Extending the Olive Branch

Kimberly - posted on 10/22/2010 ( 26 moms have responded )

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A few weeks ago I used a pet name to refer to Christina in a post. This angered her and resulted in a verbally abusive email exchange. I got over it- I thought. Then yesterday when she called me out for something she didn't think was funny, I shot back with an insult. I felt bad about it later and deleted the post and I felt even worse about it when another poster noted that Christina "cops a lot of beatings in this group" and commended her for sticking around to take it. She does and she even left the group for a while. I don't know if it had anything to do with the "beatings", I sure hope not. I don't want to be bullied, I don't want to be a bully and I don't want anyone else to feel bullied. So to stop a potential cycle. I would like to retract my mean statement from last night, Christina. I didn't mean it. Even if I was joking, it was not nice and I admit it. I'd like to start off with a clean slate.

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Dana - posted on 10/22/2010

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Thank you. I think it's something for us all to keep in mind, we never really know what's going on with the person behind the screen.

C. - posted on 10/22/2010

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Wow, Kimberly! That was very nice of you. I accept your apology. And I would also like to apologize for the PMs. I have been through a trying time this last year- both mentally and physically, but I am starting to realize (again) when it is time to step away. And I should have just stepped away before I PMed you. I'm sorry.

And since this is about PMs.. There was also a time when I PMed Dana S. I don't remember what it was about at all, but I am sorry to you, too. It should never have happened.

I told you ladies.. I still have a lot of growing up to do. Please bear with me and I will try to do the same.

Jodi - posted on 10/22/2010

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I think the thing about this debate board is that you need to let go from one debate to another. Once a debate has been closed, it is often closed for a very good reason, and you really should put yourself in a frame of mind where you can step back from it and not feel the need to be PMing backwards and forwards to continue the debate.



Quite honestly, I have had people PM me after a debate has finished and I have no interest in carrying it on, and I just hit the delete button. Even if it is a topic I feel strongly about, I will NEVER continue a debate by PM.



Just consider it lesson learned. Every topic in this community should be a new slate as far as I'm concerned.

C. - posted on 10/22/2010

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That is very true, Dana. I think this will definitely serve as a reminder to me to not fly off the handle b/c the other person may very well be going through as much of a hard time as I am, if not worse. Thanks for that :)

Tah - posted on 10/22/2010

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Well i am queen of tit for tat and if you give it to me x 10 i will give it back x 20,ask my husband, he said he would be scared to even look at somebody else because i would probably marry another guy just to get even..lol... so i understand it's hard to not be defensive if you feel attacked, it's instinct, i don't know what the deal was, i was sleeping for work then at work...lol..but i commend you for extending the olive branch......i also never forget...so it makes it hard to fogive sometimes, but as long as you can recognize the issue, it can be fixed....

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Desiree - posted on 10/23/2010

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Kimberly that very big of you, I don't know what was said. You should be proud of yourself!>

Tah - posted on 10/23/2010

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well this post is gonna send me to the dentist...too sweet....bunch of softees...

Iris - posted on 10/23/2010

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Krista, I like your song much better here than: "Another one bites the dust!!" ;)
Luv you guys.... just behave!!

Krista - posted on 10/23/2010

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It wasn't anybody with an ear for music, I can tell you that right now.

Krista - posted on 10/23/2010

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Caaaannn you feeeeel the luuuuuurrrrrve toniiiiiiight....?

/sings loudly and off-key

Charlie - posted on 10/23/2010

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Yeah , yeah hugs and shit LOL.

I kid ! loves to all my DM Ladies ♥

C. - posted on 10/22/2010

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Dang it! All these nice posts + my crazy hormones.. I'm starting to get misty-eyed..

C. - posted on 10/22/2010

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Aww, Dana! I'm so sorry about your miscarriage! I had no idea you were going through that.

Dana - posted on 10/22/2010

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Thanks Christina, that is nice. I think no matter what age any of us are or will be, we will always have growing to do. None of us are perfect. It's also hard to keep tempers in control when things are shitty. I've noticed that since my miscarriage, 4 months ago, I can be bitchy as hell and mad at the world sometimes.

Dana - posted on 10/22/2010

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Ah yes, I just block them. lol I didn't realize that in the OP it said there was a email going back and forth...I stop it as soon as I get it. I don't even bother reading it.

Kimberly - posted on 10/22/2010

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It is VERY hard but that only sinks me to a spot that I don't want to be in. Especially when we are all trying to lead by example. What does it say if I can't stop the tit for tatting and cutting remarks? It spreads like wild fire quickly. I recognize the bullying and there is too much of it in the world today without perpetuating it here. I could easily ignore it but chose the wrong way of dealing with it, but I caught it and want to make a difference. That's all I got.

Dana - posted on 10/22/2010

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I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, I know from personal experience that it is hard to keep a snarky attitude out of threads when a person is sending you a barrage of rude PM's privately.

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