Noisy neighbors..

C. - posted on 10/03/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

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Ok, this is more of a rant than a debate, but these neighbors have been pissing me off for a long ass time.



Almost EVERY SINGLE TIME this lady has people over (her husband is deployed and she just got back from training several weeks ago) they have been noisy enough to wake my 2 year old up. We live in base housing, where about 4 houses are linked together, small space and then another 4 that are linked together, and so on.



One night while our friends were over, they were getting ready to leave and my son was already sleeping soundly. We were in the driveway as not to wake up my son, and our neighbor started having friends over (this was going on about 10 o'clock at night). They were noisy and my friend's husband got sick of it and went over and KINDLY asked them to keep the noise down b/c there was a 2 year old sleeping next door. They weren't quiet and I ALMOST called the MPs (Military Police). The only thing that kept me from doing so was that I wanted to be the one to warn them, and not my friend's husband. So I let it go that time.



Tonight, they were being super noisy. I was out back having a cigarette, they were on the porch outside, too (there is a privacy fence separating our porches and small yards from each other.) My husband, who was inside watching TV opened the door and looked over to their porch and had a look like 'What the hell??', so after he closed the door, I told them if they woke my 2 year old up, I would be calling the MPs. The lady was like 'Seriously? You could tell us!' I told her 'I'm telling you now, if you wake my son up I'm calling the MPs and I'm TRYING to be nice about it.' So she and her friends were like 'What'd she say?' 'Oh, I don't know, something.' 'I don't know what she said.'



Anyway, just really pissing me off and being VERY rude about it. They've been warned before, they've been warned tonight. Almost every time she has people over, she wakes my son up and I'm sick and tired of it. I've just had it! My son is sick right now and he needs all the rest he can get and she's sitting there bitching..



I'm sorry, but almost all of the people that live on this military installation has a child either ranging from newborn to teenager. Yes, it's the weekend, but little kids go to bed earlier than adults do. I just think living so close to one another, people should be considerate of others.



I could freakin' care less if she has people over and does God knows what in her house (one night they were so loud, I overheard them talking about sex and touching thighs and blah, blah, blah, so it was pretty clear she was cheating on her husband).. None of my business. What they do is THEIR business.. But don't subject other people to your nonsense! Do what you want- it's not my business so don't be loud enough to MAKE it my business.



Ugh, I'm just so pissed off right now that people can be so damn rude. Honestly, at this point, I don't feel bad how many times I have to call the MPs on them for disturbing the peace b/c they've been warned and they just keep on it. Am I wrong?

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Heather - posted on 10/03/2010

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There should be noise regulations on your post(where do you live?) that state quiet hours are from __ to __. Usually it's 10-6 during the week and 12am-8am on the weekends. If they're noisy after hours I would call the MP's anyway bc they're probably not bothering just you, it's everyone else too. Especially if this is a regular thing, I would just put in a noise complaint.

On another note, it really bothers me when army wives assume that because a woman who's husband is deployed is having a party, that she's cheating on him. Unless you see it with your own eyes(not hearing something questionable) you can do a lot of damage by just insinuating there's something innapropriate going on. Please DO mind your own business when it comes to her sex life. Don't even gossip that she might be having an affair bc "the only way a secret remains between two people is if one of them are dead". (Another of my husbands funny sayings)lol

Jodi - posted on 10/03/2010

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Christina, I am not saying you are wrong in being pissed off about it, because I would be too. I was just trying to say that UNLESS you have personally spoken to them before about it, I do think it was inappropriate to threaten to call the MP as your first point of contact. There are other ways it could have been handled, which may have resulted in quite an amicable outcome. As Loureen said, they didn't know they had woken your 2 year old before unless you discussed it with them.

Charlie - posted on 10/03/2010

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Yes i get that , what i am saying is how would they have known it was waking YOUR 2 year old ?



Im not condoning it , they sound like asshole neighbours ( i have noisy asshole neighbours too ) just saying first time confrontation is always best dealt with calmly , second confrontation can be treated as you wish call the MP's next time , if they ignore you now then its clear they are rude and inconsiderate of your request .



You asked if you were wrong and i believe you are not wrong , i would be pissed off too i just think a different approach could have been more productive .

Charlie - posted on 10/03/2010

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Obvioulsy what they are doing is inconsiderate however i agree that unless you have asked them yourself to please keep it down how are they to know its annoying YOU and your son ?

You would be surprised at how apologetic and understanding people can be if you approach them with no hostility .

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Your house sounds similar to mine, I live in a terrace of 4 houses (mine is a middle one) so I have 2 neighbours either side of mine and the walls are like paper. I have one side where the husband is a BIG drinker and after one of his sessions he comes home and starts shouting at his son, who then shouts back and then the mom starts in too, things get smashed and thrown and although I would happilygo and tell them to stfu my hubby stops me. I speak to them the next day when the arguments have calmed down, but that doesn't solve his drinking which is the problem (they are really nice apart from this).

The other side is chavtastic, they scream, play music so loud I can hear it the other side of my house, they have a rat (which disguises itself as a dog) which yaps constantly (aggressive little thing) and BOTH sides slam doors as if it is going out of fashion (my house shakes with the slams). When she is asked to be quiet she ignores it.

I have to admit that when she plays her music really loud now I do the grown up thing and play mine louder - it works :-D

I think maybe you could have gone about speaking with your neighbours differently but you are certainly within your right to be angry Christina.

Tah - posted on 10/03/2010

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and it's not just base housing, when i was pregnant and subletting my townhouse and ilving in an apt with my husband until his lease was up, our neighbor was the worse..sometimes the music would take the pictures off the wall. he was next to us and was so the loud the people directly under us called the cops. The downstairs neighbors had about 100 people in their 2 bedroom and were so loud you would think we were under them the way the noise came up. Our housing is a little different and we are blessed that our neighbors have some sense over here, but we all have at least 3 kids so we get it.

Petra - posted on 10/03/2010

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I've hard that this is a major problem in base housing... and I don't have any kind solutions to offer. I'd be right on there, calling the MPs the second the noise continued after the end-time for noise regulations. I think having a party and giving your neighbours a heads up prior to said party is fine so that they can expect some noise for that night is one thing - having partiers for neigbours sucks though. If you've been nice and given fair warning time after time after time, you're not out of line in calling the MPs.

Tah - posted on 10/03/2010

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let me say this being as though i live on base..well outside a base in base housing....i know what you mean and i understand. how many times do they need to be asked, your friend, which she knew to be your company, asked her already. If you want to be fair, go ring her bell and nicely..hey, i don't mind that you have friends over but i have a baby here and i am also trying ti heal so if you guys can keep it down, i would appreciate it, before the party people even get there...after that it. it sucks to be her if she is loud again, call them....

C. - posted on 10/03/2010

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@Heather, first of all, I hate that, too. But I HEARD them talking about it. Even tonight she was saying that her husband was still deployed and that she was having sex with one of the men that was over there. The other lady was asking about it and they continued to talk about it (and that's all the details I'm giving about that). They were saying it loud enough and clear enough that we could hear that part of their conversation in our house with the door closed WITH the TV on (they were talking about it after I had gone inside). I do mind my own business actually, but I am certainly not going to put earplugs in my ears while I'm in my own house watching TV with my husband just b/c someone chooses to say that loudly. So no, it's not assuming. And the other time.. Why would she have several guys over, only guys, and have them touch her thighs and she touch their penises.. That's just as much cheating, IMO. I actually heard all that when I was outside having a cigarette that day. Obviously they didn't know I was outside, or I'm sure they wouldn't have been saying it at all. But still. It pisses me off that they do that loud enough for others to hear. Nobody wants to hear it! If she's having an affair, that's her own damn business. I don't want to hear it, though. See what I mean? I keep to myself. I don't spread my business by my own mouth for the world to hear it. I would appreciate if neighbors in close proximity would be as to themselves with their personal affairs.

Jodi - posted on 10/03/2010

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Snap :) Sorry Christina, I just posted that at the same time you posted.

C. - posted on 10/03/2010

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I get what you're saying. I should have dealt with it better, but I had reached my breaking point. And it wasn't that I gave them attitude (tone-wise) about it until she gave me some, but I suppose I could have worded it so it didn't sound so threatening.

C. - posted on 10/03/2010

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Loureen, it doesn't matter if it annoys me. Just the simple fact that they are waking up a 2 year old should be more than enough. And no, when my friend's husband was KIND about asking them to keep it down, she gave him a dirty look and gave him attitude. So it has nothing to do with how nice or hostile we or my friends have been toward them, but everything to do with they don't want to be told to keep it down.

C. - posted on 10/03/2010

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I'm sorry, but this isn't the first time they've woken him up. Neither my son nor myself have been feeling good and my husband was not here a couple times that they woke him up recently. I'm certainly not going to go up to their door with a child that has (well HAD at the time) a virus so they can catch it, too.

I just think that when the houses are connected and they know there is a young child next door (they've seen him before and knew he was ours b/c they commented on how cute he was), then people need to be considerate of that fact. If they wanted to have people over and be all loud, they shouldn't have moved into Base Housing, IMO. It may have been a little rude, but I've just had it.

Regardless of WHO asked them the first time, the point is, they've been asked to keep the noise to a minimum and they continue to be all loud. I shouldn't even have to ASK for some courtesy. If they had children and we didn't, we wouldn't be keeping THEIR kids up at all hours. Never, in all my years of living on a military installation throughout my life, had we EVER had to ask our neighbors to keep the noise down. Ever! And we put up with a lot, b/c we can be noisy, too when my son's awake, so I try to be understanding. But when I can hear them from their living room- with both our doors and windows closed- all the way in my bedroom (our living rooms are side by side, the bedrooms are on the opposite side of the house that the living rooms are on)- It's TOO noisy.

Jodi - posted on 10/03/2010

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If this is the first time *you* have said something, I think that saying " I told them if they woke my 2 year old up, I would be calling the MPs." is a little bit threatening. I can totally understand you being upset about it, but if you have never said anything to them before and the first time you are threatening them with the MP, that's just a little full on too. You may have approached it differently initially.

C. - posted on 10/03/2010

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Thank you! This lady was giving me all kinds of attitude, too! I should have just called the MPs w/o being nice and giving her a warning.

Jessica - posted on 10/03/2010

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Nope, I would call the MP's every single time they got loud, let alone waking up my child.

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