with any of my kids seeing me naked. It is just a body. They have one too!
I think when we start acting as if there is something to cover up and/or acting embarrassed when they do see us in the nude we are just perpetuating the idea that there is something shameful about the human body in it's uncovered state.
Teaching kids about modesty is important, and respecting other peoples feelings regarding nudity is a good lesson to make sure they learn, however in a family situation I don't see a need to make an age limit on when family nudity must end. Kids will avert their eyes, leave the room, turn around etc. when they get to an age of not wanting to see their parents or siblings naked, it is our job to read those cues and respect them.
My kids see me naked a lot, we swim in our pool in the nude before bed every night (just my littlest ones, not my 14 year old). Although my son has no issue with family nudity, he has seen me nurse 4 other kids after him, it's not biggie to see a nipple or boob hanging out in our house!
Again, we teach modesty when out in public or at other peoples homes, but at home, if you want to be nakey to go swimming or to sleep when it's hot, or walk to or from the shower, change in the playroom (where all the laundry baskets seem to end their journey). etc. it's not a problem.
When we went camping a few years back, we all walked around nakey as we were backcountry camping and there was no one around the miles!
I'm Finnish and when I was growing up my whole Finnish side of the family would have Saunas together, young right up to ancient, lol all of us naked and to top it off the adults would beat each other with fresh Birch switches over the shoulders and back to promote circulation.
So to each their own, but nudity is a non-issue in our house.
tara

[deleted account]

My 8.5 year old girls still see me naked. My 2.5 year old son sees me naked. It's not like I flaunt around them, but if they see me while I'm getting in/out of the shower... so be it. All 3 of my kids are 'nudists' though. It should stop when someone becomes uncomfortable w/ it.... and that IS why. ;)

If nudity isn't a big deal in the family then it's quite possible that it never becomes 'inappropriate'.

Chrystal - posted on 08/31/2010

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I think as a a parent you know when it's time to stop letting your child see you naked. If you feel that it is wrong for your child to be seeing you naked, then it's probably time to stop.

C. - posted on 08/28/2010

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I know when someone asked this a while ago, I said 2.. PSSSSHHHH.. Whatever. How naive of me. My son (who is 2) sees me changing my clothes every now and then. Especially when my husband is at PT and I need the car, so I have to be ready when he gets home to take him to work and go wherever I need to be. Perhaps when he gets uncomfortable with the idea?? Still trying to figure that one out for myself.

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Barbara - posted on 08/31/2010

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My old parents still walk around naked in front of us. I've never found it weird at all. My mom used to jump in the shower with me to save time and water when I was living there. I used to take 40 minute showers as a teenager, so she had a point! I remember having a boyfriend who thought that was absolutely crazy and disgusting, but you know what? She's my mom! I came out of her! If she can't be naked in front of me, than who can?

My dad will take any excuse to be naked. He's just a naked kind of guy. It's not a sexual thing, it's a comfort thing. Your family is supposed to be your people, the ones you can go to with everything, and be ultimately comfortable with no matter what. They are the ones who are pretty much for sure not going to be ogling you or judging your body harshly. Why worry about nudity with your family? I don't get this issue at all.

LaCi - posted on 08/31/2010

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" I tried being in the bath with him once but it weirded me out a lot so i haven't done it again"

I'm weird about that too lol. I thought it was just me. Although I do shower while he's in the bath, the shower is right next to the tub. I think it has more to do with being in his dirty water than nudity. Bleh.

Richardson - posted on 08/30/2010

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Maybe it's different for me since I'm a stepmom but I would never allow my stepsons (4 and 9) to see me naked. EVER. My husband however freely goes naked in front of them. I might feel differently if I have my own children.

[deleted account]

I came from an all girl family so I've always felt awkward being naked around my son (despite the fact i'm really comfortable with my body I just don't find it appropriate) I know he's only 9 months but I just feel really uncomfortable. I tried being in the bath with him once but it weirded me out a lot so i haven't done it again

[deleted account]

I think boys start to get uncomfortable with either sex seeing them around the time they start school. Girls, especially if they have sisters, tend to be less worried with the same sex of their family.
At least that seems to be how it worked out within my own family.
I'm curious what other people have observed.
Really there is no wrong answer here. It's really about what everyone's individual comfort level is.

[deleted account]

When one or the other person starts to feel uncomfortable.
For some kids that stage may never happen. Though it will likely happen with the boys.

If someone is uncomfortable then they should not be made to feel bad about it. It should be explained that some people like their privacy and others don't care.
And I already know that as my son gets older I will have less issue with him seeing me naked then my husband will having him see him naked.
He's almost 2 right now so really doesn't care about clothing and is very interested in why Mommy and Daddy have different body shapes.

He apparently understood what I meant when I said boys have penis's and girls don't because when at my Grandfather's farm a couple of weekends ago we were looking at a the herd of cattle in the field and he proudly proclaimed to all my Aunts and Uncles that the "Big Moo had a 'enis" and then went around telling all the men that they had one too.

My husband would have died of embarrassment if he had been present. I just laughed.

But really when it comes down to it, what age to stop is when people become uncomfortable with it.

Jodi - posted on 08/26/2010

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@ Erin. Taylah used to walk into shops and point people out saying "He is a boy, he has a penis. She is a girl, she has a 'gina". I thought it was hilarious. Ok, we got some funny looks but *shrugs*. She eventually learned a little more discretion.

Krista - posted on 08/26/2010

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I feel pretty much the same as everybody else here. I have no issue with my kids seeing me nude. Once they feel uncomfortable with it, they'll let me know. And it's not like I walk around the house naked anyway -- it's just when changing and showering.

Ez - posted on 08/26/2010

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In my opinion we should also be sure that our children know the real names and are comfortable using them.

Milla certainly is. She started pointing at her crotch and asking 'what's that?' a few weeks ago. I told her it was her vagina, and she tells me atleast 3 times a day where her 'gina' is lol.

Charlie - posted on 08/26/2010

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I really believe if people were less uptight about nudity there would be less of an interest in the body as a sex object , video clips , advertisements ect would have less of an effect on people who are comfortable and familiar with the wide array of body types and inevitably more comfortable within their own skin .

All covering up did for people was encourage the "sex sells" campaign after all its the lure of the taboo .

Jodi - posted on 08/26/2010

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I agree with you Teresa. It has a name, I don't get why we have to make up nicknames. In my opinion we should also be sure that our children know the real names and are comfortable using them.

But that's another topic :)

[deleted account]

Sorry for making a comment about it. It just disturbs me when people refer to the vagina w/ cutesie or food names especially. It is what it is. :)

LaCi - posted on 08/26/2010

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I don't think there needs to be a limit. By the time they understand everything and realize that's their mom and she's naked *ew, gross mom!* they'll be leaving you alone ;)

Mandy - posted on 08/26/2010

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I don't think nudity is a big issue. It's more down to when the particular child, usually around 7 or 8, starts to become aware of what it means to be embarrassed, then I would start closing doors, not going into the bathroom. Opposite sex parents are also down to what the parent and child is comfortable with. Personally I ask my husband to wear underwear to bed to prevent our 5 year old daughter seeing what is perfectly normal for a guy in the morning, he does still give her a bath and she does walk into the bathroom when he's having a shower, she usually just goes oops sorry daddy.
I think that making our bodies something we need to hide gives kids, girls especially, issues with body image. I grew up in a household where nudity was a huge taboo, and sadly I was abused by the man who was supposed to be my step-father. Maybe this colours my opinion but I see that covering up is more of a problem.

Jenni - posted on 08/26/2010

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i've never liked the word 'vagina' it reminds me of getting pap smears.

Jenni - posted on 08/26/2010

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I'm sure it all comes down to what the family is comfortable with. I'm sure in the case of nudists it's not an issue ever. For me... I have a 3 yr old SD and 2 yr old son. I am currently nursing and I don't feel uncomfortable allowing them to see me nurse. They are naturally curious about how the baby eats. When i first brought her home they were trying to feed her their cheerios. :O When they first seen me nurse my step-daughter exclaimed: "The baby eat you boob?!" I explained to her that the baby was drinking the milk from my boob. Now she is convinced that she also has boobs and made a point of telling her Grandmother so. Another time she seen me holding my breast to the baby and brilliantly told me: "you hold your little boob!" Ummm thanks for noticing. The first time my son witnessed it i was in a bit of pain and said "ow ow ow" when my daughter latched on. My son got this worried look and came to my defence: "NO BABY NO!!!!" But now it's completely natural to them and they pay no notice and no comments.
As far as the waste down, I personally don't feel comfortable about it and i don't believe they've seen my muffin since they were a year old. My husband started covering up right after his daughter noticed something different about daddy and made a grab for it!

Caitlin - posted on 08/26/2010

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My husband refuses to let our daughter (21 months) ever see him naked. I think it's silly, she's going to learn that boys have penises eventually. Oh well, to each his/her own.

Johnny - posted on 08/26/2010

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When the child expresses the desire not to see the parents naked. Or if a parent personally feels uncomfortable. I do not think that there is any set age. When I was around 5, my father decided that he didn't think I should see him naked anymore so I didn't. No big deal. My husband may choose to do something similar, although he's sort of a "naked" guy, so perhaps not. I personally don't see nudity as anything inappropriate at any time within a family, unless someone expresses discomfort.

Lindsay - posted on 08/26/2010

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I feel it's to do with the comfort level also. We are very relaxed about it in our home. While Josh and I don't go out of our way to walk around the house naked, if the kids walk in when we are changing or showering we don't go out of our way to cover up. We just go own about our business. The kids have yet to show any desire for privacy but when they do, it will be respected. And I also assume that if/when they are uncomfortable seeing either of us naked, they will quit walking in our room when the door is closed or in the bathroom when the shower is on.

Ez - posted on 08/25/2010

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I see it as a total non-issue until someone, either parent or child, expresses the desire for more privacy. My daughter is only 18mths, but already point and asks 'what's that?'. No big deal.. I tell her and we move on to talking about something else.

I don't have a son, but I imagine I would start feeling the need to instill some boundaries at some point before puberty.

Jodi - posted on 08/25/2010

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When they or you feel uncomfortable about it, whether same or opposite sex. Honestly, it is a personal choice. I don't think you should stop just because others say you should. My 5 year old still walks into the bathroom when daddy has a shower. My almost 13 year old has no qualms being naked around us. I am uncomfortable being naked around my son (I mean, he's hit pubert), but I'm ok with my daughter. A very personal family thing. Do what works for you. There shouldn't be any set rules other than what feels right.

Jaime - posted on 08/25/2010

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I have heard of entire families having a sauna naked together....brothers, sister, mom and dad. Not in North America of course, that's far too risque for us! I don't have an issue with nudity in front of my son when he's older, but I don't think I'll be walking around the house naked either.

[deleted account]

Right now it's a non-issue for us. I haven't thought too much about it, but we'll probably keep my daughter from walking in on my husband in the bathroom sometime before school age.

Charlie - posted on 08/25/2010

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I still see my mum naked , no big deal if we ( my mum , my sister and i ) are all getting ready in the same room we rip our clothes off and get changed while we chat its a non issue and nothing weird about it at all we all have a healthy respect for the female body .

Dad on the other hand he wouldnt generally be comfortable naked around us , he likes privacy ive accidently walked in on him getting changed and just said " oh sorry " and walked out , also not a big deal but i respect his privacy .

I guess its just what each individual is comfortable with .

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