Nature vs Nurture

Leah - posted on 11/13/2010 ( 21 moms have responded )

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So in this video link, 2 teenage girls needed money, for nothing in particular, they just needed money. One say's she needed it for gas and maybe to buy a new phone, the other says she just wanted it for whatever. So they see a 9 year old girl selling girl scout cookies, so they go up to her and steal the envelope with all the cookie money in it (about $150). During the interview after, the girls show no remorse about it. The only thing they regret is that they got charged for it. My question is, is this sort of callous behavior something that is taught by parents and peers or are some people just born like that?

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Tah - posted on 11/13/2010

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this is lack of nurture, to entitles little chickens who probably have never heard the word no and are used to getting whatever they want and they obvioulsy thik that the world revolves around them.."i wanted that money and it was mine"...are you serious....there should be charges for attitudes like theirs...uuugghhhh....sickening..my daughter is a girl scout and there would have been footage of me mopping the parking lot with them....

JuLeah - posted on 11/13/2010

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I think we raise our kids to feel entitled to take whatever they want. They are not asked to work for things they want, they are not asked to earn anything. If their ordered food is longer then 3 minutes, they pitch a fit.
I know kids who get a new coat because they lost the past three. The wash their ipod and get a new one for their birthday. The get a new $200 phone because the one they have (and don't pay for) is a year old.
Food and clothes just appear with no effort on their part. Ride and transportation are expected. It is assume by most teens I know that they will get a new car when they turn 16. We teach them that it is their right to have all of this.
They have no understanding of what working for money is all about, so it really has no value to them.
They have been taught from birth that they can have anything they want. I know a teen who needs two bedrooms and a storage space to house all of her 'stuff' Old clothes, toys .....
She has more shoes then she can count, but will scream that she needs shoes for the up coming dance .... and she will get them.
Empathy has to be taught. We are not born with an understanding of how others might feel. Compassion has to be taught, and we don't teach it very well.
People like this are not born, we make them, we create them.
I will bet almost anything that the parents will find a way out for these kids. They will hire an attoreny who will explain away the behavior with some lame excuse and twist fact to make this 'not their fault'
The parents will pay whatever fine is brought, but the girls a new phone so they feel better about the whole thing and forget it ever happened.
I believe the parents will back the girls in their opinion that the police were mean, the law is stupid .... whatever they are going to say so they don't have to be accountable. I have seen this, and see it all the time. I work in the court systems and nothing is ever anyones fault - ever

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Mrs. - posted on 11/13/2010

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You know what I see. Two girls who are a little too happy to be on camera any way possible.

In my opinion, it's about attention and the attention material things bring. I don't think these girls are sociopaths, although I've known a few in my time and there is nothing you could really do to nurture those folks into feeling anything but a void. Nope, these girls are your typical, my daddy never gave me any attention or too much attention in a bad way girls. These are the kind of girls who end up on the Bachelor, porn or on the pole.

I always say to my fiance, you better let our daughter know she is loved and of value to you cause you know what happens to little girls who aren't...clear heels, extensions and a sugar daddy they met at their exotic dancing job.

Lacye - posted on 11/13/2010

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All I have to say is, they better be proud they aren't my kids! I would beat the living shit out of them (not beat literally but you know what I mean) That is horrible! Let some bleach blond skank ho try that with my daughter, not only would they be going to jail but I would too and they better hope i don't get put in the same cell!

Leah - posted on 11/13/2010

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You bring up a good point Kati. When two people are raised by the same parents and end up completely different. I think it all depends on life choices, the crowd they hang out with etc.
However, in circumstances like serial killers, I do believe that nature does have an overwhelming influence.

And Tah, I agree. If anyone tried that with my daughter when she does Girl Guides, they better run and hide, not from me but from my husband. He would rip their fake hair out of their heads! Grrrr!

Rosie - posted on 11/13/2010

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what a bunch of bitches!!! holy hell... i don't know what to say. i don't know. i would have to know how they were raised to say for sure.
and some people - like my sister- turn out to be self serving, egotistical, no concern for anybody else bitches even with the best parenting. my sister and i were raised the same, she is completely different than i am. so theres an argument for nature.
depends on the person i guess. some people are just born with no moral compass, and cannot learn it.

Charlie - posted on 11/13/2010

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What a pair of self entitled bitches , i think it definatley is nurture , i don't believe you are born with the feeling of entitlement unlike other human characteristics .

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Mostly i feel and have seen my fair share of this, its from being brought up by parents who allow there children to do what the want and they also mimic there own parents behaviour.

You also have children who grow up and become part of the wrong group or hang with a wrong friend and they may do things there parents are not aware of.

I have to say from my experience from observing teens and younger childrens behaviour, the parents play a huge part in how there children turn out, sadly, when they end up doing stuff like this.

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I guess it depends. If they had never been taught it's wrong to streal then it would be nurute to blame but if they had it would be nature.

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These girls appear to be a product of materialism, which brings this into the nurture side of the debate, although as Sharon and Mary have pointed out there are other factors which we do not know about which affect the nature Vs nurture debate. The thing I find to be most shocking is this statement made by the second girl when asked what lessons they had learned from this experience "Probably not to get caught...or maybe not to steal *shrugs*" her FIRST lesson learned was not to be caught how sad.

LaCi - posted on 11/13/2010

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I think we do make a huge mistake when we associate "nurture" with parenting alone. There are a wide array of environmental influences, all of which teach an individual and shape our personality and behavior. It's totally possible that the girls had fantastic parents, but they have had plenty of other influences in their lives. Materialism is everywhere. Society demands materialism. Nurture, in its nature, is situational but it's still nurture. How an individual responds to any given stimuli is affected by how they've responded to other stimuli. Butterfly in china, of sorts.

Mary - posted on 11/13/2010

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I basically agree with Sharon; the impact of nature vs. nurture varies widely with each individual. Some of us are products of our upbringing, and some of us develop in spite of our environment. There are numerous examples of both throughout the world. There are people who grew up in deplorable conditions, without much in the way of support or encouragement who beat the odds and become truly remarkable human beings. There are also those who are raised in loving homes, who are taught right from wrong in both word and example, and somehow develop into despicable people without a care for those around them. Of course there are also those who just fall in line nicely with both the genetics and environment into which they are born.

April - posted on 11/13/2010

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The big thing for me is that they showed no remorse. Lack of remorse is usually a sign of of a socipath or someone with conduct disorder (children under a certain age cannot be diagnosed as a sociopath. hence the conduct disorder diagnosis) . Remorse can be learned BUT it is also innate. Our ability to empathize is what makes us human. If you are to say that most teenagers don't have remorse anymore, then you are also saying that they are no longer human, as well.

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Over the years, I have come to my own conclusion that the nature vs. nurture debate is situational and base don individual circumstances. So for the example above, the teenage thiefs may have been a product of lousy parenting and taught it's OK to steal, lie, and have no morals. BUT, with that being said, we reall ydon't know the teenagers backgrounds. They could have been products of loving doting parents who smother them, spoil them, and they are acting out. Or perhaps raised in the foster care system where that are taught to fend for themselves. It is possible that mental illnes of some capacity is genetically inherited so the whole scenarion of "Let's go rob the girl scout" might have been skewed by some inborn mental capacity.

LaCi - posted on 11/13/2010

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People aren't born self-entitled. They aren't born to be disrespectful. These are things you learn.



They sound like spoiled cunts who think they're entitled to frivolous accessories and have never been taught common decency or respect. Theft isn't even the issue, there are a lot of reasons I can justify theft, if it pertains to survival, survival is instinctual. This isn't about survival. This is about materialism and disrespect for fellow man, which are things we learn.

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