Father daughter dances banned by school district


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Janice - posted on 09/21/2012




I totally get why some people would cherish these events and be very upset that they will no longer occur but sadly they are just not appropriate in today's society in which families have changed so much. Not only do some children not have an involved father or mother but they instead may have two father's or two mother's. By continuing such events so many children are left out and that's really sad. At the end of the article it said that parent/child events would still be allowed just not those specifying gender and I think that is the best route.

[deleted account]

it should be parent/child dances and such. of course, either way i would have never been able to go cuz i don't have a dad and my mom's a shit so yeah...

Tracey - posted on 09/21/2012




So call it parent/carer/responsible adult & child dances or baseball games and everyone can go. Social events are good for building school and family relationships, would be a shame to stop them.

Mary - posted on 09/20/2012




I'm actually a little bit torn on this one.

On the one hand, I remember how much I adored these father/daughter events when I was growing up. I come from you stereotypical "traditional" family, and although my dad was very involved and present in my life (he was my basketball coach all through grade school), there was something just so special about getting dressed up for that corny school dance with my dad, and leaving my mom at home. (Now that I'm a mom, I realize she was probably doing a happy dance the second that door closed behind us!).

However, when I think about some of my friends who didn't get to attend that, it does make me feel sort of sad for them, and wonder about how they must have felt to be excluded from that event. For one of those friends, it was because her father was killed in a car accident when we were in seventh grade. For another, it was because her father was an alcoholic shit, and she had learned early in life that having him attend any school function (particularly without her mom to run interference) would be a painful and humiliating event. For another friend, it was because her dad did a runner with his secretary, and moved out-of-state. Another shit, whose only involvement in the life of his 3 kids was to pay child support. She's 40 now, and hasn't seen him since she was 13.

As lovely as this tradition is, and as fond as my own memories are of these events, I can't help but feel a little guilty when I think back to how hard this must have been for them. It's not just the one night, either. It's the conversations at the lunch table in the school leading up to it, and those the week after discussing what so-and-so wore, or how someone's dad amazed us all with his moon-walking skills (it was the 80's!), or the sharing of pictures, or that page in the yearbook dedicated to this event. WHen I think about that, and the reality of the unintentional hurtful consequence of specific mother/son or father/daughter (or even mother/daughter and father/son) events can have on those who don't have that particular parent figure in their life....I sort of lean towards doing away with them.

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