My daughter is choosing side of my ex

Nathalie - posted on 02/17/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )

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She see him doing no wrong !! And only when I ask her to tell her father something , she says don't put me in between, father and I have no communication. But she has no problem with dating messages from him

4 Comments

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Jackie - posted on 09/06/2014

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Do not EVER put your child in between the two of you. Thats mean and she deserves better. You are literally forcing her to choose sides. Get a mediator, a lawyer, anything…just leave her out of it.

Danicia - posted on 02/20/2014

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don't put your daughter in the middle. she didn't have sex with her dad and have a child with him so she shouldn't be held responsible for communicating in efforts to coparent with him. that is YOUR responsibility. solely yours and his responsibility- she is the child you two are the parents, keep her out of it. it's common for girls to pick "dad's side" at some time or another b/c they want the daddy/daughter relationship deal. the best thing you can do is not bad talk her father, if at all possible just don't talk about him. anything negative you say about him will fuel her fire to push away from you. I did the same thing to my mother (divorced parents) and the more negative things I heard said about my father the more I rebelled against her.
don't use your daughter as a form of communication with your ex and don't say anything negative about him, say nothing at all if easier.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/19/2014

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Um, if your daughter is choosing to reside with her father, and she's of an age where the courts will allow her to do so, then you really need to let that be.

And, she's absolutely correct, you DO NOT use her as a go-between with messages to your ex. You are an adult, he is an adult. Handle it in an adult manner. Either that, or handle it with messages through your attorneys.

VERY poor form to try to use your child that way.

Desiree - posted on 02/19/2014

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Being a child from a divorced family is a very difficult thing. i don't know how old she is but maybe you need to set aside a day that is purely for the two of you alone and try to get her to talk to you. Children always play one parent off on the other. And somehow she is blaming you for the split, it would be really interesting to know what he has told the child.

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