Prepare to laugh....(especially Canadians)

[deleted account] ( 31 moms have responded )

Before Vancouver hosted the 2010 Winter Olympics, these were some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. The answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!

Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? ( England )
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto -can I follow the Railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? ( Sweden )
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. ( Italy )
A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? ( England )
A: What, did your last slave die from?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA )
A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-DA is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is after every Flames game in Calgary . Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada ?( England )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays after every hockey game in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada ? ( Germany )
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? ( USA )
A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA )
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

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[deleted account]

Sadly I am serious.

That was a few years ago (almost 10 years now -wow time flies when you aren't looking).

I was working at the Swiss Chalet as a waitress one summer and they pulled in with a big trailer. At first glance I thought they were heading for the cottage like the majority of tourists with wave runner/jet ski/ sea doo, but a closer look prompted by a coworker made us realize they were pulling snow mobiles not their similar water counterparts.
My co worker then went and asked them where they were headed. And they though the only had to drive an hour or two more to find snow.

It was about 28 C out that day. My coworker tried to convince them to save their money and head back home because they weren't going to find snow in Ontario at this time of year.
They wouldn't listen. They were determined if they drove far enough north they would find snow.
And technically they were right if they planned on driving to Nunavut.

We laughed pretty hard after they left.

[deleted account]

Oh my goodness that is soo funny.

As some one who grew up in northern Ontario, it was always hard not to laugh at the tourists from the states who would drive up with their snowmobiles in the middle of July and be shocked there was no snow.

[deleted account]

Becky, someone emailed it to me and I've since deleted it but you can just copy and paste it from here!

Dana - posted on 05/22/2010

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That's all pretty funny, I guess I can count myself lucky to not have met such idiots. ;)

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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Some of us celebrate both cause we like the excuse to go on dog sled hunts ;)

Suzette - posted on 05/21/2010

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Wow! I would say that I couldn't believe some people from the U.S. actually asked those questions, but I can. lol.

The only thing I didn't know about Canadians is you all celebrate Thanksgiving on a different day than we do. I just never thought of it... lol.

Nikki - posted on 05/21/2010

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I used to go to Florida every winter when I was little and thi couple we met were convinced we lived in igloos and asked what it was like to be in the sun and if our bodies can handle it , they asked us if we had cars or just dog sleds and they were 100% serioius

[deleted account]

I actually just got back from visiting my mom's family in Revelstoke only a couple weeks ago....on the Coquihalla we saw a moose running along side us just on the other side of the fence...CRAZY! We also saw a bear cub and a beaver, which I've never seen before!

We lived in Peachland when I had my daughter (Sept.08) and we used to get tons of deer in our backyard all the time....so amazing to watch!

Take pics....can't wait to see!

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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Thanks Dana ! We will be, we always are :) Apparently there was a slide go down around the bluffs in the last storm so we'll be takin it easy, hopefully the road will be open haha



I'm hoping we get to see more wildlife this time! Last time I only got to see 2 elk and a bear at a distance, and a lot of deer. So I'm hoping we get to see more elk, closer up this time and maybe a bear too... I'll keep my fingers crossed !

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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I always have to stop at the top of the bluffs at the Silverton view point on the way through. Walking out over to the fence, looking over... and seeing nothing but valley, mountain and lake... pure and wild... I love it so.

I'm totally stoked to be going there tomorrow!!! I'm hoping to convince Devon to leave tonight hehehe

[deleted account]

I ♥ BC too! Small world......not only do I live in Abbotsford but it's funny that you mention Revelstoke because my mom was raised there and we visit her family often! You're right about the drive...it's gorgeous!

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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The surrounding area of Trail and the rest of this area is beautiful lol Trail itself is ugly cause Cominco looms over it like ........ Hexxus in Fern Gully lmao

I'm going to my parents this weekend which is 2.5 hrs towards Revelstoke from here.... I LOVVVVVVVVVE the travel there and that area, now THAT area is BEAUTIFUL !

I have been to the coast, many times :) My brother and sister both live in Abbotsford and my aunt, uncle & cousin live on the island.

I ♥ BC

[deleted account]

That's awesome, Jo....I've never been to trail although I've heard it's beautiful there?!! Have you ever been to the coast?

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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My parents have husky / malamute dogs, had 3 but the mom died so now just 2... they live 5 minutes up the road from a campground that is always packed full all summer with people from Seattle to Europe. I can't even tell you how many times campers have asked if the dogs are our transportation in the winter.

They've also asked if there is so much snow that it covers our houses in winter, and is that why we have to live in igloo's.

I've even been asked where my moose or beaver pets are...

?? - posted on 05/21/2010

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LMAO Jodi, when I was in Australia I was sitting on the deck of my apartment... a little old Aussie woman went by me and I said hi, she asked if I was American and I said no Canadian and she looked at me like :o and then yelled to her friend back up the street saying "HEY MISSY COME LOOK !!! A REAL LIVE CANADIAN !!!!!!!"

Caitlin - posted on 05/21/2010

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Dana that's hillarious! Don't they even realise that penguins are in antarctica, not the arctic. Seriously. I could see people having misconceptions about Quebec, because we're all backwards here anyways, but 45 mins from the border! Laughable!

[deleted account]

@Caitlin......I'm in Abbotsford, BC (5 mins from the Sumas border crossing into Washington State and only 45 mins from Bellingham) and I actually had some dude from Bellingham ask me, " Where's the penguins...I thought you all lived in igloos? "......he was genuinely shocked!

Bahaha!

Caitlin - posted on 05/21/2010

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OMG hilarious, thank you.. I really needed that... I'm surprised there were no questions about igloos.. that one is a popular one.. I used to get that question a lot online, I'd say my time in the communal igloo internet cafe was up.. :P

Jodi - posted on 05/21/2010

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Oh, that is so funny. What stupid questions!! I am just breathing a sigh of relief to note that none of those stupid questions came from any Aussies, LOL. Makes me feel superior :)

?? - posted on 05/20/2010

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omg lmao hahahahahahahahahaha

you know the scary thing... I've actually had people ask me those questions and questions similar many times, in real life, to my face. BAHHHHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

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