Partner or Child

?? - posted on 11/30/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )




Man Saves Drowning Wife, Loses Son

Her Car Had Plunged Into River at Night

WELLINGTON, New Zealand (Nov. 29) -- As his wife floundered screaming for help in murky river water, a frantic New Zealand man was forced to abandon a bid to rescue his teenage son to save his partner from drowning, he said Monday.

Stacy Horton saved his wife, Vanessa, 35, as their son Silva, 13, drowned in the Whanganui River on North Island after her car plunged into the river late Saturday.

Horton said he arrived at the crash scene less than two minutes after the accident to hear his wife screaming in the darkness and to see his son's friend and the family dog scrambling up the bank. His son Silva was trapped inside the submerged station wagon.

He tried to dive down to the vehicle, which was nose down but with the tail lights burning more than 3 feet (1 meter) below the surface, he told the Dominion Post newspaper.

"I tried to get down and get him but I couldn't — it was just too deep. And Vanessa was going under," Horton told the newspaper.

"I made a call to pull my wife to safety. I looked back and I could see the tail lights but it was too far and I couldn't get him," he said.

"Instead of going down and risking my life as well as my wife and son's, I chose to take V(anessa) back and sat on the shore praying. It was all I could do," a distraught Horton said.

Police and fire officers also were unable to rescue the boy from inside the vehicle.

Mid-Central police spokeswoman Kim Perks said Monday it was a very tough call for Horton. "I would certainly not have wanted to be in his shoes."

Senior fire station officer Gary Wilson said the water was dark and murky and firefighters struggled in vain to reach the car.

"We tried everything but to no avail," Wilson said.

Divers recovered the boy's body on Sunday.

This is so horrible, I feel so badly for this man! Would you have made the same choice? If they both had the same chance of surviving and you had to choose one or the other, who would you choose? Would you be able to choose?


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[deleted account]

Son. My husband and I both agree that in a one or the other situation, we'd both save our child. We were watching an episode of House one night while I was pregnant where the guy wanted to save his wife instead of the baby (of course he ended up saving the baby, but that's not the point), and told him I'd crucify him if I woke up to find that he could've saved Colin or me but instead saved me. He and I have had several decades of living, but Colin is just starting out. But, as everyone seems to have said, you can never really tell until you're in the situation, and life saving classes dictate that you save the one with the better odds of survival. I feel awful for this guy and for his wife. I have no idea how I'd even begin to cope with surviving a situation like that if Colin didn't.

Jocelyn - posted on 11/30/2009




Unless I was in that situation, I don't know for sure how I would react. But I think I would save the one that I could, like Laura said. Now if it was a situation where they were both in equal danger, I would save my kids, flat out. My hubby would safe the kids as well.

JL - posted on 11/30/2009




Oh..that is so horrible. I feel so bad for that man. I would die if I had to go through that. The kids first and I would probably risk dying to safe them even if their chances seemed bleak compared to my partners, but who knows what I would do when actually facing that situation. I just don't know and it sickens me to think about it especially when considering that I have 2 kids and if I had to choose between them...I just couldn't I would rather go down myself than have to face such a situation.

Isobel - posted on 11/30/2009




I know it sounds horrible but they do teach you in classes to save the one you have to let the one you can't save go. Kinda like putting your own air mask on first in a plane crash.

Poor guy must be devastated.

Esther - posted on 11/30/2009




I don't think you can answer that question until you're in the middle of it. All things being equal I would without question go for my son, but all things are never equal. I just cannot imagine what this man must be going through. To see your son go down like that and not be able to do anything about it. I would rather shoot myself in the head.

Cathelijn - posted on 11/30/2009




That is horrible...!!

I don't think you can really say until you are in the situation and you just do what you have can!

However if it was a choice and I could save only one, I would save my daughter and I honestly think my husband would want me too, if he had to make the choice I would want him to save her I wouldn't want to live with the fact that that I survived over her.

I feel really bad for the man I am sure he did what he could..

Dana - posted on 11/30/2009




I would choose my son first as would my husband but, it seems as if this man had no choice. I would have done the same in his case.

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