Middle School Given Sex Survey

Katherine - posted on 06/19/2011 ( 17 moms have responded )




Long story short a school in MA made 12yo's take a sex survey that included oral sex, BC, pulling out etc....... The survey was for federal grant money. It was required for the school to receive the money.
NOW, I have never heard something so damn crazy in my life! They could have refused and if they with held the money they could have done other things to get the money. In fact they could have called the press. Another thing is that the parents were never informed of this survey.

As a parent I would be LIVID, and most were obviously. Many called attorneys.

What do you think about this?


Lady Heather - posted on 06/19/2011




A voluntary survey with permission from parents would make more sense, but I guess the government doesn't figure they'd get accurate info that way, or at least not proper representation of the general population. Still does not seem the right way to go collecting info.

I think all of this stuff is very important to discuss with kids, but I don't feel anyone should HAVE to answer questions of this nature ever. I participated in lots of studies like this while at university with quite personal surveys and such and I always had to sign off saying I was okay with answering the questions first. If at any point I said I wanted to back out, I was free to do so. If I was given that kind of consideration as an adult, surely we can treat our kids with a little more respect.

For the record though, I sure as hell knew what all that stuff was when I was 12. I wasn't one of the kids doing it, but kids talk and I knew. Would I have let my mum and dad know that I knew what withdrawal and bjs were? Umm...no. But I'm going to guess that most 12 and 13 year olds are even more familiar with these things than we were.

JuLeah - posted on 06/19/2011




Well, my first thought is ... FOX news, so check the source. Did this even happen? And, did it actually happen as they reported ... so be right back ... hang on while I check this out... okay, I am finding only FOX news reporting this, and others quoting FOX news .... will check into this more and get back to you

Constance - posted on 06/19/2011




I don't agree with it but I understand why they did it the way they did it. They needed complete disclosure from the kids abou their sexual experiences. The only thing that the kids answered was age and gender no names. If they were required to fil out their name then they would not have been truthful.
I hate to think that this has to be done but it is a fact that sex is prodominate in middle schools. The funding is provided based on the risk factors of STDs and pregnacy. Our kids don't even need our promission to go and get birth control for a doctor and we can't even get that information without our child's permission.

I don't like it but unfortunately it is a fact that most middle school kids know what everyting is. When we hear storys about girls making a pact to all get pregnant or 300 + kids in middle sized school all having the same STD. The CDC wants to prevent and not ignore what is going on.

I strongly believe that sex should be taught at home. Full disclosure about sex and ntot just it is something a married couple do, so don't do it and think that is going to prevent anything. Educate, communicate, and listen without judgement. If we are going to make a difference in our children then this is what we need to do.
The other night when I was watching TLC. A banner ran across saying special Dugger announcement. I was a little curious about it because I knew the second grandbaby was due but I wasn't sure when. Well some how I came acrossed Josh and Anna Dugger's website. I read about how they met and everything it is sweet and romantic. But what did surprise me about both of their families. Yes they were raised not to give into their urges they gave them support to get through the tough times They were able to speak freely to both mother and father no shame was ever included. I wasn't a dirty thing just waiting to share your life wit someone else thing. I thought that was wonderful.

Jenni - posted on 06/19/2011




Well, I do understand the purpose of the survey. There were 7th and 8th graders when I was in school that were having sex and oral sex. The CDC conducted it, I imagine they'd get useful information from it. They teach sex ed in middle school and it's not as though 7th and 8th graders don't already know about sex, oral sex, protection.

BUT the part I don't agree with at all is not asking parental permission to conduct the survey.


View replies by

Amber - posted on 06/19/2011




The parents should have had to give consent or had the choice to opt out.
I don't believe in hiding information about sex from kids, especially pre-teens. I plan on answering any questions that I'm asked. I don't even mind the school giving comprehensive sex ed classes; in fact, I encourage it. Schools shouldn't be going behind parents' backs to do this though.


This article says they asked if they had practiced fellatio. I knew what a bj was in middle school, but I couldn't have told you what fellatio was :) lol
I wonder how skewed the results will be due to wording and confusion alone.

Sherri - posted on 06/19/2011




I would have been okay with the survey if parents had been informed and could opt to let their child participate or not.

[deleted account]

Katherine - the video is from Fox News... So it's not a Huffington Post story, they're just linking the video from Fox...

[deleted account]

Good point, JuLeah... I'd like to see a story done by another news source as well, but that doesn't change the bare facts of the issue...

[deleted account]

I'm wondering why premission forms weren't sent home. I distinctly remember having to get parental permission to do a sex-ed class in 7th grade, so I am really not understanding why such a graphic survey wouldn't require the same parental permission...

I also want to know WHO wrote the survey - the school or the government people who "forced" the school to give it to the kids?

Also, WHAT KIND OF GRANT ARE THEY TRYING TO GET?? Seriously, what the heck kind of grant would require a graphic sexual survey of 12 year-olds?

I'm just baffled about the whole thing...

Teresa - posted on 06/19/2011




WAY WAY over the line and another reason my kids don't go to public schools. The hoops they have to jump through to get grant/public money are ridiculous and perverse.

Jenni - posted on 06/19/2011




Sorry, haha I meant principle. It's probably true. He probably couldn't do much about it. He was too busy counting out all the bills in his money house and calling up the contractors to have the new jaccuzzi put in the teacher's lounge.

Katherine - posted on 06/19/2011




Yep the principal claimed he had his "Hands tied."
All for a grant they could have been facilitated more effectively.
The parents had NO say. NONE. And the poor kids. I mean they probably didn't even know what half of it meant!!!!

Jenni - posted on 06/19/2011




So it was part of the school contract to receive a grant? That the government could come in and question students on whatever they felt like?

Ummm don't the parents have any say in this AT ALL?

You're right, I would be livid. Think i'd seriously start considering homeschool. I think it's the principal that gets me the most.

Imagine if schools received funding from corporations. I'd really start getting my knickers in knots if they started forcing my kids to conduct surveys on which apple product they preferred or which brand of tampon they used.

Katherine - posted on 06/19/2011




Here is the interesting blog from cafemom too:

Some Massachusetts parents are upset after learning that their adolescent children participated in an in-class survey that asked a series of explicit questions regarding sex, drugs, and rock and roll.

Ok, not really that last one.

One of the questions was “What method of birth control do you use?” with withdrawal listed as one of the options. What twelve-year-old even knows what withdrawal means, let alone how to use it as (ineffective) birth control? Other questions on the survey probed kids on the frequency of their sexual activity, the kinds of drugs they’d experimented with, and whether or not they ever had suicidal thoughts.

If one of the students wrote, “Well I didn’t before I was forced to fill out this embarrassing questionnaire,” in answer to the suicide question, I will buy him or her ice cream for a year. Because that’s what kids should be doing – eating ice cream, climbing trees, complaining about homework, and nervously giggling in the presence of the opposite sex. Not filling out sex surveys.

School officials say they had no choice as to whether or not to administer the survey, as it was tied to a federal grant.

Principal Fran Thomas told Fox News Radio that students were indeed given the survey – and admits it was graphic. But Thomas said the school has nothing to do with the content and they were required to administer the survey to fulfill a grant requirement.

“I can take no responsibility for what’s on that survey,” Thomas said. “It’s not generated by the school system.”

Thomas said the survey was funded by a federal grant and administered by LUK Inc., a local social services agency -- in coordination with the Centers for Disease Control.

Baloney. The government made me do it is the lamest excuse ever. To quote moms everywhere: If the government told you to jump off a cliff, would you do it? The principal could have told the LUK Inc. no, and if the grant money was withheld, the local news team could have been alled in faster than you can say STD prevention.

As parents, we count on our schools to keep an eye out for our kids while they are there. That includes protecting them from graphic material that isn’t appropriate for their age group. It also includes looking for signs that a student may be experimenting with sex or drugs, and scheduling a meeting with the kid’s parents to determine if they’ve noticed a change in behavior as well.

Parents and teachers need to work in better harmony to create the best learning environment for our children. One that doesn’t include asking middle-schoolers how often they engage in oral sex.

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