Nicole - posted on 12/28/2010 ( 14 moms have responded )




Are mom’s groups dangerous places for moms?

I remember reading once that people were getting concerned that a parenting group started on facebook was started by pedophiles. I remember how concerned people got about it.

Then I see on COM men joining who do not have children, one of which was involved in the adult baby lifestyle. How do you feel about that?

When I first read about dads joining circle of moms, I felt fine with it. I hoped they would come and they would stay. But men without kids? Men with baby related fetishes and mental illnesses?

Is it all harmless?

What kind of security do mom’s groups need to ensure the safety of their members?


Jodi - posted on 12/28/2010




Actually, men aren't permitted on CoM. If you find one, you should report the profile to the CoM offices. They will remove the profile and block the IP address.

Jenn - posted on 12/29/2010




There is no danger unless you are totally clueless and go to meet someone all alone who you know nothing about.

[deleted account]

I guess a lot of my response depends on what you mean by "mom's groups." This is the only parenting forum I post to, but I am a member of a couple of mommy groups in real life. I never post my son's information to public forums. I did have a picture, but after a brief cyber stalking situation, I will no longer post with my last name or any images. I know some people here do not take people without full names and images seriously, but I will not post them anymore.
The mommy groups I am a member of in real life require that new members meet the admin and at least 4 other members in a public place 3 times before allowing access to the group website (where we post events and such), and they are not allowed to attend meetups held in a person's home until they have met the hostess. I feel pretty safe in those groups, but I still don't have my son's info posted on the group site.

Tara - posted on 12/28/2010




where on com have you seen men joining who don't have children? And how do you know that one of them was involved in the "adult baby lifestyle"?
I'm just curious how you know this information.
I am careful about what I post, there are no pictures of my kids on com and I don't accept friend requests on facebook from com people, cause I don't know them irl. I don't have any facebook friends who I have not met in person and know.
Again, its about your idea of privacy and what you put out on the internet. There is no fool proof way to keep people from impersonating someone else for their own sick gains, all we can do is report them as we find them and be careful about your online activities.\


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Becky - posted on 12/28/2010




I didn't see anything in that link you posted... it was talking about epilepsy and learning disorders.
There are always dangers to revealing too much information online. I don't think mommy groups are any more dangerous than any other online group or social networking site. Some people post ridiculous amounts of information about themselves on Facebook, and that is just dumb. Even if your profile is set to the highest privacy setting, it could still be hacked.
Both of my online mommy groups are private, new members have to be approved by admins. I feel safe on them and do post pics of my boys. But on the public boards that I was on before we went private, I did not post pics. And I wouldn't ever give out my address or phone number to someone I didn't fully trust.

Nicole - posted on 12/28/2010




it was a hoax but the panic about it was real...
what I am asking is how much is harmless and what are the real dangers with online parenting groups?

Sherri - posted on 12/28/2010




The whole facebook thing you mentioned is a hoax you can verify it through snopes.

I do not worry about such things.

Stifler's - posted on 12/28/2010




this is the only one i use too. in real life i have 2 mothers groups - one started by the baby clinic that we've just carried on meeting and one started by friends and i've met some other people that they were friends with. i think i've seen one or 2 men on here ages ago and it didn't bother me. there are women trolls too and people who make up stuff about their alleged kids and lives for attention and post child porn to facebook tribute groups.

Bonnie - posted on 12/28/2010




I didn't think that there were any men on here, so i'm glad Jodi A. mentioned that.

[deleted account]

I've been on plenty of public and private message boards. On the public ones, I've come across trolls and some of them mentally unstable too. Many women who faked pregnancies, faked babies/families, illnesses all for attention. But to my knowledge, they were all women. I do believe Dads should have a forum of their own but I don't know how many men will actually participate. As far as the adult baby fetish, well those types of people will never go away. Just keep on reporting them! After all, this is a public forum and anyone can read what you're writing. Be cautious and suspicious.

Stifler's - posted on 12/28/2010




I'm not that concerned to be perfectly honest. I don't have that many pics of my kid online and none of them are of him naked.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 12/28/2010




It is a bit scary because you can become anyone behind the computer screen, I cant think of a full proof way that you can make a group safe, except that your careful about what you reveal and that you keep your profile private……and when you make a group you mark it as invite only…..and even after all that “Precaution” the chances of some wack job infiltrating and perpetrating is still possible…

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