female breadwinner...signing more divorce papers...

Tah - posted on 09/10/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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http://www.aolnews.com/surge-desk/articl...



Why do we think that is?.....is it because she doesn't have to worry about money and moving back in with mom and dad with the kids if she leaves? We are military and i can't tell you how many wives i know and am friends with who deal with the issues in their marriage because they are SAHM's or they work but for pennies. They just take their anti-depressants wash them down with some wine (no, im not kidding) and deal with it. Now a few of the moms i know have good jobs and were the ones who initiated the seperations and divorce...



I can def. see this being the case..

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I would guess that the reason for trouble in many marriages is because of some men expect their earning wives to still do the majority of the work in the home. Obviously women who earn close or more than their husbands have to deal with similar hours and stress in the workplace before they come home and have to do everything else. I know women in this situation and I think their husbands are very selfish. I can understand why this could lead to a build up of resentment. It's understandable that women who don't financially rely on their husbands and still do all the housework might start to ask "whats the point of being married?" I mean they're already doing everyhting that a single mother would have to do so it's understandable that they dont see the point of being married. I'm not saying that I agree with divorce, but I can understand how they feel and I'm annoyed on their behalf.

Tah - posted on 09/11/2010

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I am and have always been a advocate of women being independent and self-sufficient. It bugs me to no end when a woman with children or without is so dependent on her husband that even if she is miserable due to abuse, cheating..whatever...she feels she has to stay. I dont see anything wrong with being a sahm or housewife, but i always encourage the friends and neighbors i have to do take some onine courses or to keep current in their field (if they have one) in case they need to make a speedy get-a-way...my parents have been married over 40 years and my mother could always depend on my dad but she raised us to also be independent....she was just telling me on the phone that she is so proud of her girls being independent and having careers and being able to take care of themselves because 2 of my sisters had to send wake-up calls to their husbands by moving out because they were being @$$holes...and one of my B-I-L's is still in class....

Jodi - posted on 09/10/2010

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Well, yeah, I can see the point. In my first marriage, I was main income earner. I earned about 50% more than my ex. I was absolutely terrified of being on my own and being a single mother, worried about how I would cope, both emotionally anbd financially, because I knew I'd never get any help from my ex (and I never have, so I was right about that). Our marriage was a mess, he wasn't willing to go to counselling, I put up with it for a long time, but it was the fact that I had a reasonable income and could afford to support my son on my own that helped me with being able to make the decision to move on. I think eventually I would have made that decision anyway, but finances to factor into these decisions sometimes, and having a decent income meant that I was able to buy my own house and move on without wondering where the next meal would come from.

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