Disciplining your child in public

Katherine - posted on 11/28/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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•Know what triggers certain behaviors and how you will enforce discipline if the child acts up while you are out. You know your child best and what things may trigger a tantrum or outburst. You want something that can be used anywhere and time-outs are good. Eye up the time-out spot immediately upon entering. It can be along a wall, a quiet corner or even in the car. A time-out is effective during times when the child is unable to control their behavior and needs time to cool down.

•2
Inform your child about what behavior you expect him to exhibit while you are out. If you are going grocery shopping, tell him he must stay near, not run off and to ask permission before touching anything. Tell your child the rules and the consequences if they are broken. Let him know it will be a time-out, revoking of a privilege or leaving the store.

•3
Set very clear boundaries, expectations and follow through. Consistency is the key to teaching your child good behavior. Do not get discouraged. Every child acts up from time to time. You may endure stares form other parents if your child throws a public tantrum, but remember: All parents deal with tantrums and most likely, they'll sympathize with you. If you are consistent with discipline, you will see these occurrences lessen as the child learns that you mean what you say.

•4
Stand your ground when tested by your child. Children will test the boundaries to see if you will walk the talk. When misbehavior happens, give the child one warning to stop the behavior and tell her what consequences will quickly ensue if it's not stopped immediately. Do this by remaining calm and kneel down to your child's level. Speak in a calm, but firm, tone and explain why the behavior is inappropriate. If the behavior continues, follow through with the consequences.

•5
Give the child something to do while you are shopping. This will help with distractions, like the candy and toy aisles. Draw pictures of fruit or vegetables and ask the child to help you look for those items in the store. Give her one of the hand baskets and let her help carry some items. When the shopping trip is over, praise her for her good behavior. Let her know how proud you are of her for doing so well.



Read more: How to Discipline a Child in Public | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_6933257_discipli...

Hmm I don't agree with all of these. Is it realistic to put a child in time out at the grocery store?
I like the distraction, I do that all of the time. But a time out????

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Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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I don't ask I tell! I'm like I'M GOING GROCERY SHOPPING.,.. YOU WANT ANYTHING BYE and leave Logan at home with him.

JuLeah - posted on 11/28/2010

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I think the main rules is, don't do anything in the home you would not do in public.

Time out in a grocery store ... nah, that's dumb. My daughter, when a toddler wanted to walk and not ride. If she ran off, she was put in the cart for a few minutes and then allowed to 'try again'. But, that is as close as I came to a time out.
I agree, give them something to do. It is a teaching moment really. Have them read labels and compare prices if old enough. Have them hold things, set things in the cart or point to which orange they want if they are litttle.
My daughter likes to keep track of our spending with my cell phone. She adds the total each time something goes in the basket and is even getting to the point that she understands tax (the numbers not the why) - Also, we shop at Trader Joes. Each week they place a stuffed horse in a new location. Kids who spot it while shopping get a lolly in the check out line.

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[deleted account]

Hmmm...This made me revise my strategy. Yay for remembering we'd have to have a car to get there!

I don't think I'd let my Julie out of the cart at any time, though, if she ever HAD to go to the store with me. I hate shopping anyway so it's usually either send Hubby out to get whatever we need or go with him and get it done as quickly as possible. When Julie gets here, I'm going to try my best to make sure I don't have to take her to the store because I don't want to be at the store myself so...yeah...

But if I do have to take her sometime, she stays in the cart at all times. If she cries for some toy or candy, I'll ignore it and tell her she can play with her toys or get something to eat when we get home.

Hmmm...She probably won't get out of the cart until she's too big for it...I don't know. I hate shopping...

Becky - posted on 11/28/2010

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I would feel weird giving my kids a time out in the store, I think. Because they're still little, Zach stays in the cart or stroller anyway, and if Cole is acting up, then he goes in too. That's his time-out.
I try not to go shopping at nap or meal-times, although it seems to happen often anyway. If I know we're going to be out for awhile, I bring drinks and snacks and if I remember, a couple of toys. I should start letting Cole help me choose stuff in the grocery store, that's a good idea.

Kerry - posted on 11/28/2010

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I make the most of when my oldest is at kindy so I only have one set of tantrums to deal with. He's 2 1/2 and I still use the stroller to keep him contained and save my sanity!

Most people are understanding when the kids misbehave in the shop...except for the older women (sorry, just my experience :-/ ) i think they forget what it was like having the wee ones or maybe shops weren't as overstimulating when their kids were little?

Katherine - posted on 11/28/2010

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Let me tell you taking a screaming newborn and 3.5yo out in the pouring rain was no picnic. I had asked good ole' hubby to watch them and I can't remember why but he gave me shit.



So me being the stubborn ass that I am, took them both. I think it was 3 weeks after my 2nd. Anyways she screamed bloody murder the entire time, I was almost in tears, people were looking at me with pity. My older thank GOD was being good. It was a nightmare.





Sorry don't know where that came from.....

[deleted account]

Must be nice to get to shop alone.... My son is always in the cart and the girls are old enough to behave.... or be ignored. ;) When they were little... we did time outs in the store a couple of times.

[deleted account]

I usually wait until my hubby has time off work to shop. It's the only time i really get out of the house. It's our family time out because we can't afford to take the kids to do anything else. Sad i know.
But because my hubby is with me we take 2 carts one for the kids and one for the shopping. If the kids muck up they get put in it for time out. Soemtimes the time out is even as much as just making them hold onto the cart. They hate it so it works for us.

[deleted account]

I've done time outs in the grocery store several times. I don't care what it looks like to anyone else. I'll sit him down on the floor right there where we are (as long as we're out of the way of other customers) and make him sit there for a minute.

Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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I take pleasure in leaving my kid at home while I grocery shop. It should be the done thing. I hate shopping with Logan I can't concentrate and just end up buying shit and forget things I really need.

Eliz - posted on 11/28/2010

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those car carts keep my son entertained but not all stores have them so i let him hold things i put in the cart.

[deleted account]

I recently told my son that he was going to stand next to the bananas for a time-out becasue of his insistent whining that he NEEDS to get something from those quarter vending machines. Trust me, we do set those expectations that we are not buying anything from those machines, but it hasn't quite sunk in yet.

Rosie - posted on 11/28/2010

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i've done it, lol! i felt like an ass, but i threatened it so i had to do it. it worked. i din't want to leave the store like everyone always says to do. i have limited time, and leaving isn't going to work for me. i can't come back at a different time. so, i take care of the problem and continue.

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