Naming your baby...

Sara - posted on 05/30/2011 ( 37 moms have responded )

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Do you think women should get more say in what the baby's name will be because she was the one who did most of the "work" (carrying the baby, giving birth, etc) or do you think the man should have equal say?

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Tara - posted on 05/30/2011

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Hmmm... I don't know I think it should be a joint effort. I couldn't just say "You go ahead and name the baby" nor could I say "I carried this baby I am going to name it"
So I think both parents should have equal say in what the child is named. And if they can't find some middle ground than I think it should be narrowed down to the names each parent prefers, tossed into a hat and picked randomly. That way neither parent "gets" to have the right to name the child, each parent has the same chance of their preferred name being picked. But ideally both parents should agree on a name.

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Amber - posted on 05/31/2011

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It should definitely be a joint effort with each parent having veto power over names they absolutely hate.
We made lists and gave them to each other to cross out names that we didn't like. I ended up getting the name that I wanted though ;) lol We both liked it.

I used to tease Chad when he'd come up with something I really didn't like (Ummm..Constantine anybody?) and tell him that I was glad that I had to be the one to fill out the birth certificate. We aren't married, which means that I am the one who fills out the certificate. I had to give the hospital permission to let him sign it.
We should be married before we have another (unless bc majorly fails me this year), so I won't have that to hold over his head...Damn :)

Amy - posted on 05/31/2011

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We both agreed on first names months before babies came out. Middle names....I could never decide and he always picks it the day after I have them so we can finish paperwork and go home. lol. I know this one's first name too. but still no middle name. I figure she hasn't been born yet, we'll figure it out! :)

Lesa - posted on 05/31/2011

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Both my husband and I picked a boy's name and a girl's name for our first as we didn't find out the sex. I vetoed his girls name as I am a teacher and heard it a lot and he vetoed my boy's name just because he didn't like it. So we had one boy name and one girl name. We ended up with a boy and his name is Nicholas Eric. For our second we found out the sex and it took us forever to find a girl's name. My husband hated every name that I loved. I kept throwing names at him and he kept saying I don't like it, until one day I said Naomi Dawn and he loved it as did I. A little traditional but different as well.

Laressa - posted on 05/31/2011

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My husband picked both of our children's names. I think he did a good job. Laurie Rochelle and Louis Jayden. I'm clued out when it comes to finding a good name among the millions of options. And he never stressed about a name either. A few weeks before baby was due he popped out a name...

Lucy - posted on 05/31/2011

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Well before our duaghter was born we had the 'what should we name our kids?' conversation and the name that came up that we both loved was Freya and so thats what our daughter was called when she was born several years later - it suits her too, blonde, blue eyes and drop dead gorgeous. As for our second child, I really wanted the name Valentine for a boy (it was my great grandad's name) but my hubby hated it and so we spent a long time trying to find a name we both agreed on until we came upon the name Zak. We liked the sound of Zack but I felt that it was a bit more adventurous to spell it Zak and it became our son's name when he was born last october. He really suits it and when you say it with my last name he sounds like a super hero :p
It was definately more fun to name our kids together and to find a name we both liked, I may have carried them but he helped make them and is is definately doing his fair share of raising them as well as supporting me while I was pregnant.

Ez - posted on 05/31/2011

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I think it should be a joint effort, and the father should get the right to veto anything he truly hates. But I think it's reasonable for the mother to have the final say.

Patricia - posted on 05/31/2011

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yes i definately do we are the ones that have to carry them and put up with all the things that go along with creating this precious life and the extreme pain of child birth some i was nice and let him help or pick part of the name but with the last 4 i said no way you don't do anything to help out so you dn't get a say

Nikki - posted on 05/31/2011

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Well for me, I am selfish when it comes to this area. I was my way or the high way. But my hubby only liked weird names like Scout for a girl. There was no way I was calling my daughter Scout. So in our relationship I get the last say. I know it's selfish and it should be a combined effort where both parties at least semi agree but when your on two completely different ends of the scale, what I says goes. Isobel's name has grown on him ;P

Sneaky - posted on 05/31/2011

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I would say equal, or SHOULD be equal, but for my first two I ended up giving him a list of my top three and he choose on the day. Both times I was surprised. At least I got to choose the middle names :o)

Stifler's - posted on 05/31/2011

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Equal say if they're raising the baby together! My husband let me pick our baby girl's name though and I thought of Logan's name and he liked them both.

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Joint decision i feel.Second baby it was still a joint decision but it had to be ran by the big sister too..lol..So together we agreed on a beautiful name which actually means "beautiful".

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It should be a joint decision and if an agreement can't be made.... someone should be willing to concede to the other's naming choice.... or just don't name the kid. ;)

We completely agreed on the girls names.

My son's middle name was supposed to be Christopher (actually decided while pregnant w/ the girls before we knew they were girls). While pregnant w/ him though... my ex threw a 'fit' and said his middle name was Kekoa. I was extremely upset (Christopher is my brother's name and both girls also have family in their names), but I had no respect or power in that relationship so I conceded. When I found out my ex was going to BE my ex.... I thought about going w/ the original middle name just to spite him, but by that time my son's middle name had become Kekoa and I just couldn't do it.

Mrs. - posted on 05/30/2011

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Depends, if the guys is a cock-knocker who is not expected to be around much...fuck 'em.

If he is generally a good partner and does well by you/baby...equal say.

We made a list of names that weren't some old awful classmate's or a dog's name he knew. At the hospital, he was so astounded by what had just happened, he let me pick. I made sure that I gave her three first names though...because that is the tradition in his family.

Kellie - posted on 05/30/2011

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I went through a baby name book, wrote out a list said pick one from here but if you don't like any you can go through the book. Ended up with him picking her first name and I picked her middle name. It was as easy as that. We had her named when I was about 6 or 8 weeks pregnant. Next baby I get to pick the first name and he the middle name.

Bridgette - posted on 05/30/2011

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I am all for agreeing on a name, though there need to be veto's available for really bad names!!

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It should be a compromise. Even if you go through 100 names before reaching one that both parents are "just okay" with...that's better than one parent hating a name.



Both our girls were almost named 'Holly'. I think it's a lovely name, but not my first choice. However, my husband had a dear cousin named Holly that was killed about 15 years ago. So I was going to let him have that name for that reason. When it came down to it though, he just couldn't go through with using the name.

Rosie - posted on 05/30/2011

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i'd say it's pretty equal, ALTHOUGH i did play that card with him a little bit, lol. with my puppy dog eyes, and moany achy voice, i reminded him who was doing all the work, and how all he did was bust a nut. it didn't work quite as well as i wanted, but i got him to compromise at least, lol.

Lady Heather - posted on 05/30/2011

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I think it should be mutual. We both have to go out in the world with the kid. It does rather piss me off that the guy gets the last name tagged on there for no reason though. I ended up giving in on this point because using the Swedish name gave me an opportunity to use more awesome first names, but I still stuck my last name in there too because I feel like if I'm going to be pregnant and squeeze a baby out of my vag, she's going to be a fucking Livingstone too.

Jenni - posted on 05/30/2011

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Equal. For both of our children we suggested baby names to each other until we arrived at a few we both agreed on. Then decided together what we would name our children.



With my SD. He suggested the name Kira to her BM and she loved it. He liked the name of a friend at work, Kiro and decided to feminize it. They chose Marie for her middle name because it is my husband's sister's name and her BM's sister's middle name. Kira has a combo last name of his and BM.



We both agreed on Benjamin for our son. We thought about Mason or Dawson for awhile. We gave him my husband's first name, Peter, for his middle name. Tradition. My husband's middle name is his father's name and so on. He took my husband's last name because, I love it and will eventually take it myself (we are not legally married yet).



I always liked the name Morgan. My husband liked my suggestion and we were undecided on a middle name until he thought up Jane. I loved it! So traditional but really uncommon nowadays and the names had a nice ring together. Again, she took my husband's last name.

Mel - posted on 05/30/2011

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NO I think they should be equal, both parents created that baby. We had trouble, we dont like any of the same names. I had to settle for names I liked but not my favourites

~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/30/2011

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Hell, I hated the middle name he chose for my son, but my husband loved it so I let him just have it.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/30/2011

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Yup. My husband was not crazy about my daughters name choice....but he totally let me have my way because of my difficult pregnancy. He told me straight up, I really don't want to name her that, but since you have had such a tough time, I think it should be your choice. He loves her name now.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 05/30/2011

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I think there should be lots of compromise when naming the baby IF the father will be present in the Childs life.

With my second born I wanted to give him a Korean name, but his father said Heck NO! he did not want his son to possible be made fun of. And so I pretty much had all the say as long as his name was NOT Korean

When we have a daughter my SO likes the name Anastasia and I don’t so much. I like the name Miyoung pronounced (Mee-Young) and its Korean so when we come to that Bump in the road a lot of compromise will have to be met…LOL

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For kicks & giggles, we did Baby Name Brackets, i nhonor of college basketball's "March Madness". My son was supposed to be born in the middle of the tournament! We changed our original intended name 3 weeks before he was born though.

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It takes 2 to make a baby, and I feel that it should be a mutually agreed upon name. I've heard of many couples that say "If it's a girl, the mom names it, if it's a boy, the guy names it". OK, fair enough because that was a mutually agreed upon decision. No, I truly do not believe that the woman has more baby-naming clout over her husband/partner. To me, I see it as a silly school-yard game. JMO though.

Krista - posted on 05/30/2011

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I'm with you, Sara. I think that it should be up to both parents, but with the Mom having the ability to decide if there's an impasse. But, the Dad should have veto if he absolutely HATES the name.

Merry - posted on 05/30/2011

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We always said if we couldn't agree we would each make a list of our personal top ten favorites, then trade lists and number which ones we like best to least. Then the list gets shortened to the top five that the other person liked. Then you have ten names that you can work with and try to pick one you both like.
Idk,haven't needed to do it yet, eric was picked four years before his birth, Fierna was picked when we found out we had conceived again. Brendan has been picked four years too, and we rethinking Anica if we get another girl next.... We tend to agree eventually, we just go through tons and tons of names til we agree.

Bonnie - posted on 05/30/2011

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I think it should be an agreeance, but with my husband and I we had an agreeance that I would pick the first name and he would pick the middle name, but we would still have to agree on the choices.

Sara - posted on 05/30/2011

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I agree with you, Tara. But I also think that if it comes to an impasse about which name to pick (if you have it narrowed down to a couple), then perhaps the woman should get the tie-breaking vote, just out of courtesy.

Tara - posted on 05/30/2011

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@Laura, lol
When I was pregnant with my oldest daughter my ex had a boy name picked out that I just couldn't go with: Wyatt Earp
Yes the Earp had to be included as a middle name. I was so glad she was a girl. I would have fought him on that name choice tooth and nail.

Isobel - posted on 05/30/2011

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WHOA...but I know a woman who wanted to name her daughter Briar Rose (not what I would have picked) and while she was asleep, her husband named her Sarah!

Isobel - posted on 05/30/2011

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considering that my ex wanted to name Quentin "James Tyberius Kirk"...yes.

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