curiosity in toddlers when breast feeding newborn

Melissa - posted on 02/02/2011 ( 22 moms have responded )

472

1

12

Have any of you ever had your toddler want to breast feed because they see your newborn doing it? Is it wrong to let them try ? I thought it was abnormal til I went to a friends and 2 people were there and both said when they had a new baby they allowed their older child to try to breast feed (one was 3 the other was 4). Is it wrong when they have never been or not been breastf ed for a very long time before that and dont understqnd what it means? This is mainly for my own curiousity cause I allowed my older child to try( 2.5 yrs) and it grosed me out totally and felt like child abuse so I then explained milk is for the baby

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Bonnie - posted on 02/02/2011

4,813

22

262

Yeah I wouldn't do it just explain that the milk is for the baby because this is all the baby can have for quite awhile and it helps them to grow big and strong.

[deleted account]

Yes, my 2 youngest were breastfeeding at almost the same time. I was weaning my 1 yr old when my now youngest was born. So she hadn't even really finished weaning yet. However, It would seriously gross me out at well. However, I knew that it would so I never went there. I have always explained why the baby was eating from my breast, why they weren't allowed to anymore, and that they did use to do it when they were that little. However, I never hid it from my kids, and I never allowed to older kids to do it.

Melissa - posted on 02/02/2011

472

1

12

lol Shauna my daughter used to get hold of the breast pump as well and try use it that was funy

[deleted account]

Mandy, it's not strange at all. When my girls were 2 all their little friends were getting baby brothers and sisters. My girls started 'breastfeeding' ALL their dolls. :)

22 Comments

View replies by

Jenn - posted on 02/03/2011

2,683

36

96

Oh, and he used to "nurse" his teddy bears and dolls too. One of my (now ex) friends' daughter apparently started doing the same thing at home after watching me nurse, but my friend never did bf, so she got mad at her daughter and told her she was gross. Nice.

Jenn - posted on 02/03/2011

2,683

36

96

When I had my twins, my son was almost 3. He became interested and eventually wanted to try it, so I let him. Of course he didn't "remember" how to suckle properly so he got nothing out of my breast and lost interest very quickly. He never asked to try it again.

JuLeah - posted on 02/02/2011

3,133

38

694

Normal for them to ask, but I'd not let them ... they are too big and 'your body' rules apply. Yah, I think most would have the reaction you had and not do it a 2nd time.

Lady Heather - posted on 02/02/2011

2,448

17

91

Honestly, if I have another baby soon (hopefully October??) I will be tempted. This is just because my daughter wouldn't breastfeed. So if she decided she wanted to, I'd probably let her so long as she didn't bite. That's probably pretty dumb but I don't care. It would be really satisfying to see her finally figure it out. hehe.

Shauna - posted on 02/02/2011

1,015

19

35

I would just explain what is happening, but i did that before my baby was born to the oldest. And also explained all about the breast pump. However everytime company came over he would grab my breastpump and say YOU PUT YOUR BOOBS IN HERE!!! laughing hysterical

Amie - posted on 02/02/2011

6,596

20

412

Oh wait a minute... you mean let your older one BF off you?



There are people who BF (as Teresa mentioned) much longer. If it makes you uncomfortable though, you don't have too. There's nothing really wrong with it though.

Amie - posted on 02/02/2011

6,596

20

412

Toddlers are naturally curious, about everything. I wouldn't let her try to feed the baby, mostly I'd be concerned about her trying to do it at a moment your head is turned. If she was trying to lift the baby, she may drop her. =S

Does she have any baby dolls? She could play mommy and "feed" that. There's no need to buy the fancy breastfeeding dolls that are out there (one of the stupidest inventions ever, IMO) just a regular baby doll works fine. Our 3 year old has a ton of them and she's mommy to them all. When her brother or one of the dogs isn't trying to destroy them anyway. haha.

It's not abuse either, they're just learning about the world around them. Just explain that's how babies eat, simple and they will understand it. Mommies make milk for their babies too and it doesn't come in a carton. =)

[deleted account]

Well, my almost 3 year old IS breastfeeding and I'll never have another baby, so this will never come up. I didn't let my 6 year olds though. ;) After months of them being little pests I squirted some milk in a little medicine cup for them to try and they both chickened out. lol

Cassie - posted on 02/02/2011

0

0

182

I just want to add, when it comes to Kiera asking me, I'm not uncomfortable in the least with her nursing. Emma just had two teeth pop through and my nipples are sore as hell. I was really nervous that Kiera's teeth would make the situation so much worse for my poor nipples so we decided together that Emma needed the milk more.

Minnie - posted on 02/02/2011

7,076

9

788

My first was 2 1/2 when my second was born. She asked to nurse and I let her. She's asked maybe once a week since then up until oh, three or four months ago and now says she's 'too big' for mama's milk (her idea). She's nearly five.

It isn't sexual for the toddlers who ask. They are genuinely curious, and it's not like it's going to hurt them. It's just up to the mother and her comfort level. I was comfortable and it wasn't an issue for any of us, and she stopped asking when she grew tired of it. Her younger sister is still nursing at almost 2 1/2.

Melissa - posted on 02/02/2011

472

1

12

you think its not too wierd Kate lol. I just wouldnt want her try to do it around others. I do think its cute that as soon as baby wakes up or she cries my oldest says babys awake she needs a feed and got angry at me for using a bottle said thats not how shes fed

Kate CP - posted on 02/02/2011

8,942

36

758

It's not strange it's normal and a great thing that she's emulating such a natural form of parenting. I'd be proud of my daughter for "nursing" her baby doll!

Jenni - posted on 02/02/2011

5,928

34

393

I guess it comes down to what someone is comfortable with. Some mom's BF until their child is 4 or 5 years old and some beyond. Is it for me? no. So of course I wouldn't do it. However, I wouldn't call it child abuse there is no evidence that shows extended BFing is harmful and many mom's who do it feel they have their child's best interest in mind.
I have a 3 year old SD and 2 year old son. My newest addition is now nearly 9 months. So of course there was some curiousity from my two toddlers.
My SD never asked to BF lol! I would never consider allowing her to... I'd find it a bit weird and I'm sure her BM would be a bit creeped out! She has seen my BFing and naturally showed curiousity, asking me "The baby eat your boob??" cute... I explained the baby was drinking milk from my breast. Another time when I was holding my breast to my daughter she exclaimed: "You hold your 'little' boob?!?!" ummm yeah... thanks for noticing! Then of course she began telling everyone she too, had boobs. And that was that, now it's completely normal to her to see my feeding Morgan.
The first time my son seen me BFing (I stopped bfing him when he was 7 months) I screamed in pain when she initially latched on and he came to my defence: "NO BABY NO!" he scolded her. I also explained to him that is how the baby eats. Maybe a month later he was laying on me on the couch and out of no where "OUCH!" he bit my breast through my shirt. I'm guessing he thought he'd give it a try but that was the only time he tried. I think realizing he caused me pain was enough to not show anymore interest. If he did want to try It probably wouldn't gross me out to let him try and satisfy is curiousity. But to me he's still a baby himself. I don't really associate my breasts as being sexual at least in the context of feeding my children, so I don't see it as being dirty or child abuse. If my child was 4 or 5 I think they would be old enough to explain that BFing is really for babies. I think the real issue that can develop with bfing a new baby and older siblings and jealousy of time spent with the new baby and having to share intimicacy with Mom with the new baby. So it's important to set aside special time with older siblings and involve them as much as possible with baby's care.

Melissa - posted on 02/02/2011

472

1

12

lol Nicole my daugter tries to breast feed her dolls or stuffed toys its strange

Nicole - posted on 02/02/2011

736

6

98

My son saw another person breastfeed and I didn't know he had, and later he tried to breastfeed on me. I said a firm, "no!" and, "please respect my space". I was freaked out because I wasn't breastfeeding and didn't know that my ex-husband's girlfriend was. I thought he had seen something sexual.

I called my ex and said, "what is our son seeing in your home?"

When he explained that his girlfriend was breatfeeding it made more sense.

I am breastfeeding now and my son's response has been to want to breastfeed his sister. He keeps offering, "there's milk in my boobies too!"

I would not let an older child try breastfeeding, it would feel too weird to me

Kate CP - posted on 02/02/2011

8,942

36

758

Samantha has yet to ask about nursing...she's fascinated by the idea that milk comes out of my breasts to feed the baby but she hasn't asked me yet. If and when she does I'll probably express some for her and let her try it but being that she's 4 years old and hasn't nursed since she was 7-8 months of age I don't think I'll let her latch on. Not to mention she has a fake tooth and I don't know how well that would work...

Cassie - posted on 02/02/2011

0

0

182

Kiera has been asking a lot recently to nurse while I'm nursing Emma. I nursed her until she was about 17 months old. I just tell Kiera that she eats big girl foods and drinks but mommy's milk is the only thing Emma can eat so we need to save it for her. She seems happy with that explanation. :)

Joanna - posted on 02/02/2011

2,096

19

137

I was thinking about this the other day. I figured if my 3 year old shows heresy I will just explain that age gets her milk in a big girl cup, and babies are too little for them so this is how they get their milk. If she still wants to try, we will see from there... I'm not against letting her try, however I don't want it to turn into a normal thing. She's heavy :P

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms