Selling Off Everything-Financial Distress

[deleted account] ( 47 moms have responded )

Have you ever been in such a dire financial situation that you had to sell off everything? Pawn shop your goods? Part with treasured collections? Did you ever reclaim some of your items?



A friend of mine was in this situation last year, on top of not recognizing her alcoholism. She's come a long way in a year with treatment, but she still has almost no material possessions left-maybe a half a dozen boxes of stuff. Everything else was sold off. She no longer blames anyone but herself. Yet her only treasured or meaningful items are memory boxes/photo albums. She lives with someone who financially foots the bill for her living expenses.



I have been fortunate that I am great at money management and never been in a financial crisis. Sure, we have the same heavy bills like everyone else, but only ONCE in my life I bounced a check. I always make certain bills are paid on time, no late fees, never had any utility turned off, always have my security safety net. I think this is why my friend always turned to me for financial assistance. But I have never had to sell off any material possesion in order to survive. I have alot of collectibles, and my husband is a hoarder of old toys from the 80's that can bring in money. But never a need to get rid of them.

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Sara - posted on 12/01/2010

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I just want to support what Sara H was saying,my husband and I have a similar system. We have a weekly budget for groceries/entertainment/gas/diapers/etc that we take out in cash at the beginning of the week. We spend only cash and when we're out of money, we're out of money. My husband is an accountant, so we've tried really hard to stick to this to realize our long-term financial goals such as paying off debt, buying a new house, etc. It works really well for us. When we're out of cash, we're out of cash. We have credit cards, but only for emergencies. We're on the road to be completely debt free (no mortgage, no student loans, no credit card debt) in about 5 years.

Tah - posted on 11/29/2010

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@Sara, we only use cash, we don't even have credit cards..lol. I had one when i was 18, that was enough. We do better that way, we don't spend as much and we don't have to worry about going into any debt because of them. It helps us to know what is coming in and going out and is the reason we do so well. We always get offers for credit cards but we don't fold. It's a good idea for those who use credit cards to live because i think it can give a false sense of security or an illusion that people have what they really don't and allows them to make purchases that they can't really afford. vicious cycle...

[deleted account]

I don't like having too many possessions. My entire family is full of border-line hoarders and their house looks hideous. So I make sure I don't ever buy more than I'll ever need, and I hate receiving gifts. My husband seems to think I'm crazy, but...

I just don't want my house to turn into my family's.

So I usually donate or sell the unused or unneeded stuff so it doesn't congregate in some corner somewhere.

Hubby says I should allow myself some luxuries...but I can't help but disagree with him.

[deleted account]

I'm not going to get into details here but shit happens. I've never had to sell off everything but pawn some stuff we didn't need in the first place yes. Sometimes, you get screwed over or something comes up and slaps you in the face without warning. It's happened to us and to be honest it was pawning some of our unnecessary stuff to get by or being short on rent. I don't regret it.

Heck, we tried to help someone and he spit in our face. At that point we had nothing left to fall back on and we did what we had to do. It saved our relationship and relieved stress.

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Mrs. - posted on 12/01/2010

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I was very sick in my mid twenties and even in Canada, it broke me. I'm an actor so I'm used to living poor but had to sell things that got me work like a guitar and the like. Had to move in with my parents with my bf at the time, leave Canada to save up money and get the medical attention I needed.

It's not always credit cards that break you. Even in Canada ;).

[deleted account]

Btw, congrats on your plans to get debt free!! We don't have any debt either except for our home, which should be paid off in a year or two. (And the credit card which our bank automatically pays in full on the 1st of each month).

Not sure if it will help or not, but here is a trick we use for buying our cars. We pay "cash" (E-Transfer from our bank). Even though the car is paid for, we still make car payments to ourselves every month. Then, when it is time to buy the car (we buy one every 5-8 years) we don't have to get a loan. It is amazing how much interest you pay on a loan. Like, to finance a $20k car for 5 yrs @4.5%, your payments would be around $460/month (I don't know the math, I'm going on memory from the dealership, sorry if it is off). But if you pay $460/month into your own account you can buy a $27k car at the end of 5 yrs.(That part I do know, plus you earn interest, but it's not really enough to matter).

Also, we always pay about 20% more on our mortgage payment every month, that goes directly towards the principle and thus reduces the amount you are charged interest on. We financed our house for 30 yrs (in case we hit hard times, we could lower the payment and not risk loosing the house), but we will have it paid off in 10 yrs, just by paying that little bit extra.

[deleted account]

Sorry, Sara, this cash only thing is NOT working for me :/
Today, all I had to do was buy a baby shower gift and a pair of shoes.
Got my Sobe from the gym and paid the bell ringer outside to get my day off to a good start. Could not find ANYTHING on the gift registry for my friend actually in stock. (She should have registered for more stuff). I ended up getting her some things I loved having but that she didn't register for, and a gift card. I hate gift cards, and I don't know if she'll like my gift. Plus, I said the wrong amount when they rung up the gift card b/c I forgot that I had added another sleep sac. Plus, she wanted everything in gender neutral colors, which are getting VERY HARD to find.
Luckily, there was a bell ringer outside the store.
High point! I did get to use the cheaper parking garage that only takes cash and is closer to the shoe store today! But when the cashier rang up my shoes, I was $4 short--that is when I realized that the $10 I dropped in the bell ringer bucket at the baby store was a $50. I was LIVID. There was no way I was going to walk back to my car, drive to the bank, pay for the garage again, and get back to the store for $4 so I gave up and paid with my credit card. I've missed my credit card. So easy...no counting...no wondering where it's been, who's nasty hands have touched it....no driving to the bank repeatedly or forgetting stuff...
Anyway, I gave up on the week, but I still had $112 cash left from not paying for my shoes with it, so I found another bell ringer and put a REAL $10 in it. I don't really know how to put cash in the bank, so I think I'll just keep the rest to put in bell ringer buckets when I'm sad, but when i run out, I'm not getting anymore $$ out of the bank.

[deleted account]

Sara B...5 years? You can see the light at the end of the tunnel! Congrats! We're debt free...except for the house. But it will be a long road ahead of us build our savings to what we want and pay off the house. It's encouraging to see that other people are of the same mindset!

A - posted on 12/01/2010

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I was a lot like you a year ago. great credit, bills paid on time. credit lines with no balance. Then I had a son. Decided to stay home to raise him. We bought a house with a payment we could afford on my husbands income. Thought we had all of our bases covered.

Then 3 months after my son was born my husband was unexpectedly laid off. We thought he was going to get a promotion- not laid off. No one in his field was hiring. Any other job wouldn't have paid enough. We started our own business. Now, a year into owning our own business we're really struggling. My husband has picked up another job on top of our business. I work for the business part time and raise our son. Our credit cards are maxed and last month was the first time I've had to start picking and choosing which bills to pay and which to let go.

Recently we've started selling some possessions to pay bills or get gas for the car, etc. We just got food stamps. I'm currently trying to get some more stuff together to sell.

Its tough. I haven't been late on our mortgage yet- which is good. I'm just keeping positive. Hopefully things will get better :)

You're lucky you are doing well. Keep in mind I we went from upper middle to povery it a matter of a few months. Make sure those savings are adequate. We had some savings but not nearly enough.

Veronica - posted on 11/30/2010

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When my hubby and I first got together, we did pawn off his movies - but immediatly bought them back before the month was even over. It was to pay a bill, i think... Otherwise, we just go day by day. We aren't financiallly set or stable in any manner at the moment - but still manage to put food on the table, keep a roof over our heads, etc. My hubby works towards more hours at work, and I work towards building a business. There actually were a few times we were ready to sell off our wedding rings to get by - but things ended up working out. We push out for our bills, and household/kids/gas first - and the rest just gets us by for the week, and we have been able to put aside savings for back up.

You just do what you have to do -- and keep working towards improving the situation. I dont get down or depressed about it - and more importantly I take nothing for granted, as there are people who are in worst financial predicaments - I only pray that things improve - but with the world out of whack, who knows when the light at the end of this tunnel will show up...

[deleted account]

I've been down for most of my adult life. I'm almost to the point of having to sell shit again but I don't have much left to sell and nothing worth a significant amount. I don't have any problem with getting rid of material items to make sure my family has what they need. I don't spend any money and my hubby spends very little on gas and household needs. The bills take everything and then some and I live in Montana and it's winter and they want to shut my power off. I've always been good with money but I have 4 kids and the job market has been officially fucked for quite some time now.

So we have no choice but to just keep trying.

[deleted account]

I'm not more organized...I just don't buy it if I don't have the cash! For the record, if the money has already be set aside for something in our budget, I go ahead and use my debit card. For example: We decided to get my daughter a swing set for Christmas. The money for it is in the bank. It's not an impulse purchase, we planned for it. So I'll just use debit. The cash really helps curb those impulse purchases though!

[deleted account]

That does help!

See, I had set the money for the books aside in my mind in the bank, I just didn't take it out of the bank because I didn't think I was going to buy them this week. One was a text book so it was a lot of cash to carry around just in case I was near the book store, plus, to be honest, I completely forgot about them when I was deciding how much $$ to get out of the bank.
The book store is like 45 minutes from my house in the opposite direction I usually go, and it just seemed silly not to go ahead and buy them while I was there. I guess I shouldn't have used the grocery money to buy the books, but it really didn't make a difference, as I would have just had to get the money for them out next week, right?

You are DEFINITELY more organized than me! I can't believe you can plan an entire week....and I didn't manage to make it through an entire day--unless you count yesterday when I didn't leave the house. To be fair, I did have money left when I got to the bank...just not enough to cover groceries.

Stifler's - posted on 11/30/2010

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That's why I don't use cash haha coz then I can go to Subway or KFC without Damian seeing it on the bank statement and laughing at me about it when I say I'm on a diet or not eating shit food this week.

[deleted account]

Kelly, are you trying to prove me wrong...lol!

A little more info for you:
I withdraw a specific amount for groceries. I withdraw a specific amount for random purchases...like the books and hot chocolate. The money does not overlap. I do not use grocery money to make random purchases. I do not use "fun" money for groceries. It all stays separate. Perhaps that would help? I don't make more than 1 trip to the make per week, sometimes per two weeks. I'm just in the mindset that once the money is gone...it's GONE and I'll just have to wait to get whatever else I needed/wanted. =)

[deleted account]

"Cash Only Week" day two did not go as well as day one.

Dropped J off at school and headed to the gym. I got a Sobe out of the vending machine there, which I usually can't do b/c it only takes cash. It was yummy :)

Girlfriend called and asked me to brunch at the deli by the book store. I had been planning to buy 3 books next time I was near the book store, but I didn't realize I would be in that area yesterday when I was getting my $$ out of the bank. The book store is not in an area I go to often, so I decided to buy the books so I would not have to make an extra trip later. That meant I had to go back to the bank before the grocery store, and had to cut my brunch short, which put me in a rather sour mood.

I saw a bell ringer outside the bookstore and dropped a $10 in it, which I never get to do because I don't carry cash. Instantly, I felt much better!

Had to stop for gas on the way to the bank and had no idea how much to buy (you have to prepay around here). Tried to do the math based on my tank size and my gas gage but ended up buying 2 gallons more than would fit in my tank. which put me back into a sour mood. Probably could have gone in for a refund, but it was less than $6 and I only had 2 hours left to get to the bank and buy groceries before picking up J from school.

Saw a bell ringer at the grocery store and put another $10 in the bucket to cheer me up from the gas station fiasco. It worked again! I like those things :)

They were selling hot chocolate in the car line at J's school, I usually can't buy that stuff b/c I don't carry cash, but I had some, so I bought a hot chocolate, a juice box and 2 doughnuts for $8.It was for a good cause too :)

Lucy - posted on 11/30/2010

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We actually sold off all our valuable stuff, the car, dramatically down sized our house etc by choice, not because we were in a bad way financially.

We both worked full time after our first child was born but felt it would suit us better as a family for me to be a SAHM. We knew that to make it happen we would have to pay off any debts (overdrafts, student loans etc,) and ensure that we wouldn't mount up any more. I earned more than my husband, so our income was about to be slashed by about 60%.

We now have a much reduced mortgage, deal only in cash and steer clear of credit cards or loans. We also have no luxuries (except for the rickety old computer and internet connection I use to chat with you lovely ladies!) but we are definitely happier. There is something very liberating about getting rid of all the junk you don't need and simplifying your finances.

I'm not suggesting that everyone should do it, but I just wanted to say that selling up doesn't have to be a painful thing. it can allow you to have the lifestyle you want if you're prepared to make the sacrifice!

[deleted account]

Lol Kelly! I actually look at it as an advantage to drive out of the way to get my cash. I can't spend if I don't have it! But yes, it can be a hassle.

As far as knowing how much to withdraw, our budget determines that. I actually go once every two weeks to the bank to get what we need. I withdraw what I'll spend on groceries, restaurants, and fun money. It's all pre-determined. I use my debit card for gas for safety reasons (I have a kid in a car seat!). If I don't use all my grocery cash, for example, it will roll over to the next two week period. I'll just withdraw a little less during my next bank trip. I put the unused money into savings (I can transfer online).

It does take some getting used to. But it's been very worthwhile for my family!

[deleted account]

I don't like to have a lot of clutter either, Jamie. I have ADD and looking at too many unrelated, or non-useful, decorative items on a table or shelf gives me a headache.

Anyway, I'm starting my "Cash Only Week": Sara mentioned earlier that people spend less when they use cash. We are doing pretty well with my credit card system, but I thought I would try it out and compare what I spend this week to what I spend during a regular week.

I went to the Bank this morning to get some. I can't remember the last time I paid for something with cash, it actually felt strange having it in my hands! lol!
You definitely have to be more organized to use cash. First off, It was rather difficult to get the money out of the bank. I had to drive a good bit out of my way, then I didn't have the right card or a checkbook to get the money--I thought I could just show them my ID, but they don't like that. Then I had to decide how much to get, which was rather difficult, as I know what I spend over a month and on certain items, but I had to think about what things I was going to shop for that particular week because I did not want to carry around a large amount of cash, but I also did not want to bother trying to get money out of the bank again this week.

I didn't buy anything today, but that is not surprising. I took J to school, spent the day decorating for Christmas, picked him up and took him to Taekwondo, and that was it, so I didn't actually go anywhere to spend the $$. Tomorrow, I am going to the grocery store though.

Stifler's - posted on 11/29/2010

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yeah i suppose, damian had to prove all this crap to Suncorp for a car loan, but we ended up going with a finance company because Suncorp refused to negotiate the interest rate by 0.05% and the finance company went lower.

LaCi - posted on 11/29/2010

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Before I'd sell off all my stuff I'd do phone sex work or become a cam girl. The internet is a glorious way to make money :D

Sarah - posted on 11/29/2010

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They do. They've only started offering one to me since I had to keep extending my overdraft because of my College fees!
When I didn't have any debt with them, I'd get the odd letter asking me if I wanted a credit card, since I've had the overdraft, I get a letter practically every week, and any time I go into the bank, they try to get me to have one.

Luckily, I KNOW that I can't be trusted to have one. lol.

Stifler's - posted on 11/29/2010

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They bait you with them. Commonwealth used to send me letters saying I'd been pre approved for a $10 000 credit card... when I made about $25 000 a year.

Sarah - posted on 11/29/2010

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Nope, never had to sell off any of possessions.
We've been in some pretty dodgy financial positions though, at one point we had Baliffs coming round and noting all the valuable stuff to take if we didn't pay back the money we owed. (I say we, it was my husbands debt not mine, he did pay it back.)

I also got into trouble having a credit card. I spent the whole lot on a load of crap, and then couldn't keep up with the repayments very well. Then I fell pregnant with my eldest and luckily for me, my brother-in-law paid it off for me, and I just paid him back without any interest.
For me, credit cards ARE evil, and I would never have one again, though they keep offering me one!! I think it's terrible that banks offer credit cards specifically to those who are already in debt, making out that it will save them money and stuff. They're just trying to make people have even MORE debt.

[deleted account]

That's exactly it! I'm not a well organized person (though I'm improving!) so keeping up with how much I've spent vs. how much I have left when using credit is difficult for me. Plus I'm pretty visual. When I open my wallet and see only a $20 left for the week, I'll skip stopping by the craft store.

You'll have to let me know how you do with your cash this week. But like I said, I'm sure you're doing just fine with your credit cards!

[deleted account]

Thanks, Sara, that is an interesting concept. I have actually not used cash in so long that I couldn't tell you what it "feels like" so to speak, but maybe I'll get a little and try it this week. It would be interesting to see if I spend less.



We do basically the same thing you do. I have a predetermined budget (though it is not very detailed or tight) that I try to stick to. Even though I'm using a credit card, I know the money to pay for the stuff I'm buying is in the bank, and if there is not enough in the bank to cover my purchase, I don't buy it. To me, it is the same as cash, but I guess cash is easier for some b/c you can actually see how much you have, instead of just knowing a number?

Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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I agree with Kelly that if you use them for everything and keep track of it they are good and no bank fees etc. and if you pay it off before the period there's no interest but the fact is that I am not that responsible and would live beyond my means if that's what we did and neither are a lot of people. I know a few people who use the credit card for everything system and it works for them though.

Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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Go Sarah! Until recently we were debt free, no credit cards or loans etc.... and then we're like WE WANT A COOL NEW CAR and got a $28 000 loan and lost $5000 trading in our 2 year old smaller and not as fast car because we were too lazy to sell it privately. I think we're going though a reckless phase right now and still haven't saved up a house deposit. But the new car will be paid off in 3 years min. and then we can save for a house, we're young you only live once.

[deleted account]

Kelly, I have a different opinion on credit cards (obviously or I wouldn't bother posting this!) but I'm glad they are working well for you. From what I can tell from seeing your posts around here, you're doing well financially and making very smart decisions. So I won't be the one to tell you to cut them up!

But, people spend more when they have a credit card. It's just way too easy. Even if you pay everything off at the end of the month, most people still spend more than if they would have used cash. It hurts to spend cash.

I get a certain amount of cash each week for all my needs. It's based on a pre-determined budget. When I go to the grocery store I only take the amount I'll need. This prevents impulse and overspending. I'll spend only what I actually have in hand. I do the same when we go out to eat as a family or go clothes shopping or anything really. So I'm not worried about having cash being stolen. If it is, it won't be more than $100 at the very most.

[deleted account]

As an adult, no, I've never had to sell anything for money.
That said, I do know what it is like. I was born to a blue-collar middle class family. When I was 4, we became homeless, my parents had to sell everything we owned. For the next 9 years, I had no toys, no books, and all of the clothes I owned fit into a duffel bag.

As a result, I am overly cautious with money. Credit cards are not "Evil" They only get you in trouble if you are not responsible enough to use them properly. We pay for EVERYTHING with our Mastercard. One, way safer than carrying cash--people will steal cash, and when they do, it's gone. If they steal a credit card, you're only out $50 or less depending on your insurance. Two, you can easily keep track of everything you spend $$ on, so you know exactly how much you are spending, on what you are spending it, and where to cut spending if you need to. Three, reward points. The card we use now puts 1% of everything we spend into our son's college account. Certain purchases can earn up to 9%. Four, if you pay it off at the end of the month, you do not pay any interest. Also, you only have one bill to pay every month instead of separate bills for all your utilities, insurance, and other expenses.

[deleted account]

We did a major financial overhaul this year. A complete 180 in how we handle money. Cut up the credit cards. Set a strict budget. Paid off $20,000 of debt. Now all we have is a mortgage. The money that was previously going towards debt is now going to savings. We'll do that for a few years, then focus that money on paying off the house. That, coupled with good insurance (health, life and auto) should cover us if anything catastrophic happens.

The early years of our marriage were reckless. We were blessed (or lucky, however you want to look at it) that no major events occurred to set us further into debt than we already were. ONE smart thing we did was save every bit of money I made the year I worked as a teacher. That got us through the 3 months my husband was laid off and we had a small baby to care for. The rest was used as our down payment on our current home. Other than that we were idiots with our money.

So no, I'm very lucky that we've never been in the situation you are describing, and we're working hard to ensure that it doesn't happen.

Unless you want to count garage sales. We had a HUGE one this past spring. If the object wasn't nailed down it got moved outside to be sold! That may be an exaggeration, but it's close to the truth! If I didn't NEED it, or LOVE it, I sold it! That was partially due to me coming to the realization that stuff is just that. Stuff. It clutters your house and can take over your life if you let it. That was in the middle of our big financial life change. I was ready to put every bit of the garage sale money towards the debts, but my sweet husband said I should buy some curtains for the new house. That was a relief, because we literally had flowered sheets hanging from our windows at that point! But the curtains I bought were from Target...before I would have skipped right on over to the custom drapery shop and spent 4X the amount we had made from the sale.

Caitlin - posted on 11/28/2010

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We were going through some issues recently, and we ended up selling a lot of things, my desktop computer, his really nice watch, all my gold jewlery (except my wedding rings) and we sold a LOT of his stuff (he had a lot) currently we have our house on the market, but we are up to date on payments as of yet, I had to go back to work WAY before my maternity leave was up, which was disapointing, but these things happen sometimes. We have a few credit cards, they are all maxed out, but we keep up on the minimums for the next little bit, until this summer when we can hopefully move and get better jobs. Oh the credit cards only got maxed out after a big car accident that had my husband unable to work for like 9 months.. That didn't help, we still haven't recovered from that yet.

[deleted account]

Never been at that point and I'd better never get there... I don't own anything WORTH selling.... ;)

Bonnie - posted on 11/28/2010

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I think rather than selling off everything, it would help to cut up the credit cards for starters so that they can not be used an further. Maybe sell things you know you don't use or will never use again. There is also an option of going bankrupt, but that hurts your credit for a while, but at least you still have all your belongings.

Sara - posted on 11/28/2010

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Everyone can go through hard times. You never know what can happen. My husband and I are comfortable, but if something catostrophic happened, we'd be probably be fucked. So would a lot of people.

I work with a woman who is the poster child for financial irresponsibility. Her husband works sporadically, so she's the main breadwinner for her family of four. A couple of years ago her father-in-law, who was wheelchair bound, moved in with them to help them with their living expenses. The promptly maxed out his credit cards, unknown to him, to pay their mortgage on which they were several months behind. It was discovered that they squeezed him for about 12 grand by the time he died a few months after he moved in. They were still defaulting on their mortgage and car payments, so what did they do? They took a fucking trip to Disneyworld because they needed to have some fun. Awesome! I'd like to smack her in the face most days.

[deleted account]

The last year was really tough on us. We did have to pawn a few pieces of jewlelry, but we do continue to pay the interest (about $20 every 6 months), but we aren't yet able to buy back the items. It's really not that big of a deal, but it is a bit embarassing to go into the pawn shop - at least it was for me. We've never had to sell our stuff to live though, and for that I am grateful. My FIL sometimes helps us out (our home business is still getting off the ground), and hopefully I will be able to find a job soon. Then we'll be in better shape, but we're getting by now.

Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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Credit cards are evil hey, some people max them out and apply for another one with a lower rate and transfer all their purchases to the lower rate one to "pay off" the first one and so on until they have like 5 or more credit cards. My mother in law does this and it's so bad she is going to end up in serious debt,

Amie - posted on 11/28/2010

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Oh and credit cards are evil. I don't know why anyone has them and uses them on a regular basis.



We own 2, a master card and a visa. The visa is for when (if) we travel out of the country. It has $1,000 limit. Our master card has a $500 limit and is only used for online purchases. It is always paid off when it's used.

Oh wait, I know one person who uses his regularly but he maxes it out and pays it off, he's doing it to build credit so he can be approved for a larger mortgage. He has no credit so was approved for a dismal amount.

Amie - posted on 11/28/2010

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I know people who have had to do something similar, though not this extreme. They had to sell their home.



The wife had ended up on disability through work and it was not enough, even with their life savings. She could not return to work, they had to re-educated her and she's now back in the work force but because of that one situation, that was out of their control, they lost their dream house.



Even with security nets in place it doesn't take much for the tables to turn completely. They still have their material things but are more happy that they have their family and the mementos from that. (photo albums, kids art from school, etc.)



Those are more important, even in my eyes. My husband and I do own a lot of crap. It's status, we own it because we can afford it. Anyone who claims otherwise is delusional. Just the way it is, if I had to sell off everything I would. The important things, are not worth anything to anyone but me and my family.



We have our security nets too but I'm not crazy enough to think it is not at least a smidgen possible we could lose it all. We're even prepared for if my husband or I die. However if my husband got hurt, did not die but could not return to work... our savings and investments would only get us so far. Both of us would have to go back to work and even then... I don't think we'd make enough to maintain the lifestyle we have now. That's ok though, as long as our family is together and our basics are provided for.

[deleted account]

I hocked my mom & dad's wedding rings a few years back when we were in a financial bind. Didn't get much for them and didn't regret doing it, never went back to get them. They had been divorced for years, and both of them are deceased so when I hocked them, I don't know, I just didn't feel bad about it at all. If anything, it was a relief to not have them in my posession anymore. I also joked with the jeweler who bought them and said he needed to melt them down and make something else out of them because no one deserves to be cursed by wearing their rings. They were HORRIBLE together.



Add edit: I also hocked (sold) my wedding ring set from my previous marriage. That one I kinda felt bad about and it's strange. We were over, none of those feelings left between us but we remained friends. Selling that ring made me feel bad, I think because he had had it designed and made just for me. Oh well, no worries :)

Katherine - posted on 11/28/2010

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I too went to treatment. Alcoholism will do that: make you lose everything. Your focus is on getting the booze, screw everything else.
I can totally relate. Thank God I was never IN that situation, but before I got married I was on my way. I was living paycheck to paycheck, maxing out credit cards(drunk or course) just doing impulsive things.
Good for her she cleaned up, it's not easy, and it's even harder to admit you have a problem.

Stifler's - posted on 11/28/2010

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No way. I've been poor before but my parents just used what money they had and didn't max their credit cards out over delusions of grandeur. I don't work but my husband has gotten a great job and we just pay bills and buy food/nappies before anything else. If we can't afford to pay the whole bill that week we pay it next week and put money away no matter what even if it's only 10 bucks a week into an account, it all adds up.

Rosie - posted on 11/28/2010

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i never have and if i ever do it will be because of circumstances beyond my control. a friend of mine did something similar a few years ago, and it could've all been avoided if she would've just worked, and forced her husband to get a job that is reliable. instead he kept relying on their home business that wasn't doing well. they lost their house, they had to sell all their cd's dvd's , and some furniture. not something i'm willing to risk just so i can stay home.

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