Cleaning

Mechelle - posted on 05/12/2011 ( 86 moms have responded )

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My fiance and I just had a discussion last night. We were talking about if we had another child anytime soon when our 2 that are already here are still so young, he would want to hire a person to come in and clean so that I could spend more time with my children.

I was talking to a friend about it and she was very irritated. She also has 2 children and basically put me down and accused me of being lazy and allowing a stranger to come into my house and do chores.

My question is, if it was offered to you and you were financially able, would you allow someone to clean for you so that you could spend more time with your children? I'm not talking about a live in nanny or someone to watch your children so you can do whatever, whenever. I'm only talking about someone who comes in and does the basic chores that take up so much of your day.

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Sharon - posted on 05/16/2011

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LMAO@the idea of that if you feel you need a housecleaner to get more spare time, you are incapable of time management.



That is asinine. Hiring a cleaner means I HATE laundry. I hate scrubbing floors. I hate organizing the closets.



I have plenty of time to spend with my kids, but I'm a greedy ass bitch and I want more.



Between my job, their schooling, extra curricular activities and life in general - I will always want more time with my kids.

Kylie - posted on 05/12/2011

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Absolutely I would! If i won lotto the first thing i would do would be hire a cleaner and a chef. Your hubby's a keeper :)

Jamie - posted on 05/14/2011

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I came across this poem when my first time mom(daughter) was stressing b/c she couldn't get all her house work done, only 2 weeks after a c-section lol Enjoy! Babies Don't Keep
Mother, oh Mother,
come shake out your cloth,
empty the dustpan,
poison the moth,
hang out the washing
and butter the bread,
sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house
is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery,
blissfully rocking.
Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little
Boy Blue (lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping's not done
and there's nothing for stew
and out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
but I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
The cleaning and scrubbing
will wait till tomorrow,
for children grow up,
as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs.
Dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep'
~Author Unknown ~

Emma - posted on 05/16/2011

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Who wouldn't want someone to clean your house, regardless of whether you had kids! That's a no brainer, but if you can't afford it, maybe the husbands could just help out more by cleaning as much as their wives..lol!

[deleted account]

Without a doubt!! I have that now and we are only expecting our second one this summer. It has made life so much easier and less stress. I can come home and just be with my family! I was doing it all before but I am the main bread winner and it was getting hard to find enough hours in the day and the housework was one thing that suffered... We are a very active family always doing something and i wasn't about to turn down the help. I have always been independent but sometimes, and I don't care how organized or good you are at time management, you need help for your own piece of mind. If you are frazzled then it shows and I didn't enjoy how I felt being under all that pressure to be the role model career woman and perfect mother and my relationships were suffering. I have more one on one time with my daughter and husband and I don't think I am failing my daughter by having help.... It takes a village. :)

86 Comments

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Carol - posted on 05/18/2011

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Absolutely, if you can afford it, go for it! Cleaning sucks, and hanging out with your kids is the best!

I can't afford a cleaner, so my house is a mess but my kids are happy because we do a lot of fun things together!

Jenn - posted on 05/18/2011

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Hells yes I would have a housekeeper! My sister's husband got her one but use is so anal, she cleans the house before the housekeeper comes..ha!!

[deleted account]

My first reaction would be no because the idea of a stranger coming in and dealing with my mess bugs me, but bottom line it would be amazing to have the extra time with the kids and sooooo worth it. My grandma actually had this and said it was amazing, and she was the same way as I am so knowing that she thought it was idiotic of her not to take the opportunity sooner makes me think if offered hell yeah it'd be worth it and a great idea! My stepmom has a cleaning lady for her and my dad and they absolutely love her, they don't even have kids! Yeah if I could afford it that would be awesome, dishes alone take up way too much of my time and I'd much rather be doing more crafts and activities with my son.

Azza - posted on 05/18/2011

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Michelle Of course go ahead , don't let any one stop you from managing your life the way it suits you.As long as you are financially able to aford some one to come and help you with the basic chores, why not ??!! 2 children are of course a burden and you need some one to help so you can have enough time to spend with ur fiancee . Keeping the house and looking after children all on your own is really consuming one's health. I think you deserve to get yourself pampered a little bit if anyone else sees it that way.

Michelle - posted on 05/18/2011

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ABSOLUTELY! It's not lazy, use that spare time not only for your kids, but quality time for your self too.

Krista - posted on 05/18/2011

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Oh, and your friend needs to get the jealous stick out of her bum.

Krista - posted on 05/18/2011

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if it was offered to you and you were financially able, would you allow someone to clean for you so that you could spend more time with your children?

HELL, yeah!!!

I'm perfectly capable of keeping my house clean, even though I work full-time. But jeez, if I could free up some of that time and have even THAT much more time for us to spend together as a family? While providing someone with honest work? Ye gods, that's win-win-win.

We're looking at getting someone in every couple of weeks, for the big jobs -- windows, light fixtures, cleaning out the fridge, wiping out the cupboards, washing the baseboards, things like that. The basic dusting and vacuuming is easy. Even bathrooms are easy. But those big jobs are a pain in the arse, especially when you have a sticky-fingered toddler wanting to "help". So if I can come home from work and the cleaning fairies have scrubbed out my fridge for me or washed my windows, then that's plenty fine with me.

And don't worry: my kids will know how to clean.

Kari - posted on 05/18/2011

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I would definitely take him up on the offer! It sounds like your friend might be a little jealous. She shouldn't feel that way because I think most people can't afford to hire someone to do their cleaning for them, but she shouldn't take it out on you.

Alisha - posted on 05/18/2011

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That would be an easy yes for me! I wouldn't want someone here everyday but maybe once or twice a week to come in a do a deeper cleaning and some organizing. That would be nice! I am about to have my third and we have a 5 year old and a 3 year old and it's hard to get everything done now and still be able to play with my kids and interact with them and take them to their activities (preschool, T-ball, play dates) I am only imagining with the third this will get harder! I do have to say though that my husband is pretty self sufficient, so this does help! He helps with the cooking, dishes and laundry. So he will most likely just have to step it up a notch since we are not lucky enough to afford extra help around the house =)

Sal - posted on 05/17/2011

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go for it, i am jealous!!!!! but seriously if you can afford it why not your kids are only little for such a short time and being able to enjoy it and have a small break from chores would be wonderful, i don;t know if i'd have a dedicated cleaner but maybe a mothers helper (thats what my freind calls her after noon girl), she comes in for a few hours a couple of times a week and doesn anything, house work, cooks dinner, bathes the kids, lets mum have a nap or bath in peace run to the store, what ever she is falling behind with that day, that would be heaven. or a babysitter for date night more often maybe..

[deleted account]

In some cultures (like Botswana), anyone who can afford household help should do it, because it creates a job for someone else. It's like a moral obligation.



I wouldn't want a nanny to take care of my son, but I wouldn't hesitate to hire someone to help me out.

Stifler's - posted on 05/17/2011

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I don't see the big deal... and so what if it IS lazy? Who likes cleaning? I don't.

Becky - posted on 05/16/2011

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Absolutely! I hate cleaning, and to be honest, I don't do nearly as much of it as I should. It's not a time management issue, it's a lack of motivation issue. My house isn't filthy or unsanitary, my dishes are done, the kids have clean clothes, etc, but I could certainly dust more often than I do, and my windows haven't been washed since I don't know when! I wouldn't have someone there everyday, but once a week or so to do a deep clean, sure, why not?

Laurie - posted on 05/16/2011

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If I could have had help when my kids were home, maybe I would remember those years better. There was so much to do that I hardly had a chance to sleep. Without sleep, you won't remember. Go for it ,girl. Naysayers are just jealous. She wants it but isn't able to have it so she is taking it out on you. Make sure you tell your fiance, in words and deeds, how much you appreciate this priceless offer. signed: I wish I could do it all over differently.

Jane - posted on 05/16/2011

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In a New York minute! I hate cleaning and if I could afford a cleaner I would be delighted.

[deleted account]

Bet your boots I would! That's a fantastic idea! Good on your hubby for offering.

P.S. I think you need a new friend

Johnny - posted on 05/16/2011

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Absolutely. If I could afford to have someone come to clean my house to free up the time I'm doing that so that I could have more time with my daughter and particularly my spouse (I tend to spend daytime not cleaning so I can be with my daughter and save it for after she is in bed, so hubby loses out a bit) I would jump on the chance for sure.

If I had the spare cash to employ a person, give someone a job, why wouldn't I. If you look at it that way, you could even consider it miserly not to hire someone to do it when you could afford to give someone paying employment in a tough economy.

I work part-time now and will be full-time in the fall. I miss my daughter for every minute. I can never get that time back. I would take every second that I could.

Marci - posted on 05/16/2011

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I absolutely would allow someone to clean for me so that I could spend more time with my children. However, keep in mind that when you have someone come in to clean, you do have a certain amount of cleaning and upkeep you have to do so that they can do their job. This applies mostly to the actual cleaning companies like Merry Maids.

ME - posted on 05/16/2011

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I have (what amounts to) a full time job and two small kids...if someone offered me a cleaning person, I would be so happy I'd hurt myself doing back flips...I wouldn't feel bad about it for a second. I can stay on top of the daily stuff no problem, but a good deep clean a few times a month would give me way more time with my kids. I also have a chronic pain disorder tho...and cleaning is really hard for me...I can't work on it for long periods of time...

[deleted account]

IMO I think anyone with kids should be able to clean their own home and still spend plenty of time with their kids. By having someone come in you are basically saying (to me) that you are incapable of time management, the ability to do it yourself, and incapable of teaching your children to pick up after themselves. (remember IMO) I have 4 kids varying in age but my 2 youngest are back to back in age. I homeschool in addition to doing everything else around the house. I don't see a problem why women (or SAHDad's) can't get it all done. It isn't that hard and I would be very insulted if my husband had the nerve to say he wants one if we had more kids.
I firnly believe that if you love teaching your kids, spending time with them and being home with them then you should have no problem doing your job as a SAHM. Time management and organization are the 2 key ingredients no matter if you have 1 child or 20.

[deleted account]

I would grab it in a hot minute. I'm working full time, have my son and chronically ill. The housework absolutely gets thrown to the wayside. I would LOVE to have someone come in to do the heavy stuff for me and even the light stuff once a week.

ShacKz - posted on 05/16/2011

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Honestly...i do not oppose to that idea at all...It would be a blessing that i have someone to come and help with the house draws a few hours each week.....because it allows me to spend time with my child........ mrs. mechelle i think if you can financially afford to hire someone you should....it will be beneficial to you and your family..."DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO FOR YOU N YOU FAMILY" that person perhaps can't afford to do that or her partner don't agree so she's "MAD" BOO HOO oh well.... this friend of yours seem more like she's jelous and a BIGG time "HATER"..... all i can say is don't let any outside influences cloud your judgement in any decissions that you have to make that concerns you and you family.... Amen!!!!!!!!!!

Lea - posted on 05/16/2011

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i would but i do feel better when i do things like that for myself. i dont like to depend on anyone to do anything for me. getting paid or not. it might leave you open to be judged and trashed behind yer back although its no one elses buisiness what you do. if yer a stay at home mom and you dont work are you gonna spend all that extra time with yer kids and are you gonna seriously pay attention to who you let in yer house? Something to really really think about... i freakin hate cleaning but there are tons of other stuff you could do ya know. i think bout those things all the time when i clean! :) be careful who you let in yer home! you dont want some weirdo comin in and messin up what you have either. good luck and God bless!

[deleted account]

yes i would!!! Its not saying anything worng. I mean everyone is capable of cleaning but who really wants to!! Shoot i only have one daughter and even before i had her i would hire someone to clean for me! i have no problem with it :D and i think its really cool your husband said that!

Ehllene - posted on 05/16/2011

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YES!!! I have a full-time live-in housekeeper who also cooks during the week. I work full-time outside the home and would rather spend my spare time with the kids than cook and clean any day.

Stifler's - posted on 05/14/2011

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Hell yes. Stuff cleaning if I could afford to make someone else do it.

Shastin - posted on 05/14/2011

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I don't wanty to look back and regret not spending time with my kids because I was cleaning.

LadyJane - posted on 05/14/2011

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Most definitely would I hire one if I had the funds... In fact that is exactly what I do, well on the opposite side. Me and my mom are the ones who get hired to clean other people's houses and it is awesome. We take the extra time to make sure it is done right. Most of the time the people are at home while we're cleaning and one is actually homeschooling her 5 now 6 kids in the basement while we're cleaning the main 2 floors of her house. Her oldest has MS so she is definitely not hiring us just because she can afford it, but so she can homeschool her kids and take care of her oldest daughter's health needs.

I would most likely go with a live in housekeeper/cook if I had the funds, I hate cooking, even though I'm a great cook, I just don't like it. But I'd have to win the lotto to do that, but until then my kids do know the importance of a clean house and so far have to pick up their own rooms first then they get other chores based on age and ability.

[deleted account]

There's nothing wrong with that.



We had a helper when we were young.She would clean mainly,but sometimes cook and babysit us to..she was a wonderful woman&family friend.Sadly she passed away years later when i was in my teens.:-(



I am a sahm.So for me i wouldn't need one.I clean at times my children are doing other things.My oldest is in school from 9 to 2.My daughter has her favourite programme in the day, so i clean up.Sometimes she loves to help.Which can be good fun, as she sings the clean up song lol.:-)

If i was a working mom, hell yes i would love nothing more.Even if you have one while being a sahm its fine to.Its what you want and feel is best.

[deleted account]

I work full time and would LOVE a house cleaner! We do have the finances for someone to come in once a month. But hubby is the one that says NO. :-( I so despise cleaning. I am a cluttered person, but I am not a slobby, gross, filthy person in the least bit. I would love someone to come in to help more with organization and light cleaning duties. Hmmmm, one day! But to go back to your original question, It really shouldn;t matter what anyone else thinks of yo uhaving a housekeeper if it's something mutually agreed upon. Your friend's opinion doesn;t count! It doesn;t matter if she's jealous or even angry. It's not her business.

[deleted account]

Hells yes I would and am considering it as we speak! I don't mind cleaning but it would be nice to have someone come in once or twice a week for the bigger stuff. My house is huge so it's not like it's an apartment that I have to clean, it's a 4 story house with a guest house that my husband uses as his office. The 4th floor is a livable attic, meaning it can be used as a storage attic or can be used as more bedrooms. We use it as storage so I don't routinely clean it. I do clean the other 3 though and it would be nice to have someone to detail the floors...that is a huge pain in the ass. We've hired window cleaners before bc really, how am I going to do that on my own and have someone who does the yard work. I wouldn't want someone to do all of it though bc it wouldn't feel 'homey' to me then. I'd just like help with some of the bigger, more time consuming chores.

Tara - posted on 05/14/2011

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OH GOD YES!!! And any bitch who dares to call me lazy for having someone else come in to clean my very old HUGE 7 bedroom, 3200 sq ft home can kiss my tired ass.
I HATE cleaning and laundry. And if I could afford it I would have a live in housekeeper. So that things were cleaned on a daily basis and nothing had to wait for me to finish doing all the real "mom" work.
Tell your friend if it irritates her so much she can come clean for you so you don't have to hire someone.

Nikki - posted on 05/14/2011

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Is your friend jealous? Hell yeah I would hire a cleaner and a laundry lady and a cook if I could afford it! There is nothing I hate more when I have cleaning to do and my daughter really wants to play with me. Usually I leave it and do it later but I hate it when I have to do something and she misses out. Go for it.

Mel - posted on 05/14/2011

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One of the places I stayed at when I was 17 had a house cleaner, I thought it was cool, I would ask them what to do with something when I first moved in they would always say "leave it there the cleaners will pick it up". I still had the normal chores though there and eveything was quite strict (the second the day cme for rent money Id be asked for it, Id ask to shower and theyd say no actually you can do dinner or something like that)

Jodi - posted on 05/14/2011

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When I worked full time and was a single mum, I had a cleaner come in once a week and do the big jobs. Bathrooms, mopping, walls, windows, dusting, all those things I just never had time for. I used to take care of the day to day stuff. There was still plenty of room for chores, such as loading and unloading the dishwasher, packing up toys, etc. I loved having a cleaner, and it took a huge burden off a single working mum. My house was always clean. Nowadays, I struggle to keep up, and I am often so busy, I am considering getting one. We can afford someone to come in once a week or so, and I would rather spend my time doing something else. Next year I will be going back to Uni, so yes, I will be getting a cleaner then.

Jenny - posted on 05/14/2011

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While I like the idea of not having to clean the house, having another person do it for me feels uncomfortable. I'm not quite sure why exactly though. Privacy is a part. I do like a clean house but I don't recommend you eat off my floor. It's more that I think of the cleaner not being able to afford a cleaner and working her tail off so I can be with my kids more. But, doesn't she need a job for money to buy that kid of hers food?

I dunno. I'm OK with it but don't think i would use the service. I'd rather have less stuff to clean in the first place.

Sharon - posted on 05/13/2011

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ABSOLUTELY!

Well actually, we already do. I work 3 days (well I did until I had baby #2, 3wks ago), and the other days I want to spend playing with my little ones.

I do the basics and we get a lady in every fortnight to do the dusting/toilet/bathroom/vac carpets/thorough kitchen clean etc, costs $50. Then once every 3mths we get her in to do a big clean, which includes the windows & oven (my fav to get someone else to do!!).

I'm lucky and only do the mopping of the floors, laundry, tidying, daily kitchen tasks etc. Plus anything else that may need attention. We don't leave mess around or anything intentionally knowing someone is coming next week to clean.



I have found it perfect for my c-section recovery too, as now I don't have any of that other stuff to worry about. Just my 2 little boys and healing :-)

Stacey - posted on 05/13/2011

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absolutely yes i would =) everybody is different, if your friends wants to clean 24/7 more power to her. me i would rather spend time with my kids then clean constantly.

Charlie - posted on 05/13/2011

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So I was thinking about this some more and I would leave certain jobs for the kids to do like their room , toys and clearing , stacking dishes .

Kate CP - posted on 05/13/2011

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I'm willing to bet she was just jealous that you could afford a maid service. ;)

Yes, if I could afford one I would TOTALLY hire a maid service.

Charlie - posted on 05/13/2011

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Of course I would , spend more time with my family , give a person a job , get a clean house .

Oh and I totally Agree with Sharon .

Katherine - posted on 05/13/2011

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Oh hey Sharon! Long time no see. Or at least I didn't know your pseudonym.


Now hell yes I would pay someone, I hate cleaning!!!!!

Sharon - posted on 05/13/2011

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Pft. No wonder so many people are happy to settle for mediocrity. "wouldn't want my boys growing up thinking they can pay someone to do everything for them, they might not be able to afford it," WTF about getting an education and aiming higher than trailer park living?

Absolutely my kids know (well at least the oldest) knows how to do dishes, laundry etc. I'm teaching him to cook. But they also see the benefit of the luxury of being able to afford paid HELP.

Crap happens and you can't afford it. Jobs are lost. Health care sucks the money out of you. Whatever. He sees that too. But "wouldn't want my boys growing up thinking they can pay someone to do everything for them, they might not be able to afford it," why the fuck set them up for failure? "gee hunny, lets not go there, you're probably gonna have a job with your name on your shirt." Nice goals.

[deleted account]

HELL YES! I would take it with both hands and runwith it and if anyone thought I was lazy I wouldnt care less! B/c being with my children while they are little and helping shape the adults they will become is the most important work of all. And if you ask me yr friend is jealous ;P

Vilma - posted on 05/13/2011

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Hey, if you found a good service, that help you to have more time to enjoy your family and fit your budget, why not, I know how hard is to work part time and care my kids, plus clean, cook, laundry,...at home. But find a service legal, or someone with background and references. Enjoy life. www.casabellacleaningservices.com

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