Does Bisexuality Exist?

Mrs. - posted on 12/03/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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This is always a divisive topics among my gay friends and I. Hell, my own mother has an opinion about it that differs from mine.

Here's Dan Savage's take on it which pretty much covers what most of my gay friends think:



I agree with a lot of what Dan says too, especially about bis drifting from the community. Still, I'm a bit more of a Kinsey scale thinker myself (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scal...) although it's a bit outdated.

So what up ladies, do you think bisexuality is the sexual identity equivalent of a unicorn or do you know/love you the bisexuals?

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Petra - posted on 12/04/2010

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The more accepting our society becomes of homosexuals and open sexuality, the more you see that it isn't just a black and white issue. I've known a lot of people who didn't fit nicely into the gay or straight categories, as well as others who are 100% one or the other. Sexuality can change over time, you shift a little left or right along the spectrum - I think people need to bear in mind that love is about the individual, not necessarily gender. People who don't fit into either category are not simply confused or deviant, they just have the capacity to love regardless of gender. I don't see anything wrong with it, and I've felt really bad for the people I've seen struggle with not being either or.

Krista - posted on 12/04/2010

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I also think the Kinsey scale comes closest to the situation. I'm not attracted to men and women equally, but there have been women in the past who have definitely attracted me (and one with whom I actually had sex). For the most part, though, it's men who catch my fancy. I know other women who are 100% hetero, and would never, ever, ever even want to kiss another woman.

Basically, I hate that people get compartmentalized. We like who we like and we love who we love, and I don't see why we have to slap labels on it.

Jenny - posted on 12/03/2010

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I am bisexual. It just means I can be equally attracted to a male or female. It still comes down to the individual though.

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I think many people can look at the same sex and be attracted to them and find them physically pleasing, although not necessarily feel they are bi-sexual. Bi-sexuality does exist and anyone who says it doesn't are very naive and possibly misguided. As humans we are built to love and form bonds with people around us, if people truely examined this love they would see that we fall in love with people not gender. Yes there are people who can only see people who are the opposite sex as potential lovers and likewise others who only view people of the same sex as lovers, but most of us have the potential to have lovers of either gender due to this loving people aspect of human nature.

Rosie - posted on 12/04/2010

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i'm more of a kinsey scale thinker myself. i do identify as bisexual because i am, and always have been, highly attracted physically to women. i know i don't fit the perfect little spectrum of whatever scale bisexuals are put on. i've never had sex with a woman, i have made out and fondled a woman when i was younger and kissed a few women, but no sex. i am very visual, so when i am looking at porn i want to see lesbian porn, or threesomes happening. i do however like the security that being with a man gives me. i feel safer, i like the idea of babies and marriage and such. i guess i never actually chose to be with a man either, that just came to me naturally as well. IDK. it's very complicated for me. all i know is that bisexuality isn't a phase or whatever. there's just different degrees of it.

Stifler's - posted on 12/03/2010

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They say it isn't real but I think it is. You can be attracted to both sexes.

Mrs. - posted on 12/03/2010

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I didn't mean to out the board bisexuals, I just love hearing people's thoughts on the matter. Both my fiance and I would probably be what some people call bisexual. So, I know in my heart they exist because I can't remember a time that wasn't my reality. Still, I know there are many in both communities (gay and straight) who disagree. I think because it has been used against them to prove it's a choice. Usually by people, who I believe most likely could make that choice easily themselves if they did a little looking in the mirror ;)

Jodi - posted on 12/03/2010

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I'm bisexual, I'm married to a man because it was important to me (at that time) that I had a "traditional" family, husband, wife, kids, that idea...and because, despite having flirted around in various female/female relationships, I fell in love with who is now my husband. That was 7 years ago, I'm still attracted to women as well as men and in the event of a divorce, could easily see myself in a lesbian relationship.



*edit to add: I do agree with what he says though, that for many people, it is just a phase of curiosity or a transition of sorts into completely accepting your own homosexuality. But for others, like me, yes, bisexuality does exist.

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