Bigamist Husband

Senia - posted on 08/21/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Sooo recently I found out that my soon to be ex husband has already jumped the gun and remarried a couple months ago. What's funny is that he always denied he was dating this woman, engaged to her, and so forth. Next thing I know, all communication is lost, and they are married. It wasn't hard to figure it out seeing that Facebook has become the new Newspaper and his new wife was more than eager to post their "extravagant" wedding. (It was a little over the top for a sham wedding that legally is null and void).
Anywho, he and I have a 5 year old together, whom he rarely speaks to or visit with. (Last time was when she was 3 years old). I don't pressure him, because my boyfriend has been around for her since she was 2 and is the one she knows as "Papi". Her bio-father still has some growing up to do.
Well he has moved on and I am dying to (legally on paper because emotionally it been done), yet it is so difficult to get the divorce because he continues to move around so his new "wife" will not find out that he is still married to me.
Eventually she did find out by me. I need this divorce and figured if she really wants him maybe she can help me get it done and they can legitimize theirs.
Here's the thing though, she has a daughter of her own who is about a year or two younger than mine. The ex "raises" her as if she were his own and cares not a bit about his own. (That's okay though, like I said, he has some growing up to do.) But now this "perky" wife of his is trying to force him to have a relationship with our daughter. I just want the divorce is all. And She has decided to start texting for me to send pictures of my lil one to her because he hasn't seen her in forever, and she's a mom too so she knows how I must feel. (She doesn't! Her baby-daddy is well involved in her daughter's life and has always been.) Uggh I don't like her meddling in my daughter's life making demands of me. And I definitely do Not like her trying to "mend" the relationship my daughter has with her father, especially when she is the only one putting out effort to do so! It should be his choice and decision alone. Let me know your opinions on that aspect.
But lastly, about their marriage. SInce he has run all this time from the divorce, and has decided to remarry, and also has run my name thru the dirt to his family, and our mutual friends, I'm pretty pissed. I wanted his new wife's help but I'm irritated with the "extra effort" she is putting in. Why would she want to reunite him with our daughter when she clearly has been lied to their whole relationship!?!? I want to call the Sheriff to prosecute him for this sham wedding! Seems a bit overboard at times, but it has gotten to the point where now I have another irritating person in this equation! And also because now that "wifey" knows the truth, she is more than determined to keep this secret from her family (who supports them both and paid for the lavish wedding) and his family (who think shit of me but the world of them both). PLEASE let me know what you think of this whole situation!! :))

(Oh and another thing, I want a change of last name for my daughter.. do you think that would be wrong of me to ask for it?? I wouldn't think so since he is not really around.. )

4 Comments

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S. - posted on 08/22/2012

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Please do keep me up dated senia :) it honestly sounds like you had a lucky escape.

Senia - posted on 08/21/2012

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Stacey,

Your response made me laugh! I don't like to speak bad of others but in this case I want to. Lol. She is a bit dumb, naive, and immature. And I only say this because she is one of the ones that introduced he and I. She's a few years younger than he and I, and ran in a circle that his friends ran in. Whats sad is that he would always make fun of her back in the day about her looks and style, and till this day she looks the same. So why she chose to be with him is beyond me. To each their own. There is no jealousy here, just awe and confusion, oh and irritation!
I think I will send the name change papers. It doesn't seem like he would really have an option about it.
I'll keep you updated so check back! ;)

S. - posted on 08/21/2012

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Wow! That sounds like it could be a T.V program, if I was you I'd of already phoned the police/ sheriff and as for the wifey she sounds a bit dumb tbh but also she sounds like she's trying to do what she ' thinks' best, I'd tell her to butt out an if her "husband" wanted to see his daughter he could take you to court.
I am sorry i have no real advice for you but what I think of the whole situation is that it's mental and I'd love to be in the mind of your ex when He though getting married again was a good idea! And as for her name I'd ask away at least your trying to fallow the law un like him. P.s I would love to know how this all pans out, good luck :)

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