Jerks, the lovable vs the deplorable

Nicole - posted on 01/23/2011 ( 10 moms have responded )

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What makes a jerk acceptable/lovable vs. deplorable/obnoxious?



I really enjoyed watching episodes of House but he was a complete jerk! He was a lovable jerk IMO.



Some jerks just get under my skin.



I can’t figure out what is it that is different between obnoxious jerks and likable jerks.



Is it that at least House is good at something and does some good for the people who come to see him? Does a jerk become obnoxious is they are good at nothing/useless?



Is it a matter of physical attractiveness? Are we more likely to like a sexy jerk?



Or is it a matter of fondness by proximity? We don’t have to deal with House’s bs on a daily basis, so it’s forgivable whereas we have to deal with the sarcastic, obnoxious jerks in our lives and actually interact with them, so they suck?



As for what this is inspired by, I think it should be obvious...watching House. Duh!

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Stifler's - posted on 01/23/2011

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What makes the difference? If what they say is true or not! House always says the truth basically, bluntly in a funny way and comes off like a jerk but it's for the patient's own good. Non lovable jerks just say mean things to hurt you.

Krista - posted on 01/23/2011

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Dorothy Parker was a delightful jerk.

I think (and this is just me talking out of my ass, here), is that a tolerable jerk tends to just hate dancing around words, and prefers being blunt and direct. There isn't real malice there, nor does the lovable jerk operate solely out of self-interest.

The obnoxious jerk tends to operate with two goals: 1. hurt other people, and 2. make himself look better.

LaCi - posted on 01/23/2011

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I think it depends on humor. A jerk is lovable if they make you laugh. A jerk is obnoxious if they aren't funny-and even more so if they aren't at all funny but really, really think they are.

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Meghan - posted on 01/23/2011

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I know a few people who act like "jerks" in public but once you get to know them on a personal level you realize it is some sort of defense. Someone who is constantly obnoxious, rude and pretentious is too much for me-doesn't matter how hot they are.

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loureen Jerkiness is a word if you want it to be:D awesome thing about the english language, you get enough people saying something, it becomes a word.

Nicole - posted on 01/23/2011

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I also wonder how much of it is that a jerk is more likable if they say what other people want to say.

A plain unlikable jerk just foams at the mouth

Nicole - posted on 01/23/2011

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That reminds me of a Dorothy Parker quote:

“Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.”



I totally agree, a jerk is more pleasant to be around if they make me laugh, even if I am laughing at myself, and the intent is a big aspect of their likability

Katherine - posted on 01/23/2011

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I think it's the personality. House has that jerky personality, but it's filled with sharp wit and sarcasm. I think real jerks just are mean and have nothing behind what they say. If that makes sense.

Charlie - posted on 01/23/2011

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I think it is in the intent behind the Jerkiness ( is that a word ? ) some people are fun loving jerks and some are just mean .

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